They say having children changes everything. While it’s unquestionably a remarkable time in one’s life, I can also see how the transition introduces obvious limitations. Suddenly you have dependent beings of life to care for. Responsibility kicks in, compelling you to dedicate a significant portion of your time and attention to the best interests of the little ones. Combine this with the obvious physical and lifestyle limitations that come with age and it seems to me that there are several activities to check off the bucket list before settling down to start a family.
Here’s our list of 70 things to do before having children. For us, it’s simply about conquering as many life experiences as possible. We’re not quite there yet, but we’re getting closer. 😉
- Live in a high rise condo with an amazing view.
- Take a month long vacation on the opposite side of the world in a city with a completely different culture.
- Attend the Super Bowl live.
- Jump out of a perfectly good airplane.
- Make love in places you aren’t supposed to.
- Swim with the sharks.
- Scuba-dive to a large ship wreck.
- Audition to be on TV or in a movie… even if you’re just an extra.
- Throw the house party of all house parties. Supply all the booze and invite everyone you know.
- Take sexy photos of yourself (keep them somewhere safe).
- Learn to fly a plane.
- Become skilled with a musical instrument.
- Live in southern California for at least a year.
- Live in the heart of New York City, Chicago, Boston or another major city for at least a year.
- Spend a few weeks vacationing on the beaches of Kauai with your partner.
- Surf a Hawaiian wave.
- Learn to speak a foreign language.
- Visit the North Pole.
- Attend The Tonight Show or The Late Show as an audience member.
- Read at least 30 books.
- Jump off a cliff into a natural body of water in an exotic location.
- Go mountain climbing.
- Go deep sea fishing and learn to filet and cook your own fish.
- Go horseback riding on the beach with your partner.
- Drink warm beer out of a barrel in a real Irish pub.
- Spend a night pub-hopping in London.
- Stage dive and crowd surf at a rock concert.
- Take a set amount of money and hit the Blackjack and Craps tables in Las Vegas.
- Visit a high-end Las Vegas strip club.
- Embark on a month-long road trip across the country with 3 of your best friends.
- Ride a camel across a sandy desert.
- Go white water rafting.
- Go snowboarding in the Rockies.
- Get in great shape and enter some kind of fitness competition.
- Attain a solid understanding of how the government works in your country.
- Master one particular style of dance.
- Fall in love.
- Write a book… even if it’s short and never gets published.
- Drive through a (somewhat safe) portion of a third world country like Mexico or Costa Rica to gain perspective on what true poverty looks like.
- Go skinny dipping in a large body of water at midnight.
- Take a shower under a waterfall.
- Decide on your current life goals and write them down.
- Spend New Years Eve in Times Square.
- Go on a blind date (or a couple’s dinner date with new friends you hardly know).
- Sleep on the beach under the stars in Key West.
- Hit up Oktoberfest in Munich.
- Hit up Mardi Gras in New Orleans.
- Hit up Carnival in Rio de Janeiro.
- Experience Spring Break in all its glory in Cancun, Mexico or Panama City Beach, Florida.
- Catch a ride in a hot air balloon.
- Rent a fast sports car and speed down the Autobahn.
- Switch jobs until you find one you truly enjoy.
- Buy your first house.
- Own a convertible sports car.
- Hike the Grand Canyon.
- Attend a Red Sox vs. Yankees game in Fenway Park.
- Spend a whole day making love without every leaving the house.
- Learn to make one mixed cocktail like a pro bartender.
- Run a marathon.
- Stand up in front of a large audience and tell a great joke.
- Shoot a gun.
- Swim across the English Channel.
- Bicycle ride down a mountain road.
- Learn to sail a sailboat.
- Learn the basics of a martial art.
- Visit the Amazon Rainforest.
- Bare all on a nude beach.
- Master one really cool magic trick.
- Master a few fancy dinner recipes.
- Finish up your formal education (but continue learning).
What’s on your list?
Also, check out these books for more awesome bucket list ideas:
- This Book Will Change Your Life
- 2Do Before I Die: The Do-It-Yourself Guide to the Rest of Your Life
- 100 Things to Do Before You Die: Travel Events You Just Can’t Miss
Photo by: Dawvon
Dave says
Maybe I am jaded because I already have kids. But a lot of these things can get done while you have children, they are just more complicated!
Kids should be viewed as part of the “journey” of life and not as a hindrance to things you want to get done. Because if you look at it that way, people would never have kids (and it is kind of a selfish viewpoint).
On the flip side, it is important to set and achieve your goals, regardless of children.
Anyway, this is a good “bucket list”!
Glen Allsopp says
I recommend this one very highly:
Take a month long vacation on the opposite side of the world in a city with a completely different culture.
I spent 3 weeks in Vietnam and it was one of the most life-changing times of my life. You realise there is so much more to the world than wherever you are now.
Great list guys, submitted to stumbleupon!
Cheers,
Glen
Marc says
@Dave: Our stand on this issue deals with exactly what you stated… Once you have kids, life is a bit more complicated. Many of these things could be achieved after having children, but we feel it’s much easier to acomplish them ahead of time.
@Glen: Thanks Glen! 😉
Steve Olson says
I haven’t done half this stuff and I already have kids. What should I do now? I know! Do it anyway! Take the little buggers along for the ride.
sevenjobs says
Talk to your friends, enjoy to speak a whole sentence until its end, spend time with your friends, phone as long as you can. These things are IMPOSSIBLE with kids.
dredawg says
Ok all these things SOUND great, and SOME of them are free, but the vast majority involve 2 things that I do not have in abundance, that is money and time.
It must be great for people who live in ivory towers to suggest such lofty things, but get real, unless daddy is rich and is willing to foot the bill the bill, the harse reality is you get a job you hate, a girl you settle on, and rent to pay every goddamn month. Buy a house? are you freakin’ kidding me?
Chris - Zen to Fitness says
Thanks for the list really cool stuff on there!
Living in california is one of my many goals for the next few years…..
Marc says
@Steve Olson: If you have kids already… go for it! 😉 They may slow ya down a little, but it’ll be worth the extra effort.
@sevenjobs: LOL!
@dredawg: That’s a pretty negative take on life. Also, mommy and daddy have nothing to do with it. The freedom to travel involves making your own money and budgeting it appropriately.
ramblinrose says
Life doesn’t end when you have kids! I agree that some of these would be irresponsible to do if you were a parent (the life-threatening ones), but I know tons of people who do amazing, fun things as families.
proofpositivity says
Good luck on the list. A lot of these things I would never do with my kids. Like the bare on a nude beach. Then again, I wouldn’t do it without kids either. 🙂
j-bar03 says
@sevenjobs
You forgot to add having an uninterrupted bath; eating food while it is still hot; just browsing in shops….
I didn’t do most of these things before I had kids but I’m working my way through the list and including them as appropriate.
I really believe that children benefit enormously from being immersed in a different culture. My kids have certainly been further afield than I did at their age.
Ari Koinuma says
Enjoy really loud sex in the middle of the living room! 😉
Lance says
Hey, I did #4 after I had kids – and it was an awesome experience (once I got over the idea of it being a perfectly good airplane).
But I have lots to catch up on if I’m to complete this list – and I’ll have to do it with kids! Do I wish I’d done some of these earlier in life – sure. But, I’m also very happy having these little buggers in my life, and no amount of “I didn’t get to do this…” will ever replace what they mean to me.
So, I’ll continue on – and hopefully get many of these done in my lifetime. It’ll be a great ride, and they may be along for part of it.
Great list, by the way! Several on there sparked an interest for me.
CC says
GREAT list! Alas, I’ve done about 2 of them. 🙁 And I have 2 young kids, so I won’t be doing more of them anytime soon…
LivSimpl.com says
Shouldn’t #37 be required? If you aren’t in love (and in my opinion, married) you shouldn’t be having kids.
That being said, as many have mentioned before, the simple things like taking a relaxing shower, going to the movies on a whim or going on quick weekend getaways are some of the things my wife and I miss the most about life pre-baby.
Marelisa says
Very interesting. I have a squidoo lens on 100 things to do before you die and I have a lot of these on there, although the lens is rated G so there’s obviously some of these that I couldn’t put on there. I think having a bucket list gives you something to look forward to–you get to anticipate checking each item off the list–with or without kids.
Kit says
ROFLMAO !
Clearly a list from yet another person who doesn’t have kids
Have y’all ever noticed the lists of ‘stuff I *should* have done before having kids’ has almost NONE of this on it ?
Clue : these aren’t the things you’ll regret.
You can still do almost ALL of them (it’s *gasp* ok to do some things while Jr is with a sitter !) After Kids, and a good chunk of these have been more fun *with* kids.
Look, either you want kids at some point or not- either way is fine.. but unrealistic lists of years-long projects ? Just say “I don’t want kids, and that’s OK.”
Really. You’ll feel lots better.
ppp says
I guess I won’t be having kids.
Jeff@MySuperChargedLife says
I agree that you should attack as many of these as possible prior to having children. However, having kids is not the end of life. I have two daughters and I am still living, loving, and pursuing adventure!
In fact, I’m taking a scuba certification class this weekend. Maybe I’ll get to dive that wreck that you mention in #7 before long. 🙂
Jessica says
My husband and I have no kids. We can’t afford even one of these things to do with the economy right now.
Zer0kbps says
@Steve Olson, for god sake don’t take the little buggers on items 5 and 10, else the social will be round… 😉
sacher says
Selfish to not have kids Dave? What a load of bull. Wouldn’t it be more selfish to have kids for the sake of having them? Or because people like you pressure people into having kids because it’s apparently “selfish”? I guess it’s also not selfish to add more people to an already overpopulated planet huh? You want to breed like rabbits you go ahead and do that but for others who DON’T want children, don’t feel the need to vilify them just because you’ve lost your freedom.
Dan says
haha 71.) Come up with the money to do half of that cool stuff.
but seriously.. great list. I’ll try checking some of these off in a year!
SKITTLE81654 says
i AM 54 AND I WOULD RETITLE THIS LIST :
70 THINGS TO DO AFTER THE KIDS ARE GROWN.
Paul says
That’s definitely enough to keep someone busy long enough not to even bother having kids. Though some of those can be done even with kids.
J.C. says
Exactly why do children preclude doing any of these things? Also I fail to see how going to a ‘high end’ strip club is any more worthwhile than any strip club – or gambling – why not just buy a bum some booze – at least you’ll have done something positive with the money.
Sara at On Simplicity says
I haven’t done well, hardly any of these, but it’s definitely inspiring! I’m going to run a marathon at some point, and if my husband has his way, we’ll both learn to sail.
I actually enjoyed the audacity of this list. It’s a reminder that for most people, your life experiences are up to you. You just have to stop the excuses and probably sacrifice some other things to make them happen.
ringo starr says
good ideas
too bad we aren’t all made of money
Peter says
Well I already have kids, so as Swiper would say “Oh man!” (You probably have to be a parent to get that reference he he…) I did do a few of these things though – eg Oktoberfest. Nice article.
Hillery says
Great, now I have a kid you tell me…
Seriously, though, this seems like a generic list. A lot of the things on this list I wouldn’t even *want* to do, and the vast majority are perfectly possible even with young children in tow. I think the list should be modified to simply “things to do while you’re still young”. Then a lot of these things are possible right into old age. I guess the only good title for this list really is: Things you should do (if these are the sorts of things that would appeal to you). For the record, though I didn’t think I had accomplished too much in my life yet, I have managed fifteen of the items on the list, and more than a couple of those things I have done since having my daughter.
pfurrie says
#13 should read “Live in” as opposed to “Live is”
zenification says
I’ve done 19 of these. And I’ve used the same picture:) Nice post! I’ll do a few more.
Toblerone from Simple Mom says
I agree with sevenjobs – those things she mentioned are a lot harder to do than some of the 70 on the list! 🙂
Still, it’s a good list. I have kids, and we do a number of them now (live in an urban high-rise in a big city), so I know they can be done. But you’re right – getting things done is a bit more challenging with kids.
Laura says
Keep up the good work. I sent this to my 24 year old daughter who is in London pub hoppping, then off to India for 6 months, then planning to move to NY, has already jumped out of a plane and was just in a pub in Ireland. Spent a summer working and climbiing in Yosemite. She also just finished taking the Transmongolian/Transiberian train from Bejing to Moscow via Mongolia which she says was fabulous. Something you could add to your list.
Maybe I’ll make my own list. What to do after the kids leave home, before you get too old!
Laura
Lightchaser says
Well, I have to say, a lot of the things on this list hardly seem like must-dos to me, whether prior to or after having children. Attend the Tonight Show? Go to a Las Vegas strip club? And worst of all, the patronising “drive through a (somewhat safe) part of a third world country…” Drive through a place to look at how people live in penury. You don’t gain perspective on life by driving through third world countries, dear author/s. You really learn to be grateful when you make an effort to help people who are in tough situations, when you volunteer your time, energy, sympathy and if possible money to make their world a better place.
Pretty superficial list.
Rebecca says
I just recently came across your blog and I’ve been addicted ever since!
I really enjoyed this post. I sent it to my husband at work and asked him when we could get started on it : ) Of course we already have two little ones but I think we could still manage to do some of the stuff. The rest will just have to wait a few years!
Clair Schwan says
It’s a nice list, but many can and should be done with your children. Why not show your children how to live with more life, more culture, and less fear.
I would add two to the list:
-Become mature enough to have children. In other words, have a plan for a happy family. The little rug rats need a good home and a good example to follow.
-Be financially stable to the point where you and your children have options for a full life that is rich with experiences.
One item on the list reminded me of something I did when I was in Thailand on a business trip. I was asked by a nightclub singer to sing on stage with her band – not a bouncing ball Karaoke thing, but just a band behind you and a microphone in your hand.
I sang two American songs, Desperado and San Francisco. I must have done rather well because the nightclub singer left the stage and sat down with her friends at a table during my performances.
What made me take the stage was knowing that if I didn’t seize the opportunity to sing with the band at this nice Thai nightclub, then I would regret it all the way back home on the plane.
Now, wouldn’t something like that be a great thing for your kids to see?
Clair
Marc says
@All: Thanks for keeping the discussion alive. Some of you have brought up some great points, in addition to making wise additions to the list.
@Everyone who says these things can be done even with children: For the most part, I completely agree. If you have kids, I hope you would still get out there and bring the little ones along for the ride. You probably wouldn’t want to hit the risqué bullet points on our list, but I’m sure you have a list of your own anyways. We don’t have children yet, so we are trying to knock off most of these now.
@Everyone who is against my Vegas bullet points: Like I stated earlier, it’s all about life experiences for us. I think true wisdom is the byproduct of life experience. Angel and I attended the Vegas trip together… and she was equally as curious as I was. It was interesting.
@Everyone who said the list is flawed: It’s our list, not yours. It should be somewhat flawed in the eyes of others. I’m sure you have a list of your own that makes a lot more sense to you. Feel free to share your thoughts. I find them to be quite interesting. 😉
Damien Riley says
Great article. Surfed in from Blogrush. “Swim with the sharks” has so many metaphorical meanings does it not? Thanks.
harmzie says
Thanks for this list. It’s a great one – your own! I think the coolest thing about it is that it exists, whatever’s on it.
*Before* I had kids I was rather focussed on the next step: *having* kids. Fortunately we did a few little jaunts before diving right in, but we didn’t sit down & say “hey we should do (a), (b), & (c) before we’re weighted down a little heavier”.
I don’t regret any of it, and many of the things that might have been on my list *are* still possible (as many have said) with our kids, but with my 20/20 hind sight, it would have been nice to *really* relish that time with my dh.
As it is, we really *REALLY* relish those sleepovers to grandma & grandpa’s! 😉
(li’l bit o’ #5, sometimes #9, #57, and always some #37 – all over… as well as completing sentences; picking up toys in a room and have the floor still clear when you turn around!)
boilermaker says
Great list, I’ve done 31 of them after having kids though and over 50 of them total. I don’t think people should limit themselves due to children. They have inspired me to do alot of these things and I hope to share many of these experiences with them as they get older. You should make a new list titled “Things you should experience with your children” lol.
Tabs at Levnow says
Could add about 25% of your list to mine or I should say I already have 25% of your list on mine, a few I have already done, but swimming with sharks No Way!
-Tabs
musicman says
This is a nice article and a nice list, but I think the majority of things on it can’t be done by the average person on an average budget! I know it’s your own list; perhaps I’m just jealous because I’m knee-deep in college loans! : /
In any case, these seem like lovely things to do before I have children – I just wish I had the means!
Thanks for posting : )
Nature says
Yes, go ahead and risk your lives -before- you have children. Better chance that my genetic material outlasts yours.
Karl Staib - Your Happiness Matters says
#16 Surf a Hawaiian wave.
is now on my list.
Great list! I’ve got one…
71 Meditate with a monk on an overlook in the Tibetan mountains.
Matt says
Yeah, you need a very, very large amount of money, and lots of time to do this. The average age of couples having children is 29, so I suppose you’d better be rich or live off mommy and daddy. Shame most of us live in reality.
Toblerone from Simple Mom says
I think the overall feeling I get as a parent, and maybe other previous commenters do, too, is a general feeling of an idea that life is over when kids come around. Sort-of a “soak it up while you can, because you won’t have any more fun once kids are in the picture.” Not just from this post – from the culture at large these days.
I agree with you – it’s your list, so it’s not the universal list for everybody. And thank you for saying that. But I have to say, I guessed before I was even done reading your post that you guys didn’t have kids yet, because it just sounds like it. Ya know? 😉
I’ve done about 10 on your list (and most after I had kids). But if I had to choose finishing my list of must-dos and having kids, I’d choose having kids, hands down. Life doesn’t end when they arrive – a new sort of life starts.
Sara says
Not only would it take years to do all these things, it would also cost a lot of money, which takes even more time to make (in an honest way, at least)…
I’m guessing if I’d have wanted to get these things done before I had children, it would have been too late to experience the most awsome, breathtaking experience of all: becoming and being a mom!
mcgrimus says
A few of these will actually prepare you for parenthood, e.g., swimming with sharks, and spending New Years in Times Square. Learning martial arts might prove helpful as well….