post written by: Marc Chernoff

15 Things Everyone Needs You To Do


Things Everyone Needs You To Do

Dare to reach out your hand into the darkness,
to pull another hand into the light.
-Norman B. Rice

A silhouette of a human being stands before you.

Perhaps a friend.  Perhaps a lover.  Perhaps a perfect stranger.

They need you to connect with them.  They need you to share this moment.

They need you to…

  • Notice without critiquing.
  • Appreciate without comparing.
  • Listen without interruption.
  • Question without objection.
  • Challenge without mocking.
  • Consider without doubting.
  • Discuss without criticizing.
  • Smile without hesitation.
  • Give without expectation.
  • Comfort without lying.
  • Guide without misleading.
  • Forgive without resentment.
  • Rest without judgment.

They need you to be you – just the way you are.

And they need you to respect them – just the way they are.

Photo by: Evan Lane

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22 Comments

  • Comfort without lying is a really good one I’m sometimes guilty of breaking. If you’re just saying what they want to hear instead of telling them the truth, even if they don’t necessarily want to hear it, you’re still helping them far more than lying just so they can feel better in that moment but their problem still isn’t solved.

  • Awesome list!

    It makes me smile without hesitation.

    :-)

  • So true, on all counts…thank you so much for the inspiration. :-)

  • Just found this blog and love the inspirational posts (like the 50 questions to ask yourself). I’m on a 3-month trip through Asia before returning to grad school, and I have a lot of time for introspection. Thanks for providing some interesting topics to ponder!

  • Concise, inspiring and useful :)

    We tend to rush in with our own opinions and solutions, when what is required is our compassionate presence and if asked - appropriate action. I have written a blog post on this at http://serenereflection.wordpress.com/2010/09/15/silence-speaks/ - Silence Speaks.

    Thanks!

  • Would it be great if EVERYONE lived by these simple considerations? Well, I’m going to try and set a good example… nice post! Thank you.

  • Simple and wonderfully insightful as always. “Give without expectation” is one that really resonates with me. In my past relationships I would often do things while expecting something in return. I would get frustrated when my partner didn’t automatically assume to return the favor.

    Now that I’ve matured, I’ve learned to truly give because it makes me feel good and not because I need something. It’s a completely different attitude and I believe it’s extremely important for us to reach that point in all of our relationships. Give just to share your value
    with people, it makes the world a better place.

  • Awesome as always…

    Thank you Marc :)

  • Thanks! So simple and relevant.

  • Perfect!……so succinctly said.
    So true, yet so hard to do.

    And, your last week’s list/post was so good, I copied it to all my colleagues. They all enjoyed it.

  • Short and sweet this time around. But I think the point is clear:

    Be open minded. Be kind. Be your awesome self.

    Thanks for the comments guys and gals! :-)

  • Great list to live by! Each one makes you stop and think. We often forget to do these things due to the craziness of life…thank you for the reminder!

  • I love it! Short, sweet and full of wisdom.

  • Hi Marc

    Thank you for yet another inspiring post. Forgive without resentment is the one that poses a challenge for me. But then if we are resenting the other person, we did not really forgive them. We need to observe our feelings and emotions. Are we really taking responsibility of our lives? We actually lose out for not forgiving. We will achieve and grow more by forgiving others and moving forward.

    Thanks for this short post. It is so insightful.
    Andrea

  • These are little values we forget, ignore, overlook, etc. And yet without them we are lost. I love this.

  • Ah, refreshing! Think about it……when at one point of time we shuttered at the site of a man in full armor wielding a sword. Yet the sword is no where to be found. Now the real men/women wield pens.

    It’s a great list one that should probably be laminated as place mats. In time, it is my hope as I’m sure it is for many others living in these times that the thoughtful phrases written above will eventually set a permanent home in all of our hearts and minds.
    ” It all starts with empathy”
    Thank you for your time Marc on this piece as well as your other work.

  • I love the brevity of this post. True to the core.

  • Wow! I mean this is the most inspiring website on the internet! I am always amazed how each time I read a new post it is just as refreshing as the day it was posted! It seems like Marc will be writing a book one of these days.

  • Another one that may also be added is “Love without reservation.”
    :)

  • Is there a ‘how to’ for each of these? I sure could use one!

  • This short read truly inspired me. Many thanks!

  • Awesome!

    I would add: seize your chances without rumination.

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