It is ultimately only our own thoughts that hurt us.
PLEASE NOTE: This post has been updated and moved to here:
10 Excuses the Mind Will Tell You Before You Take the Next Step
Photo by: Tilly
Practical Tips for Productive Living
It is ultimately only our own thoughts that hurt us.
PLEASE NOTE: This post has been updated and moved to here:
Photo by: Tilly
Robin Lassel says
Thank you for another important post. Now to answer your question…
I’m not sure this directly pertains to the subject of lies, but one thing I frequently observe is people imitating other people’s lives to a T (I used to do the same). They will buy the same things, travel to the same places, even talk like the other one. Many times we think the other person is so happy, and we want that happiness for us, right away. But, sadly, by doing this all we’re doing is diluting ourselves and selling ourselves short of being comfortable and courageous in our own shoes – living our lives our own way.
Bobbi says
Excellent post. I’d like to add a corollary… people lie to and deceive themselves by having an opinion, but convincing themselves not to act on it – because they’re scared or shy or whatever. But there’s a reason for the old saying about opinions: Your opinion in this world is meaningless unless you stand behind it and act on it.
Susan Rae says
Excellent post guys. Every point resonates with me. Some of these I used to struggle with desperately, but over the past few years, after reading your emails, book, and other books you’ve recommended, I’ve made significant progress.
I would add this lie to the list:
Thinking that everyone else knows what they are doing (or at the very least, knows more than you).
So many people believe this, and I was one of them. But it’s not true. Everyone is exploring and/or struggling in their own way. Nobody was handed a manual or an instruction guide – everyone is just figuring it out using their gut instinct, some brain power and a little trial and error. Do not let yourself think otherwise.
Marlen Hernandez says
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts, advice, and experience. It has really helped and inspired me to become the best version of me without depending on somebody else for it. I’m the one who is living my life and I’m the one that can change it if I don’t like the way it’s going. “When there is a will, there is a way.” Also WOW! I share the exact same opinions as Robin, Bobbi and Susan. They have taken words out of my mouth and no need to repeat them. I’m so happy to learn this.
Anne says
Thank you!
Emmanuel Worthwhile says
Awesome article today! I am so inspired by this.
Alejandra says
What a great post! I needed to hear this today! Lately I have been feeling “one time won’t hurt” “I can do it later” “I deserve it” and while some slack might not be fatal, it will affect our results. Keep those great posts coming!
lisa says
Thanks
BlackDiamond says
G’Morning,
I just wanted to express my sincere gratitude for the work that you guys do here on this blog. Your insight, personal development topics and inspirations have been invaluable to me and always seem to come at the optimum time when something challenging is facing me on my journey. The mind is truly a battlefield and with these posts of insight I’m aiming to win the war. To your continued success, Marc and Angel, and blessings to your family.
Joanna says
Thank all so true. We can do anything that interests us enough, if we put our minds to it. A routine in life is also a good start for change. I have recently taken up Art. To my surprise I can paint! Very quirkie, but everyone loves them. This only came about being home bound, recovering from an illness. I think we should all try something new. You will surprise yourself.
Jane says
thank you
Suzanne says
@lisa: good for you!
David Rapp says
I think a couple of other lies are:
It’s safer here.
No one will support this decision/choice/action.
I fall for these all the time. And I hear them more often as I grow older.
Lisa says
thank you
Angelo Limon says
I have to say “One time only” lie, this lie is really tempting like you said, I have a weakness for it!
Nice post.
Susan Embry says
At 71 I have been in a “what do I do next?” crisis, trying to settle for retirement in an unfavorable economy. I am healthy and eager to discover the next best thing besides volunteer work. As a writer and journal professional I have so much still to offer…even for myself. Your steps are an effective push over the edge and I am grateful.
Mathias says
Way to go pointing out pretty much every reason people fail!
These excuses all stem from our minds trying to protect us – it convinces us of these lies so that we’ll avoid any risky behavior that might be dangerous to us (since risk has always gone hand in hand with actual danger during our evolution).
Your mind doesn’t want you to be successful – it wants you to be safe!
Sharon says
Thank you! I think I am my worst enemy when it comes to all of the lies I tell myself. I wasn’t always this way though. I had breast cancer and lost my job and just when I thought my life was back on track, I got cancer again . I seem to be stuck on taking a break and always saying I’m going to start tomorrow. I find an excuse for everything. My Dr says that I’m going through post cancer depression. I’m also the primary care giver for my father and I use that as an excuse saying that things are going to change once I don’t have to do that anymore.
Ruth says
My brain likes to tell me I’m either too old or too young. Too young to take on more responsibility and leadership. Too old to make big changes or take risks. I’m 40.
Betsy says
Another post spot on. For me it is mostly #1, I can’t do it. After much negative self talk, get mad and upset, I turn things around and start talking positively. It really does make a difference. I usually can turn it around, although it does take time and energy. I give it the time and energy now because I am worth it, and yes, I can do it. It may take longer, but it gets done.
Thank you so much.
Upasana says
This list is so amazing! Excuses are for losers – you have to train your mind to not have these negative dialogues and focus on results instead.
Thanks again Marc and Angel!
Elizabeth Scala says
Another great post. Thank you for being so inspirational!
Noel Rosos says
Hi Marc,
As always, spot on with each and every point. I couldn’t help but look back at a time when I made those excuses.
We’ve all been through these excuses because most of us tend to take the easier route and when things aren’t going our way, these excuses come handy.
I really liked this article!
Thanks for sharing.
Michael Gregory II says
I think I sort of giggled to myself when you said, “one won’t hurt.” That’s what I normally say whenever I’m about to watch a television show on Netflix. That, or whenever I want only 1 chip from my bag to satisfy a taste bud…but it’s usually never just 1 chip I’m able to eat.
jen R says
One cannot think their way into acting better but one can act their way into better thinking by doing the next right thing…Honesty, Open-mindedness and Willingness leads to change.
heron says
When you use the word “mind”, i prefer to term “language machine.”
The voice in your head is not something YOU are doing…
it’s something happening TO you.
You have been hijacked by your own language machine
Wake up from the trance of language.
Mary Pugh says
“It’s too cold! I’ll do it in the summer!” – that’s a lie.
RETINA says
Exactly what i needed to hear today … it’s never too late… my life will never be the same again!
Sandy Massone says
The excuse I use that caught me by surprise was “I can do it later.” What I learned is that I have a tendency to be lazy (hard to admit) more than fearful of taking a risk and it was easy to say I’d get around to it. Now, I tend to jump on opportunities and see how they unfold. So far, so good. 🙂
Marc Chernoff says
Thank you for the added insight everyone! Angel and I just finished reading through each of your comments, and we truly appreciate what you’ve shared here. Excellent food for thought, for all of us. 🙂
Ria T says
Your advice is very profound. Thank you. For years I have been going back into my past, trying to find answers as to why I lack confidence. I am a perfectionist too. I struggle with talking to people face to face. Although I have a degree, I can’t get a good job and my current job is so crazy, as I sit in an office ALONE everyday. Because I don’t have work colleagues, I just think about my issues during my work hours. Days go by, as I want to break out of my rut, but can’t. However, reading your blog has given me hope. I am trying to be more positive.
Ritu Chowdhary says
Awesome post – very much liked the lines ” The mind is a wonderful liar and an excuse machine that frequently tries to convince us not to take actions we know are good for us. Why does the mind lie to us and make irrational excuses?
Because the mind wants comfort – that’s why. It’s afraid of discomfort, pressure and change. ”
So true, I shall must say not because am afraid of taking risk, but because of the laziness and comfort level am stuck with what I have. I need to take charge of my life and only I can do that. I keep myself helping with all the excuses listed above. I think a lot but never put in effort and hence have not been regular with the morning walk.
I decide to move out of my comfort zone and do what all I’ve thought of.
Thank you very much for an awesome motivating post, keep writing – you ROCK!!