It’s not about having all the answers – it’s about asking the right questions.
NOTE: This post has been updated with new information and moved to here:
10 Quick Questions that Will Change the Way You Think Today
Photo by: Sylvia Vale
Practical Tips for Productive Living
It’s not about having all the answers – it’s about asking the right questions.
NOTE: This post has been updated with new information and moved to here:
Photo by: Sylvia Vale
Frank says
Great post thank you. 🙂
Valencia Ray, MD says
thank you
J.J. says
🙂
Catty says
The first two really hit home with me. Attitude of gratitude…
I have always said that I am resilient because of the life I have lived. Our experiences are just that… experiences… and they have allowed me the ability to see things from many different perspectives.
BlackDiamond says
Another powerful and insightful post, a great way to add perspective as I purposefully prepare for another week. #5 has been in high rotation for me recently as I have been creating and implementing a massive action plan for my visions, dreams and goals this year. It has been challenging thus far but I’m tackling the tough issues I’ve been avoiding, doing the things that I fear, feeding my faith and challenging and changing my belief system.
The whole process has been an ongoing paradigm shift and although its been uncomfortable the results have really been great with a lot of work still to be done. I thank you both immensely for these mental gems and principles that I’ve been able to add to my journey over the past year.
Kay says
The questions are a great format. They make you go outside of your situation; to think deeply; to believe in an answer. Very nice.
Angelo Limon says
Hi,
Nice Article.
Question 8 resonates the most with me, because I realized that placing lots of expectations on myself or others, doesn’t work for me.
The less I expect from others, the less I get annoyed or mad, because I allow them more freedom to be their selves and not trying to make them someone they are not.
That helps me out. If anyone has problem with that also, try it, works fine!
regards,
Angelo
Christine Rosas says
#5 is huge for me right now. Rigorous self honesty has been a key in my self growth journey.
Before I create an action plan, I make sure I check in with myself. If I feel too much constriction, I sit with it.
This allows me to open up my heart, even just a tad bit, to let in some Light/Love. This way I’m certain my next best step comes from a place of Light and not a reaction out of fear.
Lee says
You can only live your life one day at a time. So, what are you going to do with today?
Emmanuel Worthwhile says
Wonderful article!
Mike says
Thanks for this, it’s just what I needed this Monday morning. I tend toward perfectionism and my inner critic is a nasty bastard sometimes. I’m going to print out your questions and keep them handy.
Mike says
This is just what I needed to read this Monday morning. I tend toward self-focused perfectionism and my inner critic can be a nasty bastard. Your questions are excellent. I’m going to print them and keep them handy. Nicely done.
kathy says
Thank you for another thought provoking set of rules to live by. In my case I feel that I have to ”get out of my own way” and start living the life that I want. I can see it and now have to allow my self to achieve it…even if it means leaving some people behind. The important thing is that I will be chasing the right things for the right reasons! Thank you very much for always making it seem that happiness is possible!!
Judy says
Forgiveness is liberating for your heart and mind. Remember to forgive yourself for bad choices or inappropriate words/behaviors. Apologize sincerely, forgive yourself and make better choices in the future. Forgiveness is a perpetual exercise in letting go and moving forward with a calm heart and mind.
serenity pratt says
THANK YOU SO MUCH! THIS IS JUST WHAT I NEEDED!
I always look forward to your emails. I wish everyone reading this a blessed day.
Pam says
Letting go… I’m carrying guilt that I just can’t let go of for years and I can’t forgive myself
Lindsay says
I’ve been keeping a gratitude journal for 2015 and I’ve noticed a big difference in my positive outlook. Even on the worst possible days, I’ve found things to be thankful for that were positive, including the day my 37 year-old sister died, and the day of her funeral. Even in my darkest moments, it’s even darker for someone else. Even when things seem unbearable, at least I’m still here and have a chance at tomorrow.
Anne Ricci says
Hi Angel, I love your 10 questions. #8 is something I’m constantly working on.
I’ve placed on myself all the expectations (and more) that people have always put on me or that I think they have put on me.
To be honest, these expectations have often served me in the past and are still serving me, so I won’t throw out the baby with the bath water.
But I’ve also noticed that less expectations allow me to enjoy life more and be more present. A fine balance.
KatT says
I wish someone could tell me how to deal with #9 & #4, forgiving and letting go once and for all! Why is it so hard to let go of something or someone when you know it is just hurting yourself & the other person or persons are clueless or don’t even care ? What is it about us that we cling so tightly to past hurts or people that really shouldn’t even be given a second thought ? I am working on this, and I know it isn’t a quick fix but it sure is better than it used to be !
I have been reading your articles for over a year now and they have truly helped me weather a huge storm in my life, so thank you so much! I am so glad I found your blog and have passed it on to many others who are thankful too.
Betsy says
🙂
George says
What a great post, Angel! Thank you!
#5 resonated with me the most. Blaming others is contagious and addictive. Once you start blaming other people for the problem it’s easy to create a snowball effect and always push the blame to others.
Instead of pointing the finger to other people if we just accept what happened and focus on the solution we’ll get through it much quicker and without all the stess!
Inspiring post, Angel!
becky says
I just lost my baby girl. My dad, friend/landlord and dog are all dying; my last job was eliminated in a ‘restructure, my current job is a nightmare, I’m struggling financially and not surprisingly I’m having health issues but can’t afford to see a doctor. This post from you came at just the right time…yet again. I’m definitely grateful for your words of encouragement…
Ruby says
Thank you, great reminders. Your posts are always so invigorating and honest. I love these posts and they help me a lot to move forward in my life. Many thanks!
🙂
Michael Gregory II says
Loved your post and it caused me to think about a few events I went through.
I think what most related to me was number 4. Whenever I think about letting go of a bad characteristic, it’s the desire to want to be perfect. I have a strange concept in my head I have to be intelligent to a certain degree or else I’ll be considered a failure.
I make false assumptions that I have to maintain a certain public image to avoid breaking my world apart. And when events such as failure or disappoint approach me, it’s extremely difficult to accept.
Yolande says
I find it hard to remember to think before I react. It’s exhausting living conscientiously. But it’s worth it in the end.
Steve says
What a wonderful list to think over.
I would add one more: What can I do, right now, to help move me out of whatever mental funk I’m in, and become closer to where I want to be?
An action will help reward and solidify my positive thoughts and prevent me from self criticism of never doing anything.
Suzi says
Many of these things I chose to do after several decades of marriage and my husband’s decision to divorce. I chose that this would not destroy me…it would be another adventure in life. It has been an amazing learning experience! Being an American Red Cross disaster nurse, I chose to go to help as shelter/outreach nurse during the Waldo Canyon fires, about the time my husband was filing. I found that my own loss and hurt filled me with more compassion for those who suffered losses. It turned to be an amazing experience for ME!! Reaching out, embracing hurting people makes my hurts worth something. I’ve been to several national disasters since then and am better equipped, emotionally, to help others. My faith in Jesus carried me through ,and turned these opportunities to reach out and help has become a passion in my heart.
Sabene says
Thank you for this article. Your site is a huge source of inspiration to me and is responsible for a lot of change the way I live my life and my thought processes. I used your questions and practically answered them in my blog: sabenegomes.wordpress.com/2015/03/31/10-questions-that-will-change-the-way-you-think-about-your-problems/
I hope my honesty will serve as some source for inspiration for others to be honest about their struggles and in turn forgiving of themselves.
S x
Leanne says
Wow! I am amazed at this posting. I’m working on quite a few of these STILL . Thank you for these beautiful, thought provoking emails. You are angels amongst us. Will be buying your e-book. God bless you both.
Pete says
Thanks for the amazing post.
Rose Costas says
Thanks Angel for this post. all 10 resonates with me but #9 is the one I think is the hardest for me. It is so easy to forgive others for any mistakes they have made especially to me but I find it very hard or next to impossible to forgive myself for mistakes I have made. I am still living and hanging on to the past because of decisions I have made which at the time seem like the best choice but looking back at it, it might not have been.
I believe I have held myself hostage for years because of those mistakes and for that I can’t seem to get myself unstuck. I need that and will continue to work to release myself by practicing being in the now.
Lorrie Jones, MBSR says
Thank you for such an excellent, thought-provoking article. It speaks to some of the most important qualities to cultivate in one’s life, in a succinct yet impactful way. Feeling inspired, I’ve created the following “list” that I plan to print and keep on my desk as a reminder of the qualities I want to cultivate in my own life:
Gratitude
Choosing happiness
Letting go
Forgiveness
Worthiness
Kindness
Taking responsibility
Being in service
Learning from life
Responding rather than reacting
—Lorrie
abhinav arora says
This is honestly the most helpful self improvement article I have ever read through. It will not change all the circumstances but surely the way I react and my attitude towards life.
Thanks Marc and Angel 🙂
Fiona says
Thank you, l was feeling a bit sorry for myself before l read this and it really made me feel grateful for something l sometimes take for granted which is free healthcare l am so blessed to never have the problem of not being able to afford a doctor as l live in England and we have free healthcare for everyone. My heart went out to Becky after reading about her losing her baby girl and then not being able to afford to see a doctor it made my problems seem so little in comparison to what she is going through l pray she finds the strength to pull through this difficult time.
Brenda merida says
Speaking negativley to myself is a habit I need to break. Someone once told me to look in the mirror as if you were speaking to someone you really care about and tell them how they should feel or handle a situation. The one on expectations that we put on ourselves, once told again: would I expect this from anyone else?
ankit says
I think you summed it up wonderfully.
Thank you.
Respect.
Keep enlightening us with these masterpieces.
Ejike John says
My focus is on point 5. I want to believe that the trade of blame is the characteristic of a mediocre man. Because people like this lack understanding, they find one reason or person to hang their failure on.
Sometimes it is not that they don’t know that they share in the blame, it is just that they look for someone to blame so that they can feel justified and not blame themselves for their failure.
People like this rarely grow because they never learn. But all this can change if they know that it is in accepting responsibility that their eyes are open to where they made mistakes and they can truly learn from the situation and grow.
Angel Chernoff says
To Becky and all who are struggling right now: I feel for you. And I pray for you.
YOU are NOT alone.
Please remember that people and circumstances will occasionally break you down. But if you keep your mind focused, your heart open to love, and continue to put one foot in front of the other, you can recover the pieces, rebuild, and come back much stronger and happier than you ever would have been otherwise. It may be hard to see right now, but this is the truth.
And to everyone else here: Thank you. Your words of wisdom and kindness continue to make our work worth our while. 🙂
Brucelin says
The points in “After thoughts” section, especially the one which says that we don’t have much control on certain events that happen in our life is something that I am understanding these days. I even wrote about this yesterday in my blog lifejottings.org/2015/04/01/to-err-is-human/
But, there are certain things for which we are absolutely in control, and are required to act sensibly e.g choosing a life partner, shifting a job etc. Whatever is not in our control like how somebody else behaves with you, is best handled, when you choose not to worry much about them and resolve within yourself that you are not going to be brought down by them.
Captain Kirk, JW says
Angel…
Thank you for this inspiring – and practical – article.
Because I belong to an international spiritual family, my window seat to the world embraces the landscape of many nations, languages, cultures, and environments. With this global view in mind, I locked on to #2 for the following reason.
Recently, I examined an article centered on developing countries and the countless challenges they experience. For example, tragically, many of the people in these countries are deprived of THREE basic necessities of life…that most of us in the Western lands might take for granted.
Shockingly, more than 3 BILLION human beings on this earth do not have:
1. Clean, Safe Water
2. Healthy Sanitation
3. Adequate Resources for Basic Hygiene.
Considering this disturbing reality, I am truly, fortunate and humbled to have these basic necessities (in abundance), and much more.
Fortunately, global agencies, not-for-profit organizations, national, state, county, local and village communities are united in developing improvements and solutions to this troubling situation. They are making, slow, steady progress, and have a tremendous challenge ahead to implement a universal solution.
I trust that those of us that have these basic life necessities and a better quality of life, will remember those that live in extreme poverty…and yearn for a better, safer, and healthier quality of life.
Mindy Mitchell says
This was so perfect for me today. Happy to have discovered your site and your message.
Mary Kinkead says
I really needed this today….. self reflection using these statements have affected me deeply. Thanks!
Sue Ellen says
Awesome!
You’re always inspiring me…
Did you know that half of my life was influenced by your thoughts and amazing posts over the years?
Thank you.
David Aston says
Brilliant! Thank you for sharing this wonderful piece.