“In elementary school my parents told me it didn’t matter what I did when I grew up, so long as it made me happy. ‘Happiness is the whole point of life,’ my father said. ‘But it doesn’t always come easy. Your mother loves to help people in need, so she became a psychiatric nurse. I love reading, writing and poetry, so I became an English teacher. We both find happiness in the hard work we do each day.’
A few years later when I was in junior high, my sixth-grade homeroom teacher put me in detention for ‘being difficult.’ She went around the classroom and asked each student what they wanted to be when they grew up. When she got to me, I told her I wanted to be happy. She told me I was missing the whole point of the question. I told her she was missing the whole point of life.”
That’s an old parable my grandmother recited to me countless times when I was a kid. I’ve since seen a shortened version of it circulate on social media, oftentimes being falsely attributed to John Lennon, Goldie Hawn, and others. While the internet sleuths seem conflicted over who penned the very first version of the parable, it’s a story that has always stuck with me. Sure it oversimplifies the complexities of happiness, but it makes some good points too. And my grandma’s version has that line about “finding happiness in hard work,” which is a fundamental concept that still resonates deeply with me today.
As adults, Angel and I have spent nearly two decades working one-on-one with hundreds of our coaching clients, book readers, and live event attendees who struggle with variations of that very concept — finding happiness when life demands that we work hard for it. So many of us attach to the expectation that life should be easier than it is. Regardless of what we choose to do “when we grow up,” we subconsciously fantasize that our chosen path will have very few detours, interruptions, and inconveniences. And then we wait around endlessly for things to get easier, as countless good opportunities pass us by.
Whenever you catch yourself stuck in this kind of unproductive cycle, remind yourself…
1. You need to do hard things to be happy in life (and you can).
Yes, you need to do the things most people would rather avoid — the things that make you uncomfortable, that are far easier to run from, that others can’t possibly do for you… the things that make you stronger but also make you question how you’re going to find the strength to push forward.
Why?
Because those hard things ultimately build you up and change your life. They make the difference between existing and living, between knowing the path and walking it, between a lifetime of empty promises to yourself and one filled with purpose, progress, and fulfillment.
The key?
Consistent and passionate daily action!
Learn to believe in your heart that you’re meant to live each day full of passion and purpose — that each and every moment is worthy in its own way. And remind yourself that passion is not something you find in life; it’s something you do. When you want to find the passion and inner strength needed to change your situation, you have to push yourself to step forward.
Many of us are still hopelessly trying to “find our passion” — something that we believe will lead us closer to happiness, success, or the life situation we ultimately want. And I say “hopelessly” primarily because passion can’t really be found. When we say we’re trying to find our passion, it implies that our passion is somehow hiding behind a tree or under a rock somewhere. But that’s far from the truth. The truth is, our passion comes from doing things right. If you’re waiting to somehow “find your passion” somewhere outside yourself, so you finally have a reason to put your whole heart and soul into your life and the changes you need to make, you’ll likely be waiting around for an eternity.
On the other hand, if you’re tired of waiting, and you’d rather live more passionately starting today and experience small positive changes, it’s time to proactively inject passion into the very next thing you do. Think about it:
- When was the last time you sat down and had a conversation with someone nearby, with zero distractions and 100 percent focus?
- When was the last time you exercised and put every bit of effort you could muster into it?
- When was the last time you truly tried — truly tried — to do your very best?
Like most of us, you’re likely putting a halfhearted effort into most of the things you do on a daily basis. Because you’re still waiting. You’re still waiting to “find” something to be passionate about — some magical reason to step into the life you want to create for yourself. But you need to do the exact opposite!
2. Putting your whole heart and soul into ordinary moments is what creates life’s magic.
Going back to when I was a kid again, my grandmother used to tell me, “Stop waiting for better opportunities. The one you have in front of you is the best opportunity.” She also said, “Too often we spend too much time making it perfect in our heads before we ever even do it. Stop waiting for perfection and just do your best with what you have today, and then improve it tomorrow.”
Believe it or not, recent psychological research indirectly reinforces my grandmother’s sentiments. For many years, psychologists believed our minds could directly affect our physical state of being, but never the other way around. Nowadays, however, it is widely documented that our bodies — for example, our momentary facial expressions and body posture — can directly affect our mental state of being too. So while it’s true that we change from the inside out, we also change from the outside in. And you can make this reality work for you. If you want more passion and happiness in your life right now, act accordingly right now.
Put your heart and soul into something!
Not into tomorrow’s opportunities, but into the opportunity right in front of you.
Not into tomorrow’s tasks, but into today’s tasks.
Not into tomorrow’s run, but into today’s run.
Not into tomorrow’s relationships, but into today’s relationships.
Angel and I are certain you have plenty in your life right now that’s worth your time and energy. You have people and circumstances in your life that need you as much as you need them. You have a massive reservoir of potential passion within you, just waiting…
3. Stop waiting — that’s the real lesson here!
It’s not too late, but you do have to get started. In other words, you don’t need to have it all figured out to take the next step. But you do need to take the next step to figure it out. And as you struggle forward, remember, it is far better to be exhausted from taking small steps forward, than it is to be tired of waiting around doing absolutely nothing.
Truth be told, if you wait for “the right time” — if you wait until you feel 100% ready — you will be waiting the rest of your life. Take this to heart right now. Too many people wait too long to live their best lives. They wait all day for 5pm, all week for Friday, all year for the holidays, all their lives for passion and happiness. Don’t be one of them!
Just keep reminding yourself that new paths are made by walking, not waiting. And no, you shouldn’t feel any more confident before you take the next step. Taking the next step is what gradually builds your confidence, and creates progress in life.
Now is the time. It’s your turn!
Just put your heart and soul into what you’ve got right in front of you today…
But before you go, please leave Angel and me a comment below and let us know what you think of this essay. Your feedback is important to us. 🙂
Which one of the points above resonated the most today?
Also, if you haven’t done so already, be sure to sign-up for our free newsletter to receive new articles like this in your inbox each week.
Adebayo says
“Put your heart and soul into something!
Not into tomorrow’s opportunities, but into the opportunity right in front of you.
Not into tomorrow’s tasks, but into today’s tasks.
Not into tomorrow’s run, but into today’s run…”
WOW! A wake-up call for me.
Jab says
Never put things off for tomorrow for what needs to be done today. How beautifully said. God bless you always keep inspiring we all need it.
Azubike Ajuruchi says
Wow! What a Great Eye opener. The time is now! The last point is so Resounding.
N Srinivasa says
First of all thanks for this essay and it is simple easy to follow steps which will help whoever gone through it.
Good work..
Paula Marie campbell says
A truly thoughtful essay .
Very true .
Thought provoking.
One to try and work on each and every day, until mastered.
Very enjoyable essay to read .
Also Very helpful a tool to use in life very mindful
Iris says
Congrats on some really nice words of wisdom. What a very nice article! Seriously.. Well done!
Nb 1) I need to do hard things in life to be happy. This wisdom is what resonated the most for me today.
I am lucky that I’m a pretty happy person. And sure enough I am already doing all those things even though I wasn’t fully aware of how much it created happiness for me. I thought I poured a bit more heart and soul into things cos I’m happy. You helped me realised it is also very much so the other way around.
But atm I am in a transition, a bit outside my comfort zone, so hearing nb 1) in such a fantastic article is actually reassuring too.
Hayley says
I struggle with perfectionism and over this last year or so have made great strides in knowing that good enough is enough. My old ways kept me stuck in a job I hated, waiting for the day that it would feel better, be better, when they would appreciate me more. It never came, I got out, and have never looked back.
One step in front of the other, being happy and grateful for the movement toward building a life that is right for me and not worrying about everything being perfect …. I’ve found my joy in life again.
Your essay resonates with me and where I am now. It adds to my confidence that I’m doing just fine, not perfect, but absolutely fine. I’m moving forward, working things out and finding joy and happiness in everything I do.
Diana says
Marc and Angel
Wow! I was very moved when I read this article today. I could relate to almost everything you wrote especially about finding passion is not something you find, it is what you do. Looking at my life ( 69 might seem old to some) it is all about taking those important steps and doing instead of waiting. “New paths are made by walking not waiting” really inspired me!
I love your work and so glad it came my way thru the hands of God!
Peace and Happiness
Diana
Juan Carlos Arrieta says
This is one of the most powerful, awakening messages I’ve read online recently! The perfect time is now!
Kelly says
Another very encouraging and inspiring blog! I need to work on doing the hard things, because those are what will bring me closer to my goals, relationships and more. I love the quote “passion is not something you find in life; it’s something you do. ” and immediately wrote that into my daily book/planner!
Tori says
Wow! This article spoke volumes to me. I was that person that never went all in on things, always waited for the right time, offer, opportunity to make a move and you boldly reminded me that the right (“perfect”) time is NOW. Your advice aligns with the Bible teachings: I Corinthians 10:23-31, Whatever you do, do it to the glory of GOD and Hebrews 11:1, Now faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen. Thank you for the promptings and sharing your grandmother’s teachings. I am motivated to live life all in and do it Now!
Kaiwan says
“So while it’s true that we change from the inside out, we also change from the outside in.” That really did resonate with me today! It made me realize that, yeah, sometimes even wearing better, smarter clothing makes a difference to your mental state… I’ve usually tried to consciously downplay this, but there is some truth to it. Thanks !
Jim says
Once again, you nailed it! I have been waiting, waiting for something to come down the pike, take my breath away, give me a purpose, I’m not waiting anymore! I have been sitting on an imperfect but great plan for too long.
Barbara says
Number 3 is me all the way. I’ve been waiting on people to do things they say they are going to do and for circumstances to change before I do anything. Here I am today still waiting. I now am going to do what I can do with everything that comes my way and not wait on others.
Victoria Sanchez says
Thank you so much for the perspective. I could put my whole heart and soul into making breakfast and lunch for my children and getting them off to school each day. ut usually I don’t. For instance I woke up tired and grouchy this morning, and I’ve been wrestling the work in front of me. But you know what? You’re sooo right! THESE HARD THINGS ARE NECCESSARY, and they aren’t even that hard really. And when I think of putting my heart and soul into doing it all, it reminds me that I’m actually quite blessed.
Your emails and books never cease to inspire me. Thank you. I’m also looking forward to attending your next think live better conference when you announce it.
Joy says
Thank you for reminding me that my future is now. Not tomorrow or next week or next month. I’ve honestly been putting a couple important things off until “the new year” without acknowledging the simple fact that there’s an upside to getting started sooner.
Lynda Gregory says
God Bless both of you!!! I’ve done and been through some really hard times Looking back I know that those things made me stronger and I learned from them. Thank you for reinforcing that. Also I learned many many years ago that happiness comes from within Your messages are always appreciated and uplifting.
Charles J. Bodden says
I always enjoy reading the information that you two share.
Michael YAP says
Good and practical advice. Something’s very new n profound learning for me here…not new skills but new perspective in looking how to live a happy life.
Passion is something’s…after you put some effort n become good at it.
Barbara Albury says
Don’t wait for the perfect moment. Get started now. Great essay. Barbara
Eve-Lyne Taylor says
Interesting, uplifting article. I am presently having a hard time with living In the moment
T. Ingram says
Thankyou for this most helpful
and inspiring message. These wise words of wisdom.. Putting your heart and soul into ordinary moments creates life’s magic. Passion is something you do not something you find. Stop waiting, start walking . New paths are created by walking not waiting. The opportunity in front of you is good enough. Doing hard things is necessary. It makes us stronger and able to do more…I am blessed and encouraged by what you shared. “T”
saket agarwal says
Superb article
Kathy says
Love it. !
They wait all day for 5pm
all week for Friday
all year for the holidays
all their lives for passion and happiness
Don’t be (stop being) one of them.
So inspiring Thank you!
Jeremiah Matoke says
The hard things when tackled as imperfectly prepared as we are, in the state of uncertainty in which we find ourselves, brings a lot of satisfaction, and happiness, when achieved, as we move along the way improving in each step.
You cannot sit and wait to find your passion, you bump onto it as you tackle the hard stuff and gain and accumulate more interest as you get encouraged by achieving the small steps in your entire plan.
Keep moving , keep improving keep achieving, be happy with every new positive gain, that is life happiness, its hard work.
Thanks Marc and Angel. All points resonate with me very well, here in Kenya.
Sridhar Subba Rao says
Thank you. This is exactly what I am to do in life NOW instead of waiting.
Pete maes says
Very good.i hope everyone gets wiser
Ana says
Great article! I like you, guys! 🙂