PLEASE NOTE: This post has been updated for the New Year and moved to here:
Practical Tips for Productive Living
Written by Marc Chernoff // 48 Comments
PLEASE NOTE: This post has been updated for the New Year and moved to here:
© 2006-2020 Marc and Angel Hack Life
Questions, comments, advertising inquiries? Want to be a guest blogger?
Contact Us: marc [at] marcandangel [dot] com · Privacy Policy
Site design by Brian Gardner
Sara says
thanks for this.
Marc Chernoff says
Glad that quote resonated with you, Sara. Thanks for sharing it.
Helen says
Beautiful. The saddest part of the story is that all the other children, in their attempts to make themselves look “better”, made Skye feel like a failure. This story had a happy ending, but without parents of strong character, Skye might have stayed home and thought herself to be a miserable failure forever. That’s the truly devastating effect of lying.
Amb says
That is the key, to raise children who have the self confidence so they care less of the judgements of their peers.
Graziela de Sousa says
Its really true, we tend to live by appearance and we teach or rather indirectly our children pick these traits from us and continue to also live by appearance. The sad part is we do not realize the damage we are creating in our children 🙁
Gena says
I stand by and express truth because lying sucks the life from you.
Christian says
Beautiful words, as always. Your work never fails to move me in the right directly.
I would only add this, which I did steal from one of Angel’s recent emails:
“Remember, dishonesty is done with both words and silence.”
David Watts says
A simple story with a powerful message – like a parable.
I’m Surrounded by colleagues who lie, cheat and will do anything to impress a new owner.
My problem is – he likes it that way and life is hard.
Anyway – thank you for reinforcing the message that truth and honesty leads to a happy life.
David
Lynda says
I completely agree with this article. Even the truth through omission is not the truth. It is so important to be truthful it is the thing that creates rich and meaningful relationships.
Thank you Marc and Angel for your posts they have a wealth of valuable information for those of us that want to change the way that we think about things and conduct our lives in much healthier ways.
Jeff says
Sadly too much of today’s world is all about “feelings” and not “facts”, so the entire world now supports lies so as to not hurt those with feelings and sensitivities. The world is now built on lies and untruths in pursuit of avoiding the truth and the facts – because most people cannot handle the truth.
Rebecca says
Feelings are not the problem. The collective belief that painful feelings and emotions should be avoided is the problem.
Marc Chernoff says
Well said! I couldn’t agree more.
Kaiah says
sadly, too many people think telling the “truth” is an excuse to hurt someone.
Appu says
This story made me feel food about myself and gave me more strength. Thank you. 🙂
Derasoa Rasolofoniaina says
Thanks you so much for the inspiring story. It tells everything one needs to know about being true to ourselves and others.
Jessica says
Simple story yet a strong message. Am guilty of such. Thank you Marc and Angel for reinforcing the message.
Wayne says
Much of our world is built on lies, from politics to business. And the most ruthless are often the most successful, and that’s the truth.
Tracey says
That’s the truth if ever I heard it! The most ruthless liars never seem to feel any repercussions of their lies…..
sue says
Lovely story…
Lies told to a truthful person, hears only sadness.
The truth told to a liar, hears only criticism.
Kristine says
Wow. This is useful! My estranged daughter has woven “her story” and alienated her siblings as well as both parents, extended family and her own children. Your comment lifts my view a bit. Still love her, but have had to maintain boundaries.
Bobbie A says
I don’t lie – at first because I was so naive it did not occur to me and I had been taught to never lie and later when it did occur to me, I did not want the pressure of having to remember the lies. Later it was sometimes hard to tell the truth, like in the story, but I held onto the truth like it was my integrity I was protecting and it paid off. The one thing I knew was that whether or not people liked me, I had their respect. Everyone knows they can count on me to be honest with them. I guess this is how we were raised, because my sister is the same way.
Kerry says
I personally find people are either aggressively honest or aggressively passive. I can float between the two and neither feel nice. My happy place is when I am assertive speaking my truth quietly and clearly. This allows respect for myself and others.
I would say take a deep breath feel the wobble in your voice and your heart beat faster and speak truthfully. Good luck and God bless and in your endeavor for the truth I will try to do the same. Happy Easter xx
Brains says
I feel more like this is directed to me… for every single time i lie to lure people. I often want to impress and i feel it’s about time that i reveal my true tongue.
Thanks Marc and Angel.
Jacqueline says
I am a sinner saved by grace, and if it wasn’t for Jesus where would i be, we are only responsible for ourselves and i have lied and was found out, and had to deal with the consequences, my parents made it painful to teach me a lesson, ouch……. i work with someone who is a perpetual liar, she is very good at it, but she is sad and lonely, and i am thankful i am not in her shoes, i wouldn’t want her life, we can,t get away from things like this in life, injustice is everywhere, and when they are believed and you can,t prove otherwise that’s what troubles me, i believe God sees and knows and i leave it with him, bullies and liars have ruled me for long enough and made my life a misery but God is making me stronger and wiser and so i think no matter what, i am in a better position than they are and so they don,t win really xxx hope this encourages someone today.
blessings Jacqueline
Heidi Swenson says
Thank you Jacqueline, it did!
Heidi
kris says
Your words really do touch every single cell in me. I know I am not alright but your words gave me dose of clarity. You always make me cry! THANK YOU
Gaelene says
I realized that by lying, I was giving myself the message that it wasn’t okay to be less than perfect; that making mistakes wasn’t permitted.
When I tell the truth, I am accepting of who I am, and where I am in my journey. A rose is beautiful in all phases of its blooming; and so am I.
RLynne says
Dear Dishonest Student,
Please remember that you are enough. What you do is enough. What you have is enough. I know that can be hard to believe and much easier said than done. Once you come to terms with that realization your self love will grow more and more, and the opinions of others will matter less and less.
Danny Daniels says
The truth indeed pays, thanks for the wonderful story. I friends that find it difficult to lie to me also will not say the truth because I told them that I may not believe them again if find out they’re lies. I am yet to figure out ways to handle them.
Nadege says
Permit me say you two are the best… you always hint at the right issues and at the right time. Lies telling is a very bad habit I’ve been trying to fight off my course. The worst part of it is that it keeps piling up as “we” try to bring another one to cover up for the first one. “Honesty the key to happiness “
Brian says
Love it.
Nickolas says
Lying can destroy families and relatinships and often the people lying are so deluded they don’t even see that they’re lying, only whatever mental image they want to believe in and put across. I grew up with this. It’s crazy-making, but after many decades I’ve come to appreciate the crazy in me as a healthy warning sign. The truth about yourself is far more endearing and acceptable to people, and far easier to work with, whatever that truth may be. You can always deal with truth but you can’t deal with lies. And I’ve also learned that love can’t live without truth.
Elva says
I used to know a person who lied, seemingly just because he could, even when there was no need to. For example: he left home at 14 and took care of himself; at age 11 he was cooking in a diner owned and run by his mother; at age 11 he was cooking in a diner owned and run by his father (parents had supposedly divorced earlier). Obviously those three things can’t all be true, therefore maybe none of them is true. There was much more of the same kind of “stretching” of reality, but it would take up way too much time to detail all of it.
What he didn’t realize was that I have a very good memory about the things people tell me about themselves. When people repeatedly tell me self-contradictory bits of their “history”, I weigh all the pieces, and eventually decide that such people cannot be trusted, at all.
If you are tempted to lie, remember that every word from your mouth is figuratively turned into a spot of paint which is used by the listener to build up a big picture of you. It is so much simpler to tell the truth.
Stan says
I learned that if the blunt truth would be hurtful to someone, there is always a kinder truth you can tell. There is good in everything, so it is up to me to find the good in it and dwell on that.
Chris says
Be open with people. Lying never gets very far. If your wrong,just admit that your wrong. Honesty is the best policy. You and Mark have change me in many ways since I have started reading all your articles. I wish I could afford your course that your offering.
Marissa says
🙂
chizoba says
Still another great message. You guys are unstoppable. Full of tremendous and well chosen words. I tell what I call sometimes unavoidable lies which to me look stupid but seems the society pushes one into it. Hence, will make a huge effort to lessen it. Most times not really to impress people because it’s not my type but I feel we’re faced with people who want a specific answer which lures one into giving them the expected response. Have a wonderful Easter!
Chip says
The thing with lies is that once you tell one, you need to keep lying to keep that first lie hidden..and you need to remember what you said (and who you said it to). The truth is SO much easier!
Elizabeth says
I recently kept something from my husband for a long time, for fear that he would be mad at me. When I finally came clean, not only was he not mad, he told me he still loved me and we could work through it.
Sandra says
This wonderfull story made me sobb already halfway through. So many times did I try to impress somebody and therefore twist the truth for a little acknowledgement from people. But I lost all respect and confidence in myself. I’m now trying to follow the path of honesty because, why do we want to impress people who can’t see us for the beautiful person we already are instead of being our truthful self and attract effortlessly valuable people who see and appreciate our wonderful qualities including our imperfections and flaws??
Melissa says
This resonated with me because I have a job interview on Tuesday and on one of the forms that’s needs to be completed prior to the interview it says list all jobs you were fired from. I’ve been fired from two jobs in two years and my confidence is non existent. I’m currently unemployed due to being fired in February and it gives me anxiety whenever I’m in an interview because I never feel good enough for any job and I’m afraid to tell the truth. I don’t want to be seen as a failure.
Manish agarwal says
Honesty is the best policy.
Sidney Faye says
🙂
Graeme Haxton says
I am currently writing on the same topic for my own blog, so this was of particular interest to me. I am a life-long, habitual liar, same thing, just those little lies and for me its mostly just annoying that I do it.
I figured at first, like some many others have alluded to that I was doing it just to impress other people, but then when I thought it through some more, I realised that I never really did anything else to impress other people, so this idea that I was trying to impress people just didn’t make a lot of sense.
Besides I also became aware that few people were ever really fooled by my little lies, so why did I carry on with them?
I’m a ‘perfectionist’, I live in the belief that an ‘ideal person’ is possible and that I have the ability and am somehow obliged to attain that ideal.
It’s me that I am trying to impress and that’s why it is so instinctive and habitual.
I am dealing with my ‘perfectionism’ and accepting that I am simply human, just like everyone else. I’m easing-up on myself and the more I do this, the less I lie.
Peter says
very nice story to be pondered over… I remember a quote saying, “It is better to cry once in saying the truth than laugh thousand times in saying lies”.
Christine says
thanks
Nishigandha Date says
Wow. You are amazing. Thank you for this post
Marc Chernoff says
Angel and I just read through your comments, and we’re truly glad so many of you found value in this short story. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us.
And cheers to the truth!