NOTE: This post has been updated with new information for New Year 2020 and moved to here:
Practical Tips for Productive Living
Written by Marc Chernoff // 42 Comments
NOTE: This post has been updated with new information for New Year 2020 and moved to here:
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Nancy Cline says
🙂
kelvin says
Hi Nancy, in fact M&A have been the blessings to my life and I will always testify that their emails have enhanced me to discover myself. I pray that God grant them with knowledge to help many people like me. Please if you know where I can get their books please inform me +254720861640 email me. I am from Africa -Kenya
Marc Chernoff says
Beautifully said, Nancy! See you in San Diego. 🙂
J.J. says
Thank you
Marc Chernoff says
Thank you for supporting our work, J.J.
Kevin says
Like the other commenters before me have said, this is wonderful.
Catherine says
The story in this post reminds me of a common fallacy about life. So many of us seem to think that the majority of people in life dance through it, problem free, and those who have problems are the exception. They are not. We are not. EVERYONE has deep scars, memories of horrible tragedies, continuing problems. And so we must learn this lesson. We are NOT alone in our pain. We must reach out to others because everyone has their pain we can share and ease for each other.
Lynn ~ Encore Voyage says
Simply, Wow! This is a very powerful post – both the story and the 5 reminders. I’ve saved them to review when I need that little pick me up. Amazing how they apply to people of all ages, in nearly all circumstances. They are particularly appropriate as our traditions change and we find ourselves getting older here on the Voyage. Thanks for sharing! ~ Lynn
Louise says
Love all you both write, you both are my inspiration. Thank you so much.
Rebecca says
My youngest brother was born when I was 17. I tended him a lot when he was young and watched him grow up. At age 4, he was diagnosed with high functioning Autism. At age 14, Crones Disease. On October 30, 2017, Hepatosplenic t-cell Lymphoma. He died three weeks later (last Sunday).
It has broken my heart. I moved back East to be near my Mom and Brother in September. Now, there is talk about my mom moving far away to live with another Brother. I really appreciated this article. I need to be with those who “get” my heartache and understand my loss. I especially liked the reminder that I’m not alone. It’s feels that way because I’m still so new in this city. Loosing my brother when I already felt alone is really hard. I know I need to reach out as that is what will help me through.
Rebecca says
I’m so sorry for your heartbreaking loss. I wish you strength, love and peace as your family transitions. Your beloved brother will always be with you.
Katrien Degraeve says
The question:”What if we woke up tomorrow morning with only the things we were grateful for today?” really is an eye opener! Even if we think we are being grateful, there is still so much more left that we take for granted. It would be a very mind blowing experience if we could actually make that question a reality one day! We would be shell shocked! So let’s all be very very grateful for who and what we have in our lives! And for all the wisdom you, Marc and Angel share with us! Thanks!!!
Happy holidays!
Katrien
LJ says
Number Three and Number Five resonate with me the most. I am struggling with drastic changes in my life and an uncertain future.
I’m so glad I signed up to receive your insight. Thank you.
Liz Roberts says
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Lateefah says
I want my parent and siblings to learn more about loving themselves. It should help them too. How can I.go about it when they don’t have access to internet yet.
Karen says
Absolutely incredible. Praising God for the timing! I share your wisdom and commend your book with all my clients. And things frequently speak straight into the heart of whatever I am facing but this is amazing. My sister (she is my cousin but I moved in with my Aunt & Uncle when I lost my mum as a teenager) died suddenly and tragically on Saturday morning, aged 49, I am not in a great place – this has been invaluable. Thank you
Joanne B. says
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Sonja Norton says
Thank you, this is exactly the reminder I needed today. ??
Karen says
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Rajendra Ishi says
Very good scene in that opening story. Thanks.
Beth says
Loved the story. It helps me realize that the problem I see in my own life could, and should be a whole new beginning. The fact that nothing lasts forever hits home. We all have things to over come, and we all have so very much to be grateful for. Your blogs always give me something to really think about. Thank you very much.
Monica says
I like your posts and all the stuff you share. I try to find strength yet find it so hard to attain. I lost my in January of this year. My boyfriend continues to lie and cheat on me. He’s been no support. My daughter and her child has continued to live with for now a year. She works and I watch my grandson. One of my son’s is in prison. He’s doing good. Says he’s learning better choices for his future.
My youngest son struggles with being very young, early/mid 20’s, divorced, a child, works, pays child support. I have a granddaughter from my son that died. She was adopted out, I haven’t seen her in a few years.
I’ve also lost several loved ones this year. I’m feeling lost, and my desire to keep fighting in dwindling. It feels like All I’m fighting for is loss and heartache. I believe in God. I love too much. Especially the wrong for me kind of men. I feel broken. And thinking of how can I ever find peace without my son living? All the family I have are my children and grandchildren. I’m tired of hurting. Yet, each day, I wake to find another slap in my face at how real life is and in a split second it is taken away. How do you suggest I move forward? How do I? I’m lost.
Sorry for being negative. I’m just asking.
Thank you so much.
D says
I’m so sorry you’re dealing with such difficulties. I’ve certainly had my share. I can tell you the things that help me are reading inspirational books, articles, and blogs (like this one); doing my best to stay in the moment (once I venture into past or future, I have no help there – one way to look at it is that God only exists right here and right now); and to remind myself over and over that I can’t be effective in my life or for anyone else unless I love myself first. That means loving everything – even the darkness that’s there. I’ve realized loving myself is absolutely imperative and has to come before anything else. I’m hearing that you have a lot of love for your children and grandchildren, but don’t forget yourself. Loving yourself may also help you realize you deserve better than what your boyfriend is offering.
Sending you thoughts of peace and love <3
Monica says
Thank you, D. Lord bless you. Huggs <3
Cindy says
All of the points are very important and I appreciate the reminders! For me, point 5 resonates the most and reminds me to be grateful for my everyday blessings. At a very young age I had a medical condition that left me childless. However, I am alive and can share in the joy of my nieces, nephews and others’ children and grandchildren. Through this early disappointment, I discovered the role of “special” aunt, neighbor, co-worker, etc. I admit, some days I forget I have a special role in children and young peoples’ lives. Thank you for reiterating there truly is a miracle in life’s tragedies.
Becky Doane says
Thank you both for your dedication and hard work. I found out a few weeks ago that I have a heart aneurysm and defective bicuspid valve. Tomorrow is my appointment to schedule open heart surgery which has to be done soon. Of course I have been riding the pity train, but this article has inspired me to jump off and be a big girl.
Judy Lerner says
Be thankful for family (& friends) hits me as there is no family. There are 2 members of my family & I have given up. One is not in this country & is extremely self-involved & the other is a nephew who was 2 when my brother passed away. He lives upstate & has been raised by his mother who doesn’t communicate. He is very much like her.I have tried but one can’t maintain a one-sided relationship. It hurts more to be basically ignored by family than to have no family at all. I’m not going to try any longer. I DO have good friends that I’m very thankful for. They say you can’t choose your relatives but you can choose your friends. I AM very thankful for all the good things in my life!
Brad Gamble says
Wow, “this is the beginning” truly struck a chord with me. How everything in life – every situation and every relationship has to come to an end eventually. Appreciate the end of an era, letting it go, so I can make the best of my life that’s presently available to be lived. That ending, is not THE END per se, it’s just my life beginning again in a new era. I think this is so true with relationships in particular where we stay inside a relationship that is not providing or complimenting our ability to live life with a “beginner’s mind”.
Brad
Magda says
After huricane María, I felt devastated inside. I have a joung cat & thought I had made a mistake in agreeing to keep him. I felt that everything around me was suffocating me in many ways. No water, no electricity and my life as I had luved was no longer. I went to luve at my daughter’s and my mother & younger sister came aling. I was with all of them in the same apartment but I felt very linely. It was a feeling of impotence that I wS not able to deal with. Today I read this message. Just now I realuze how vulnerable I am to my own limiting thoughts. Eight months ago I was in control, in acceptabce, and in harmony. This morning I was lost. i hesitated before reading your message, but I did anyway. I feel the present, the belief tha I thought had lost. Thanks for being here when I most needed you. It seems that my feeble vibrations reached your blog with some SOS! Thank you.
Shelly says
Thank you for another timely and amazing post! The point that resonates with me this morning is to anchor myself in the present. This time of year it’s easy to get caught up in the memories, both good and bad, of yesteryear using the holidays as some type of benchmark in my life. But staying in the present and focused on current people and events is where the growth comes from. Not from looking back. So thank you for the perspective check.
Mike Kopp says
Sorry, Jim Morrison, I disagree. This is not the end. It might be your only friend, the end. But for the rest of us, this is the beginning…and point #3 above emphasizes that. Good one!
Lori D says
Thank you for emailing me this article today. It reminds me that I am not alone, when I feel that way so often.
B says
Very insightful reminders for this time of year. My husband has chosen to leave me instead of working on our marriage. I know I must accept my past flaws and wounds, but I do believe in endings and beginnings. A part of me is hurting so bad and another part of me is equipped w/ so much spiritual knowledge that I know everything will be okay. I must face these wounds instead of run away from them. I remind myself daily life can be worse.
Jacqueline says
If i could give you guys a massive complement it has to be… your kindness and well meaning words and also the fact people share their deepest hurts with you, and you leave them with little glimmers of hope, they trust you and feel safe to share their pain with you, and believe me when you have someone to share with, you no longer feel alone, which is more valuable than people think.
So, a huge thank you from me. I need to watch my perspective on life and bring balance into my life, so thank you for sharing with us all again.
with love,
Jacqueline xxxxx
Carol says
🙂
Kayle says
Thank you for giving me so much hope and peace and for making your website free.. You have helped me in ways you don’t even know. Thank you so much, Marc and Angel. You are in my prayers.
Lourdes says
Love you two! You pick me up every time I fall. Amazingly you say the very words I need to hear when I need to hear them. It’s as if God were answering me and guiding me through you every time. You are God’s angels. Keep up good work. God bless you both.
Gary Hancock says
If you are Superstitious might not want to read this.
Points #3 and #5…I was holding my best friends hand when he passed away, my Father. This was in 2009. Since then I have been battling depression and anxiety disorder…not cool when you are Bipolar.
In my life I have been homeless…yup…then came back to have a family and summer home. Graduated college at 50. Neither parent got to know this.
I am bottoming out again and then I had a dream 3 days ago. In the dream I was looking in my parents Celebrity from outside. I was in the passenger seat and my father was in the drivers side. He was dead with his head tilted to the left. We were going backwards in circles around an island or roundabout.
I had this dream at least three times. Don’t sleep well. Only answer I have heard was online. In my words… It stated’ My Father is gone and I should stop dwelling on this. I was doing very well previously and need to get back on track. I am going in circles trying to figure if something could have been different.
The only answer I came up with is Acceptance…this is a must.
If anyone honestly knows what this dream means or of a place for an answer I would like to hear it.
The 3…starting over is where I am at now. The #5 We are contemplating a whole new business and it will involve the whole family. Thank God
Izzy says
Thank you so much guys for the good work you are doing, am a consistent reader of your articles and actually I have to admit that they’ve helped me change alot in my life..keep up the good work and enjoy your holidays.
Doreen says
Hello, you always speak into my life thanks. Like this statement “Every single day we have to accept the fact that things will never go back to how they used to be, and that this ending is really the beginning.” It had been so hard and challenging to me because my life changed, but now I have move on things will never be the same.
Audrie says
In your present response is your greatest power…what a beautiful, concise, meaningful way to sum up a powerful truth. Happy Holidays!
joy says
Thank you for this amazing post, i used to think that if you cannot solve my problems, why share it with you, but as you said “Don’t expect them to solve your problems; just allow them to face your problems with you. Give them permission to stand beside you.” this says it all. Great post. enjoy your holidays