“In elementary school my parents told me it didn’t matter what I did when I grew up, so long as it made me happy. ‘Happiness is the whole point of life,’ my father said. ‘But it doesn’t always come easy. Your mother loves to help people in need, so she became a psychiatric nurse. I love reading, writing and poetry, so I became an English teacher. We both find happiness in the hard work we do each day.’
A few years later when I was in junior high, my sixth-grade homeroom teacher put me in detention for ‘being difficult.’ She went around the classroom and asked each student what they wanted to be when they grew up. When she got to me, I told her I wanted to be happy. She told me I was missing the whole point of the question. I told her she was missing the whole point of life.”
That’s an old parable my grandmother recited to me countless times when I was a kid. I’ve since seen a shortened version of it circulate on social media, oftentimes being falsely attributed to John Lennon, Goldie Hawn, and others. While the internet sleuths seem conflicted over who penned the very first version of the parable, it’s a story that has always stuck with me. Sure it oversimplifies the complexities of happiness, but it makes some good points too. And my grandma’s version has that line about “finding happiness in hard work,” which is a fundamental concept that still resonates deeply with me today.
As adults, Angel and I have spent nearly two decades working one-on-one with hundreds of our coaching clients, book readers, and live event attendees who struggle with variations of that very concept — finding happiness when life demands that we work hard for it. So many of us attach to the expectation that life should be easier than it is. Regardless of what we choose to do “when we grow up,” we subconsciously fantasize that our chosen path will have very few detours, interruptions, and inconveniences. And then we wait around endlessly for things to get easier, as countless good opportunities pass us by.
Whenever you catch yourself stuck in this kind of unproductive cycle, remind yourself…
1. You need to do hard things to be happy in life (and you can).
Yes, you need to do the things most people would rather avoid — the things that make you uncomfortable, that are far easier to run from, that others can’t possibly do for you… the things that make you stronger but also make you question how you’re going to find the strength to push forward.
Why?
Because those hard things ultimately build you up and change your life. They make the difference between existing and living, between knowing the path and walking it, between a lifetime of empty promises to yourself and one filled with purpose, progress, and fulfillment.
The key?
Consistent and passionate daily action!
Learn to believe in your heart that you’re meant to live each day full of passion and purpose — that each and every moment is worthy in its own way. And remind yourself that passion is not something you find in life; it’s something you do. When you want to find the passion and inner strength needed to change your situation, you have to push yourself to step forward.
Many of us are still hopelessly trying to “find our passion” — something that we believe will lead us closer to happiness, success, or the life situation we ultimately want. And I say “hopelessly” primarily because passion can’t really be found. When we say we’re trying to find our passion, it implies that our passion is somehow hiding behind a tree or under a rock somewhere. But that’s far from the truth. The truth is, our passion comes from doing things right. If you’re waiting to somehow “find your passion” somewhere outside yourself, so you finally have a reason to put your whole heart and soul into your life and the changes you need to make, you’ll likely be waiting around for an eternity.
On the other hand, if you’re tired of waiting, and you’d rather live more passionately starting today and experience small positive changes, it’s time to proactively inject passion into the very next thing you do. Think about it:
- When was the last time you sat down and had a conversation with someone nearby, with zero distractions and 100 percent focus?
- When was the last time you exercised and put every bit of effort you could muster into it?
- When was the last time you truly tried — truly tried — to do your very best?
Like most of us, you’re likely putting a halfhearted effort into most of the things you do on a daily basis. Because you’re still waiting. You’re still waiting to “find” something to be passionate about — some magical reason to step into the life you want to create for yourself. But you need to do the exact opposite!
2. Putting your whole heart and soul into ordinary moments is what creates life’s magic.
Going back to when I was a kid again, my grandmother used to tell me, “Stop waiting for better opportunities. The one you have in front of you is the best opportunity.” She also said, “Too often we spend too much time making it perfect in our heads before we ever even do it. Stop waiting for perfection and just do your best with what you have today, and then improve it tomorrow.”
Believe it or not, recent psychological research indirectly reinforces my grandmother’s sentiments. For many years, psychologists believed our minds could directly affect our physical state of being, but never the other way around. Nowadays, however, it is widely documented that our bodies — for example, our momentary facial expressions and body posture — can directly affect our mental state of being too. So while it’s true that we change from the inside out, we also change from the outside in. And you can make this reality work for you. If you want more passion and happiness in your life right now, act accordingly right now.
Put your heart and soul into something!
Not into tomorrow’s opportunities, but into the opportunity right in front of you.
Not into tomorrow’s tasks, but into today’s tasks.
Not into tomorrow’s run, but into today’s run.
Not into tomorrow’s relationships, but into today’s relationships.
Angel and I are certain you have plenty in your life right now that’s worth your time and energy. You have people and circumstances in your life that need you as much as you need them. You have a massive reservoir of potential passion within you, just waiting…
3. Stop waiting — that’s the real lesson here!
It’s not too late, but you do have to get started. In other words, you don’t need to have it all figured out to take the next step. But you do need to take the next step to figure it out. And as you struggle forward, remember, it is far better to be exhausted from taking small steps forward, than it is to be tired of waiting around doing absolutely nothing.
Truth be told, if you wait for “the right time” — if you wait until you feel 100% ready — you will be waiting the rest of your life. Take this to heart right now. Too many people wait too long to live their best lives. They wait all day for 5pm, all week for Friday, all year for the holidays, all their lives for passion and happiness. Don’t be one of them!
Just keep reminding yourself that new paths are made by walking, not waiting. And no, you shouldn’t feel any more confident before you take the next step. Taking the next step is what gradually builds your confidence, and creates progress in life.
Now is the time. It’s your turn!
Just put your heart and soul into what you’ve got right in front of you today…
But before you go, please leave Angel and me a comment below and let us know what you think of this essay. Your feedback is important to us. 🙂
Which one of the points above resonated the most today?
Also, if you haven’t done so already, be sure to sign-up for our free newsletter to receive new articles like this in your inbox each week.
Victoria Sanchez says
Thank you so much for the perspective. I could put my whole heart and soul into making breakfast and lunch for my children and getting them off to school each day. ut usually I don’t. For instance I woke up tired and grouchy this morning, and I’ve been wrestling the work in front of me. But you know what? You’re sooo right! THESE HARD THINGS ARE NECCESSARY, and they aren’t even that hard really. And when I think of putting my heart and soul into doing it all, it reminds me that I’m actually quite blessed.
Your emails and books never cease to inspire me. Thank you. I’m also looking forward to attending your next think live better conference when you announce it.
Ola Olusola says
Great article. what inspired me most is ” to stop waiting for a better opportunity and that the one you have in front of you now is the best opportunity. That’s a great insight.
Toneika says
Great perspective on passion. I agree with this perspective on being passionate and creating happiness in our lives. I also think happiness is determined by our emotions or current circumstances and can be temporary, but Joy is what we should be striving to have on a consistent basis. Joy is not determined by our circumstances or who is in our lives or not. My Joy is in God and knowing I am here for a purpose and everything happens for a reason that leads to a bigger purpose. My decisions matter, my perspective matters, the reason I do things matter, being true to who I am and was created to be matters, following my intuition and Holy Spirit matters to live in passion and purpose. I believe passion comes from doing things we love to do with positive purpose.
Liz says
You are absolutely right. Happiness is fleeting. Joy lasts. Not for nothing does the Book say “the joy of the Lord is my strength”. Though sometimes it’s hard to remember that. But we have to remind ourselves that He never fails us, He is always there.
Kathleen says
I wholeheartedly agree with you that we have a purpose for living in joy and purpose each day as we commit our lives to God and give up our selfish wants that seem out of reach. I’m so grateful to be reminded that all I need is to focus on God’s purpose to be a person who cares and loves the people in my life. May I be a light to others and not so distracted by my difficulties. Thanks for your comment.
Bonnie Peterson says
Love your articles! They are so uplifting and encouraging. Just what I need! My life motto has always been, ” Nothing great was ever accomplished without enthusiasm.”
I think this fits in with what you’re saying. Maybe others think that I haven’t achieved great things but I’ve done small things with passion! My life has been full and I am so grateful.
Chris Hufnagl says
Hi Marc and Angel,
I don’t have a lot of time to write at the moment, but I’ll tell you what resonated with me…one line.
“New paths are made by walking, not waiting.”
‘Nuff said. Gotta get on with the day. Cheers.
Chris
Tammy says
I agree with Chris.
“New paths are made by walking, not waiting.
I make cards..this statement will be on the next one I make.
Anne Palmer says
Liked this post.
Joy says
Thank you for reminding me that my future is now. Not tomorrow or next week or next month. I’ve honestly been putting a couple important things off until “the new year” without acknowledging the simple fact that there’s an upside to getting started sooner.
Barbara says
Number 3 is me all the way. I’ve been waiting on people to do things they say they are going to do and for circumstances to change before I do anything. Here I am today still waiting. I now am going to do what I can do with everything that comes my way and not wait on others.
Kaiwan says
“So while it’s true that we change from the inside out, we also change from the outside in.” That really did resonate with me today! It made me realize that, yeah, sometimes even wearing better, smarter clothing makes a difference to your mental state… I’ve usually tried to consciously downplay this, but there is some truth to it. Thanks !
Jim says
Once again, you nailed it! I have been waiting, waiting for something to come down the pike, take my breath away, give me a purpose, I’m not waiting anymore! I have been sitting on an imperfect but great plan for too long.
Tori says
Wow! This article spoke volumes to me. I was that person that never went all in on things, always waited for the right time, offer, opportunity to make a move and you boldly reminded me that the right (“perfect”) time is NOW. Your advice aligns with the Bible teachings: I Corinthians 10:23-31, Whatever you do, do it to the glory of GOD and Hebrews 11:1, Now faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen. Thank you for the promptings and sharing your grandmother’s teachings. I am motivated to live life all in and do it Now!
Adebayo Ademola says
“Put your heart and soul into something!
Not into tomorrow’s opportunities, but into the opportunity right in front of you.
Not into tomorrow’s tasks, but into today’s tasks.
Not into tomorrow’s run, but into today’s run…”
WOW! A wake-up call for me.
Kelly says
Another very encouraging and inspiring blog! I need to work on doing the hard things, because those are what will bring me closer to my goals, relationships and more. I love the quote “passion is not something you find in life; it’s something you do. ” and immediately wrote that into my daily book/planner!
J says
Excellent! All 3 lessons are great reminders of what we need to keep in mind… especially on the hard days. SOO good!
Jenn B says
This is quite a powerful message today! I can say that I have spent a lot of my life trying to figure out my passion and pinpoint it so I can really go after it. However, when I think of all the different jobs I’ve had, . I am proud of, they are in so many areas, yet they’ve brought joy. When I think of all the hard work I did growing up on a farm, picking vegetables and working at our family market, I had so much satisfaction and filling up five crates of sweetcorn or 2 bushels of tomatoes. It was very fulfilling. At the same time, I loved talking with and meeting the variety of customers who stopped by. I am currently working in a phone center with people who are looking to sell and buy homes. I get joy from just talking to people and interacting and figuring out, What can I do to make their day a little better? What can I do to make someone smile? All along I’ve always enjoyed working with people and working with my hands doing gardening, art, cooking and many other things. I’ve also enjoyed people and wake up every day, knowing that if there’s someway I can make a difference in someone’s life, that’s what makes me feel like I’m fulfilling my passion. And those days where I’m feeling a little worn out, and I don’t give my hundred percent, that’s when I need to be reading things like this to remind me that it’s worth taking that little extra effort. (And maybe I need a little more self-care!) This reminds me a lot of a book called The Compound Effect by Darrin Hardy.
Kathlyn says
My husband has needed total care for the pass 5 years. It has changed me to be a more compassionate and selfless person. The anger I felt at the beginning is gone and I am grateful for time I have with him. Life can change so quickly but to find the strength within yourself is a gift.
Hayley says
I struggle with perfectionism and over this last year or so have made great strides in knowing that good enough is enough. My old ways kept me stuck in a job I hated, waiting for the day that it would feel better, be better, when they would appreciate me more. It never came, I got out, and have never looked back.
One step in front of the other, being happy and grateful for the movement toward building a life that is right for me and not worrying about everything being perfect …. I’ve found my joy in life again.
Your essay resonates with me and where I am now. It adds to my confidence that I’m doing just fine, not perfect, but absolutely fine. I’m moving forward, working things out and finding joy and happiness in everything I do.
Juan Carlos Arrieta says
This is one of the most powerful, awakening messages I’ve read online recently! The perfect time is now!
Diana says
Marc and Angel
Wow! I was very moved when I read this article today. I could relate to almost everything you wrote especially about finding passion is not something you find, it is what you do. Looking at my life ( 69 might seem old to some) it is all about taking those important steps and doing instead of waiting. “New paths are made by walking not waiting” really inspired me!
I love your work and so glad it came my way thru the hands of God!
Peace and Happiness
Diana
Iris says
Congrats on some really nice words of wisdom. What a very nice article! Damn. Well done!
Nb 1) I need to do hard things in life to be happy. This wisdom is what resonated the most for me today.
I am lucky that I’m a pretty happy person. And sure enough I am already doing all those things even though I wasn’t fully aware of how much it created happiness for me. I thought I poured a bit more heart and soul into things cos I’m happy. You helped me realised it is also very much so the other way around.
But atm I am in a transition, a bit outside my comfort zone, so hearing nb 1) in such a fantastic article is actually reassuring too.
Cynthhia says
Loved this article. I feel like I can get started on my passion now. Thank you for all you guys do!!
Janet Komanchuk says
Another wonderful article, thank you! “Seize the moment!”