Opportunities are like sunrises, if we wait too long we miss them.
Too often we waste our time waiting for the ideal path to appear. But it never does of course. Because we forget that paths are made by walking, not waiting. Let this be your wake-up call today!
If you always sit around until you feel 100 percent ready for the journey, you’ll likely be sitting around for the rest of your life. Most of the time you just have to get up and go for it. And no, you shouldn’t feel any more confident before you take the next step. Taking the next step is what gradually builds your confidence.
Today is the day and now is the time! Thus, it’s finally time to admit that…
1. We wait too long to explore the things that call to us.
The world isn’t really as it is, but as we see it, and we all see it differently. So if you spend all your free time following trends and doing what everyone else is doing, you’re missing out. Try things out for yourself — try many things. Explore! See what calls to your soul, or what entices you to step forward, and then go for it. Find out everything you can about it. Find other people who love it too. Don’t waste precious time pretending to like things just because other people do — don’t end up with a bunch of mismatched circumstances in your life. Enjoy what you enjoy, listen to your intuition, and you will end up with more circumstances in your life that make you feel alive.
2. We wait too long to take meaningful action.
Some people wait all day for 5pm, all week for Friday, all year for the next holiday, all their lives for happiness. Don’t be one of them! The world does not owe you a living; you owe the world a life. So stop daydreaming and start DOING things that matter. Take responsibility for your life today — take control! You are important and you are needed. It’s too late to sit around and wait for somebody to do something someday. Someday is now; the somebody the world needs is YOU.
3. We wait too long to trust ourselves with life’s challenges.
Just because you’re struggling doesn’t mean you’re failing. Every great success requires some type of worthy struggle to get there. So give yourself some extra credit along the way. Remind yourself that you’re doing the best you can, and that sometimes it takes an overwhelming series of little breakdowns to have an undeniable breakthrough. When in doubt just take the next small step. Sometimes the smallest step in the right direction ends up being the biggest step of your life. Truly, there’s a time and place for everything and every step is necessary. Just do your best right now, and don’t force what’s not yet supposed to fit into your life. It will happen, when it’s time.
4. We wait too long to appreciate what we have.
Truth be told, we often take for granted the very aspects of our lives that most deserve our presence and gratitude. How often do you pause to appreciate your health, your family, your home, or other seemingly stable fixtures in your life? Remember, nothing in life is fixed or guaranteed forever. Living in the present is a basic notion, but as with most simple things we often find a way to complicate it. So check yourself — there’s nothing complicated about learning to notice and appreciate your life as it’s happening.
5. We wait too long to be kind to others.
When you grow older and you look back on your life, you will inevitably forget a lot of the stuff that seemed so important when you were young. You probably won’t remember what your high school GPA was. You will look at your old classmates on Facebook or Instagram (or some other social network) and wonder why you ever had a crush on that person. And you will have the toughest time remembering why you let certain people from your past get the best of you. But you will never forget the people who were genuinely kind — those who helped when you were hurt, and who loved you even when you felt unlovable. Be that person to others as often as possible. (And as you know, what goes around eventually comes around.)
6. We wait too long to be kind to ourselves.
More likely than not, the first person who caught your eye wasn’t “the one.” And the second, third or fourth probably wasn’t either. You know why? It’s because YOU are the one! Seriously, in your own life it’s important to know how spectacular you are. You really have to look in the mirror and be kind, because what we see in the mirror is often what we see in the world. Our disappointment in others often reflects our disappointment in ourselves. Our acceptance of others often reflects our acceptance of ourselves. Our ability to see potential in others often reflects our ability to see potential in ourselves. Our patience with others often reflects our patience with ourselves. You get the idea — you’ve got to show yourself some love and kindness, first and foremost.
7. We wait too long to embrace the truth.
Too many of us prefer gentle lies to hard truths. But make no mistake, in the end it’s better to be hurt by the truth than comforted by a lie. And lying is a cumulative process, so be careful. What starts as a small, seemingly innocent lie (possibly even with the intention of not hurting anyone) quickly spirals into an mounting false reality. We lie to one another, but even more so we lie to ourselves most often to protect our “oh so fragile” egos. We may even be inclined to lie to ourselves while reading this, not wanting to admit how often we have eluded the truth. (Note: Marc and I discuss this in more detail in the Relationships chapter of “1,000 Little Things Happy, Successful People Do Differently”.)
8. We wait too long to establish healthy boundaries.
Your mind is your private sanctuary; do not allow the negative beliefs of others to occupy it. Your skin is your barrier; do not allow others to get under it. Take good care of your personal boundaries and what you allow yourself to absorb from others. And if someone in your life is constantly being disrespectful‚ call them on it. If things don’t change, you need to limit the amount of time and influence they have in your life. We need people in our lives who challenge us respectfully, so we can see things from new perspectives, but we don’t need to be constantly torn down by those who don’t respect us. Bottom line: Distancing yourself from people who always give you negative vibes is self-care. Stepping back from situations where you feel unappreciated or disrespected is self-care. Choose to honor your feelings and boundaries, gracefully.
9. We wait too long to close old chapters in our lives.
You’re going to mingle with a lot of people in your lifetime. You’re going to have first kisses you feel all the way down to your toes and think “Oh my gosh, I love him,” but really… you loved the kiss. You’re going to meet a friend you think you will know forever, but then something will change and you two will go your separate ways. You’re going to explore different parts of your life with different people who aren’t in it for the long haul, and that isn’t a bad thing. Life is a series of stories, and the way our stories intersect is remarkable. Sometimes people are in our lives for the whole story. Sometimes they are in just a short chapter or two. It takes a brave person to know when that chapter is over, and then to turn the page. Be brave today. And remember that almost every “goodbye” you receive in life sets you up for a new “hello.”
10. We wait too long to accept and flow with life.
Don’t stress over things you can’t change. Live simply. Love generously. Speak truthfully. Work diligently. And even if you fall short, keep going — keep growing. In the end, loving your life is about trusting your intuition, taking chances, losing and finding happiness, cherishing the memories, and learning through experience. It’s a long-term journey. You have to stop worrying, wondering, and doubting every step of the way. Laugh at the confusion, live consciously in the moment, and enjoy your life as it unfolds. You might not end up exactly where you intended to go, but I promise you will eventually arrive precisely where you need to be.
Now it’s your turn…
Yes, it’s your turn to stop waiting and start paying attention to the beauty and practicality of living a more intentional life. But before you go, please leave Marc and me a comment below and let us know what you think of this essay. Your feedback is important to us. 🙂
Which one of the points above resonated the most today?
Finally, if you haven’t done so already, be sure to sign-up for our free newsletter to receive new articles like this in your inbox each week.
Lynn Biegal says
Thank you so much for the supportive emails and essays you share, Marc and Angel. I just love what you have said in this one today! I am going to try to change the way I behave, and try to take some chances that I’ve surely been thinking about for way too long.
Cindy Gehrke says
We wait too long to trust ourselves. I second guess too much.
Wilson Chastity says
We wait to long to recognize how people scam you .but it’s to late about time you realized you start looking back on the red flags you ignored.
Pamela Hetzel says
Thank you, for this letter of love to ourselves. I relate to each of these. This year I decided it is a year of growing in my acceptance if who I am and let go of those who do add any love or value to my Life.
Wakenia says
Thank you for this post, I have been following your blog essays since about 2011 and each form of wisdom has been instrumental to my growth and development throughout the years. Reading your post today encourages me to look within my own life to make a personal decision to live purposefully and intentionally to prevent a future of guilt that could lead to heartache. My mission and desire are to move forward toward a present and future filled with more love and peace… and less lingering regrets and hesitations.
Micki says
I took screen shots and made notes on having boundaries and the final points that start with living more simply. I am so torn in a hard relationship. Trusting my intuition is not easy. I have been greatly deceived and have paid dearly in the past. I also can’t deny that I am deeply unhappy in my life. I cannot change anything but mindset and my choices. Here lies the problem. I don’t trust myself and am afraid on most days.
Thank you for sharing this important article. I need to challenge my ‘stuck’ patterns and be brave, no matter what that looks like in the coming days and weeks.
Arlene says
Me, too! Have lived a lot dominated by fear, and continue to. But, now I know that I can change maybe not some of my fears, but can lessen them, at least. Even small steps turn into bigger steps. “Walk with Fear so one day you will walk without so much Fear!”
Deb says
One of the best books I read in my late 20’s, was “Feel the Fear and do it Anyway” it helped me a lot. As well as “The Power of Positive Thinking” changed my life and I have often referred to the second one throughout my life. Praying you overcome Fear. We all have to struggle with this one. Peace to you.
Duffy f westmoreland says
AMEN
BE says
Hello Marc and Angel,
The paragraph that touches me deeply was number 10. We often wait way too long to accept and flow with life.
At 82, every moment counts even more for me, and I try to appreciate it as often as possible. Life is a gift, as we all know. We better enjoy the ride. Be happy when happiness is present, even if for only a moment sometimes.
Beth says
Marc and Angel, I love this one… I remember years ago when you first started with these great articles I was at my desktop computer reading it and just sat there crying – I am not a crier. The tears just rolled down my cheeks as I realized I was not happy and I needed to make changes in my life. I have worked really hard over the past ten years or so to make those changes… death a parent, separation, moving residences six times, divorce, changing jobs after 17 years!! Whew. But I still remember the tears that day, and know that I am making the changes so I am living my best life, I am not a doormat, I don’t need to put up with disrespect or lies from people, and really search for the people who are kind and supportive with a positive attitude. I am tired of working hard on relationships that I now realize are one-sided. I have done the work and realize that old pain points play a big role in how we act as adults and as you get older if you have not recognized it and begin to deal with it, then life doesn’t get easier. There is only one me on this earth and playing small doesn’t change anyone else’s life for the good. What I realize is the energy spent with those folks who are takers can be spent with someone who is a lot more fun to be around. Make space for the good to come into your life be letting go of the old habits and patterns that you thought you needed to continue because that is what you have always done. Trust your gut, as it is a feeling in your body! Thanks for your excellent work and your vulnerability in all of your sharing!
Patricia Elana Brooks says
Probably number 7 hits the hardest for me. Not only embracing the truth but having the guts to admit the truth. I mean not holding back and excusing behavior because it may hurt our feelings or someone else’s. I think that’s one of the hardest things to do – face and embrace the truth on the daily when you’re going through a hard season. But I’m making progress.
Sandra says
This post/email today resonated with me. Number 8 and 9 – creating and maintaining boundaries in unhealthy relationships and closing the chapter of some parts of my life. I have had to create boundaries with family members that were sucking the life out of me. I constantly tried to build relationships and have them part of my life. Unfortunately, I was the one always giving with little to no return in the relationship. I felt terribly guilty until one day the ‘one thing’ happened that made me realize I couldn’t do this anymore and decided for my own inner well being I had to create a boundary with this person. After doing so, I started to realize that my life and well being was all I can control and it has been happier – although there are times I struggle with the guilt.
I have moved a few times in my life and had friendships end. At first it is hard until I realize that chapter of my life is over and I am on to a new one. Sometimes, it takes a while to create the new one. I am gradually starting to look at all the good in my life and enjoy every moment – especially when I have friends die, unexpectedly.
Thank you again for your emails. I don’t always comment or read them at the time, but read many and take something from each one – even if it is only a reminder.
Marie says
Thank you Sandra for posting. It describes my situation with family that frustratingly comes back to haunt me from time to time, like now! And the friend dying! me too.
When you know someone out there is experiencing the same, you’re somehow less alone.
So, I appreciate your sharing & let’s all keep living, loving & learning together here. Thank you.
Susan Lappin says
Loved your entire essay, so the ones that resonated the most with me were 1, 8, 10. After a 22-year hiatus and at age 72, I moved across the country again to “push Reset”, so I’m a living testimony to choosing to get the most out of life no matter how old you are!
It’s taken me a lifetime of being a caregiver to putting myself first and not feeling guilty for doing so…I’m still a work in progress, so thank you for this list of reminders!
Tess Burton says
We often wait too long to close certain chapters in our life. That resonates deeply right now. I’m certainly struggling to close a few.
Great essay all around too.
M says
I would have to say #9 resonated the most with me because of current situations in my life. I just recently lost one of my best friends, and have struggled to grasp his loss at such a young age (he was 55). Although we went to the same high school, I didn’t know him back then. We became really good friends about 15 years later. As I went through a divorce, he was there for me anytime I wanted. Having him for that short period of my life was exactly who I needed to help me get through. But his loss has also made me realize that I hold myself back. I am looking now to close the door on certain relationships in my life and seek out new ones that will carry me in a better direction.
Bogg says
Just awesome, quotable, relatable!
anne says
I have loved ALL your POSTS/ESSAYS since subscribing. I could add a few too!! Nearly 77 years of living, loving, raising a large family, relocating several times and life’s experiences have taught me much.
Cheers to you both today, and other who leave comments!
David says
6. “We wait too long to be kind to ourselves…
You really have to look in the mirror and be kind, because what we see in the mirror is often what we see in the world. Our disappointment in others often reflects our disappointment in ourselves. Our acceptance of others often reflects our acceptance of ourselves. Our ability to see potential in others often reflects our ability to see potential in ourselves. Our patience with others often reflects our patience with ourselves. You get the idea — you’ve got to show yourself some love and kindness, first and foremost.”
” 10. We wait too long to accept and flow with life.
Don’t stress over things you can’t change. Live simply. Love generously. Speak truthfully. Work diligently. And even if you fall short, keep going — keep growing. In the end, loving your life is about trusting your intuition, taking chances, losing and finding happiness, cherishing the memories, and learning through experience. It’s a long-term journey. Laugh at the confusion, live consciously in the moment, and enjoy your life as it unfolds. You might not end up exactly where you intended to go, but I promise you will eventually arrive precisely where you need to be.”
Remarkable insight and very true as we experience life. There’s a planner and designer and you have shared some of the deeper truths in life, for which I am grateful. Thank you! Hugs.
Gabriella Owusu Gyabea says
Thank you for the words shared. It was very inspiring keep on sharing these words with us
Caroline says
Thank you Marc and Angel for your articles.They are great reminders that should be tucked right up our sleeves and carried along as we live out our daily lives.
Krishna Mohapatra says
The point I resonates most is We wait too long to close old chapters in our lives. Indeed true
Rose says
2 & 6 resonate with me but I take something from all 10.
You two are great.