Marc and Angel Hack Life

Nobody can go back and start a new beginning,
but anyone can start today and make a new ending.
- Maria Robinson

Yesterday is gone and tomorrow is just a figment of the imagination.  So if you think about it, today is the only day you’re alive.  Today is the day that matters the most.

Here’s how to make it memorable:

• Try something totally new. – Variety truly is the spice of life.  You can see or do something a million times, but you can only see or do it for the first time once.  As a result, first time experiences usually leave a reflective mark in our minds for the rest of our lives.  So spice it up!
• Entertain yourself with real-world experiences. – Great memories are the product of interesting life experiences.  So turn off the television (or the computer) and get outdoors.  Interact with the world, appreciate nature, take notice of the simple pleasures life has to offer, and just watch as life unfolds in front of you.
• Work on something that’s meaningful to you. – Engage yourself in a meaningful personal project.  Or pull the trigger on doing something you’ve wanted to do for a long time, but haven’t yet had the resolve to do.  Life is short.  Today is the day to take action.
• Challenge your mind and body. – Learn a new skill.  Be creative.  Build something from the ground up, no matter how small.  Run farther than you’ve ever run before.  Push yourself to the limits!
• Concentrate on less, but give it your best. – Slow down.  Pay close attention to what you’re doing.  Don’t waste time juggling forgettable tasks.  Instead, concentrate on a few things that really matter.  Engage fully in this day.
• Say “yes” to a spontaneous opportunity. – Everything in life can’t be planned.  Some of the greatest opportunities will knock on your door when you least expect them to.  Be flexible, be spontaneous, and just say “yes.”
• Complete an important piece of unfinished business. – Today is a perfect day to finish what you started.  Few feelings are more satisfying than the one you get after an old burden has been lifted off of your shoulders.
• Document your day. – Take lots of pictures.  Keep a journal.  Document your day so you can review it some other day.  Many moons from now, these old photos and journal entries will ignite your recollection of great memories from the past.
• Smile, be positive, and notice what’s right. – Everything that happens in life is neither good nor bad.  It just depends on your perspective.  And no matter how it turns out, it always ends up just the way it should.  Either you succeed or you learn something.  So stay positive, appreciate the pleasant outcomes, and learn from the rest.
• Be authentic.  Be true to yourself. – Judy Garland once said, “Always be a first rate version of yourself, instead of a second rate version of somebody else.”  Live by this statement.  There is no such thing as living a good day in someone else’s shoes.  The only shoes you can occupy are your own.  If you aren’t being yourself, you aren’t truly living… you’re merely existing.  And no day spent in a phony state of mere existence will ever be memorable or worthwhile.
• Actively assist someone in need. – In life, you get what you put in.  When you make a positive impact in someone else’s life, you also make a positive impact in your own life.  Do something that’s greater than you, something that helps someone else to be happy or to suffer less.  I promise, it will be an extremely rewarding experience.  One you’ll likely remember forever.
• Share time with a good friend and experience life together. – Pink Floyd once said, “The memories of a man in his old age are the deeds of a man in his prime.”  There are few things more satisfying than recounting the greatest moments of your life with your closest friends who lived these moments alongside you.
• Make a new friend. – People are interesting creatures, and no two people are exactly alike.  So meet someone new today.  Find out what makes them tick.  They’ll likely open your eyes to fascinating ideas and perspectives.  And you never know, they just might change your life.
• Do something fun and laugh your ass off. – Some of the most memorable moments in your life will be moments spent in laughter.
• Be present.  Be here now. – I purposely left this bullet for last because it perfectly encompasses all of my previous points. – Don’t let your life slip by.  Instead of dwelling on the past, or worrying about the future, just practice being and living in the ‘now.’  Remember, right now is the only moment guaranteed to you.  Right now is life.  Don’t miss it.

And I leave you with this to think about:

We all agree that life is short.  Sooo…

Why do we do so many things we don’t like and like so many things we don’t do?

Photo by: FMC.Nikon.D40

The greatest thing you’ll ever learn
Is to love and be loved in return.
- Natalie Cole

On a chilly October night nine years ago…

I would have preferred not to write to you.  In fact, about a week ago, I put a post-it note on my computer monitor that said, “What would Skyman do?” (Skyman is my cat).  It was supposed to remind me not to do things that Skyman wouldn’t do.

Skyman would just wag his tail or wiggle his little nose, and hope that whoever he’s wagging or wiggling to understands that he’s hungry, or lonely, or in love, or whatever.  But he certainly wouldn’t write a silly love letter to the coolest girl he knows.  Because he can’t form complex thoughts.  And because he’s smart enough not to be so stupid.

This evening, the post-it note fell off of my computer monitor and landed on the floor.  And although post-it notes usually lose their stick after a few days, this one was different.  It was still really sticky and shouldn’t have come unstuck.  And it was light green, which is the color of your eyes.  These were obvious signs I couldn’t ignore.

So I decided to write to you…  To tell you that Hanging by a Moment is a totally awesome song.  That Diet Coke tastes better when you smile.  And that the world seems easier to understand today than it did yesterday.

But still not as easy to understand as two days ago, when a friend and I shared a three scoop 5 & Diner ice cream sundae at midnight.  And decided that some people are like hot fudge and others are like hard candy.  And I don’t remember why we decided that.

But it had something to do with friendship.  And ice cream with two spoons instead of one.  And later that night, after I dropped you off, I wanted to call you to ask whether you preferred hard candy or hot fudge, just to find out whether you’d sigh and giggle simultaneously when I’d ask.  Because that’s what I think you’d do.

I didn’t call you because Skyman wouldn’t do that.  He wouldn’t even know how to dial your phone number.  Because a cat’s paws are not nearly as dexterous as human hands.  Which must be nice for Skyman, because love is a lot simpler when you have paws.

Anyway, it’s midnight again.  And I’m sitting up in bed with my laptop thinking about how our lives begin and end in the time it takes the universe to blink.  Which isn’t too long.  But long enough for letters that aren’t too long.  Letters that ramble instead of saying what they want to say.  Which is…

I wish you were here.  Just breathing beside me.

Photo by: Kliefi

This guest post was written by Alex Fayle, author of Someday Syndrome.

When I was seven years old, I won a foot race in last place.

An Outsider

Due to foul play at other schools, the local school district enacts a mandatory policy during recess hours that segregates the schoolyard based on gender.  Boys and girls are no longer allowed to partake in activities together.  Given that my friends are almost all girls, I feel lost.  I’m not rough and tough enough to feel comfortable with the boys, and yet my gender excludes me from hanging with my friends, the girls.

So I learn to be an outsider.  I have a couple acquaintances in both camps, but I’m not actively a part of either, at least not anymore.  And because I’m an outsider, I quickly become the object of teasing.  Every tribe picks a walking, talking target of ridicule and I fall easily into this role.

With Oneself

Although the words hurt, I find strength from within to push forward, to stay who I am.  Because my parents instilled love and patience in my mind from the time I was born.  They taught me that the only valid competition is with oneself.  So I don’t mind being me.  I just wish everyone else would learn to accept me as I am.

To add to my exclusion, I’m fairly clumsy and athletically awkward.  I can’t pull my limbs together in a coordinated manner to lift myself over the high-jump bar, to propel my body through the air for the triple-jump, or to pump my legs fast enough along the race track.

I’m never in last place, but because of my outsider status, the majority of the students spew words of ridicule at me anyways.  The other outsiders – the poor, malnourished students who wear tattered clothes to school, or the ones with physical disabilities – they get verbally harassed too.  And although they never say a word about it, I can see the pain and frustration in their eyes.  It hurts them just as much, if not more, than it hurts me.

The First Time

As the teachers group the boys together for the weekly 100 yard dash, I decide it’s time for an outsider to win for once.

In the eyes of my classmates, I’m already the loser.  Regardless of whether I come in first place or last, they will mock me.  I realize I have nothing to lose and everything to gain.  So I purposely run slow and let everyone pass me, even the poor boy whose ribs show through his skin, whose track and field clothes are the same as his day-to-day clothes… the one whose always in last place.

From my position just behind him, I see the teachers cheering him on.  Then suddenly, and surprisingly, some of the students join in.  I make an effort to seem like I’m pushing myself while actually falling back more and more.  And before long, all the students are cheering him on.  “You got it!” they chant.  “You’re almost there!”

The boy crosses the finish line and looks back at me.  He has a smile on his face stretching from one end of the schoolyard to the other.  It’s the first time he’s not in last place.

I pant across the finish line and receive the usual jeers, but I smile too.  Because today I learned how to win in a way many of my classmates will never understand.

I may have finished in last place.

But I won the race.

Alex Fayle, of Someday Syndrome, is a former procrastinator who uses his visionary ability to uncover hidden patterns and help you break the procrastination obstacle so that you can finally find freedom and start living the life you desire.

Photo by: Lekke

With an impending 28th birthday on my mind, I spent some quiet time this evening reflecting on my recent past.  And I’ve come to realize that my 20’s taught me a lot about life.  So, I figured I’d share a few lessons I’ve learned along the way.

1. If you’re smiling right now, you’re doing something right.
2. It’s not so much what you say that counts, it’ how you make people feel.
3. The biggest mistake you can make is doing nothing because you’re scared to make a mistake.
4. No matter how it turns out, it always ends up just the way it should be.  Either you succeed or you learn something.  Win-Win.
5. Freedom is the greatest gift.  Self-sufficiency is the greatest freedom.
6. If you catch yourself working hard and loving every minute of it, don’t stop.  You’re on to something big.  Because hard work ain’t hard when you concentrate on your passions.
7. It’s not about getting a chance, it’s about taking a chance.  You’ll rarely be 100% sure it will work.  But you can always be 100% sure doing nothing won’t work.  Sometimes you just have to go for it!
8. Complaining is like slapping yourself for slapping yourself.  It doesn’t solve the problem, it just hurts you more.
9. The one with nothing to hide is always the one left standing tall.
10. You can press forward long after you can’t.  It’s just a matter of wanting it bad enough.
11. There’s a big difference between knowing and doing.  Knowledge is basically useless without action.
12. In work and business, when they need you more than you need them, you have succeeded.
13. Everything that happens in life is neither good nor bad.  It just depends on your perspective.
14. We are all weird.  And life is weird.  And when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we call it love.
15. True friendship and true love do sustain the tests of distance and time.
16. You can’t change who you are.  You can only change what you know and how you apply this knowledge.
17. It is okay to be angry.  It is never okay to be cruel.
18. Even when you feel like you have nothing, someone else likely has far less.  Find them and help them.  You’ll see why.
19. Having a thousand credentials on the wall will not make you a decent human being.  But genuinely helping one person everyday will.
20. Remember, change happens for a reason.  Roll with it.  It won’t be easy, but it will be worth it.

And I leave you with this question:

How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are?

Photo by: Nattu

The Girl

She has dirty blond hair, a seductive smile, and the most engaging set of hazel green eyes I’ve ever seen.  It’s the kind of engaging I can’t ignore… the kind that makes me want to engage too.  Because she’s mysterious.  And I’m curious.  And I need to know more.

Yet, I do my best to avoid making eye contact.  So I stare down at the pool table and pretend to study my opponent’s next move.  But only long enough for her to look the other way, so I can once again catch a glimpse of magnificence.

I do this, not because she intimidates me, but because I think she may be the girl Chad met last night.  A wild night that, he said, “involved two bottles of port wine, chocolate cake, and sweaty bed sheets.”

Then, just as her eyes unexpectedly meet mine, my opponent groans, “It’s been your turn for like five minutes.  Ya planning on going sometime today?”  And she walks gracefully away.

So I continue to wonder… “Is she the port wine and chocolate cake girl?  Gosh, she doesn’t look like that kind of girl.”  But I don’t wonder too long because Chad enters the room and says, “Marc, there’s someone I want you to meet.”  So I follow him into the kitchen and we bump right into her.  “Oh, Angel,” Chad says.  “This is my buddy, Marc.”

And I smile ear to ear and chuckle…

Because she’s not the port wine and chocolate cake girl.  But also because I spent the last twenty minutes thinking about the port wine, and the chocolate cake, and the sweaty bed sheets.

The Dance

Hours later, the party begins winding down.  But the band is still playing, the two painters who have been painting a wall mural all evening are still painting, and Angel and I are still dancing.

“Are you tired?” I ask.

“No,” Angel says.  “Dancing is my outlet.  When I dance, I transcend myself and the doubts that sometimes prevent me from being me.  This evening has been enchanting, just dancing with you and being me.”

So I twirl her around.  And the drummer keeps drumming.  The guitarist keeps strumming.  The singer keeps singing.  The painters keep painting.  And now we’re the only ones dancing.

As we continue to dance, she says, “I feel as if we’re naked.  And not just you and me, but the drummer, the guitarist, the singer, and the painters too.  Everyone left in this room is naked… naked and free.”

I smile and tell her that I agree.  “We are naked.  We are free.”

As I know we don’t have to take our clothes off to be naked.  Because moments of passion flow into each other like port wine flows into chocolate cake.  And if we let them, these moments can expose us completely, and continuously.  And create climaxes that don’t even require sex.

Because a true climax has little to do with orgasm, and everything to do with passion, love, and devotion.  In the same way, nakedness has little to do with how much clothing one wears, and everything to do with one’s awareness in a given moment of time…  An unfettered awareness that frees their mind and allows them to truly live the moment for all it’s worth.

The Climax

After a few more songs, Angel asks if I’d like to join her out on the front porch where it’s quieter.  “Just so we can talk about life,” she says.

I give her a little wink.  “I love life in this crazy world!  It is crazy, isn’t it?”

She smiles.  “Yeah, a world in which we can be naked with our clothes on and experience continuous climax without intercourse.”

“Because instead we can achieve both with music, or paint, or dance, or any form of avid self-expression,” I add.

“You got it.  Even the sincerity in this conversation is beginning to work for me,” she says as we step out the front door and into the moonlight.

Photo by: Grazie

This guest post was written by Tehseen, the author of Recharge Your Mind.

Happiness is simply a state of mind.  No, I’m not implying that we can instantly heal the pain of a severe or unexpected personal tragedy just by thinking about being happy.  Rather, I am referring to our levels of happiness on routine days when things in our lives are close to normal.  In these neutral times, when we are neither ecstatic nor extremely sad, the slightest change in attitude can swing our happiness balance drastically in either a positive or negative direction. One of the primary factors that affect our attitude is our choice of words.

Words have a lot of power and influence on both the speaker and the listener.  When we speak we sometimes unintentionally choose words that have a negative undertone.  This can make us seem unhappy (and negative) in the eyes of others.  Even worse, after we have spoken these words our unconscious mind starts believing in them.  “If this is what came out of my mouth, it must be the way I truly feel.”

However, this is not always true.  The first fleeting words that come to mind are not necessarily the most accurate representation of our feelings and intentions.  We must realize that we have the power to choose the words we use, and if we pick them carefully, they can change the way we feel.

Here are three typical scenarios where positive language can inject positivity and happiness into our lives.

Inject Happiness into Casual Communication

Typically, when I ask someone “How are you?” they reply, “I’m fine” or “I’m okay.”  But one lazy Monday afternoon last month a new colleague of mine replied, “Oh, I am fabulous!”  It made me smile, so I asked him what was making him feel so fabulous and he said, “I’m healthy, my family is healthy, and we live in a free country.  So I don’t have any reason not to be happy.”  The difference was simply his attitude and his choice of words.  He wasn’t necessarily any better off than anyone else, but he seemed twenty times happier.

It really struck a chord with me.  Suddenly I realized that I have a choice.  I can either say “the glass is half empty” or “the glass is half full.”  Why not rejoice in the fact that, thankfully, I don’t have anything to be terribly upset about.

So now when someone asks me how I am doing, I say “I’m doing wonderful!” or “Everything is awesome!” or something similar that reflects a positive, happy mood.  Since I’ve made a regular habit of doing this, multiple friends and acquaintances have noticed a positive change in my attitude.  And I do genuinely feel happier.  Also, it seems like the people around me are smiling more now too.  So I guess it’s contagious.

Keep Friendly Discussions Friendly

We’ve all been involved in friendly discussions that turn into heated arguments.  This usually results in a complete breakdown of productive communication.  The reason for this is simple.  When people get into heated arguments they get unhappy, and unhappy people are not productive.  More often than not these arguments transpire due to our choice of words rather than our point of views. If communicated peacefully and appropriately people usually tolerate each other’s perspectives pretty well.  Hence, it’s very important to choose our words wisely even when we strongly disagree with someone.

• Instead of telling the other person “You always…” try saying “Sometimes you…”.
• Instead of saying “That’s not true,” try saying “I don’t think I completely understand your point of view.”
• Instead of telling your friend “I don’t want to go to that bar,” you can say “Oh, we can go to that bar too if you want, but I would rather…”

Using words that make the other person feel negated always creates negativity in conversations.  On the other hand, choosing words that assure the listeners that their perspectives are being respected drastically improves the chances of getting your point across without heating things up.

Wendell Johnson once said:

Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use.

Maintain a Hopeful Outlook

When we are talking or thinking about ourselves we are typically the least careful with our choice of words.  We assume that there are no restrictions on what to say or how to think about our own person.  In some situations this might be true, but the positivity or negativity of our words and thoughts still affect us.

For example, there is a huge difference between saying “I wish I have a house that big someday” versus “It would be great to have a house that big someday.”  The latter gives a greater sense of possibility and confidence which allows us to believe that ‘yes’ it is possible and ‘yes’ it could happen one day.  Whereas, using words like ‘I wish’ makes it seem unreachable and impossible, which generally leads to feelings of discontentment.

Conclusion

These are just some simple examples that illustrate how important it is to choose and use positive words.  Remember, our words transparently coincide with our mindset.  Positive language creates a healthy balance between our mind and our heart.

Tehseen Baweja writes about creativity, productivity and personal growth.  If you are looking for some tips, check out his blog at RechargeYourMind.com.

Photo by: Greekadman

In the summer of 1997, at the age of fifteen, I learned a valuable life lesson.

And I learned it the hard way.

Leave It There For Now

“Go deep!” Roger shouts.  I sprint as fast as I can, but not fast enough.  The football flies over my head, bounces off the ground, and takes a massive leap over the schoolyard’s fence.  It lands in private property on the opposite side.

“Ahh… jeez!” I yelp.  “That’s the witch lady’s yard!  You’re going to go get that!”

“No I’m not!” Roger insists.  “I had to deal with that freak last week.  So this time it’s your turn.”

“Man, she creeps me out!  The way she speaks… and that hairy mole on her nose… yuck.  I don’t feel like dealing with her.  It’s my football, and I’d rather just leave it there for now and get it later.”

“Fair enough, I’m ready to do something else anyway,” Roger replies.  “Let’s head over to the arcade.  I wouldn’t mind whooping your butt in a few rounds of Street Fighter.”

“Hah, you wish!  I’ll destroy you, but not today.  I promised my mom I wouldn’t leave the schoolyard.”

Roger rolls his eyes.  “Dude, you’re such a goody-goody.  The arcade is practically across the street.  We’ll be back here long before your mom comes looking for us.”

I think for a second.  “Well… alright, screw it.  Let’s go.”

We jump on our bikes and peddle off to the arcade.

It’s Too Late

Thirty minutes later, Roger is begging for mercy.  “Ah, today is just your lucky day,” he gripes.  “Don’t let it get to your head.”

I chuckle.  “Yeah, yeah… I didn’t say a word.  But we do need to get back to the schoolyard so I can get my football.”

We jump back on our bikes, peddle to the crosswalk, and wait for the ‘walk’ signal.  “Okay, ‘walk,’ we’re good!  Last one to the witch’s house is a rotten egg!” Roger shouts.  I have about a six foot head start on him, so I begin peddling as fast as I can.

“No Marc!  Watch out!” Roger squeals in a panic.  I look up just in time to see a black car speeding directly at me through the red light.  I leap from my bike.  But it’s too late.

My lanky fifteen year old body smashes into the windshield, flips lifelessly over the roof of the car, and strikes the concrete with a sickening thud.

Barely conscious, bloody, and broken.

I vaguely hear Roger’s voice crying for help over the sound of screeching tires… as the black car speeds away from the scene of the accident.

He’s Our Guardian Angel

I open my eyes slowly and my vision gradually comes into focus.  “Hey honey,” my mom says.

“Where am I?”

“You’re in the hospital, dear.  But the surgeon said you’re going to be just fine.”

“Surgery?”

“It’s okay, you’ve already been through surgery in the ER,” my mom replies as she grasps my hand.  “You cracked four of your ribs, which punctured your lungs.  But they went in and stitched you back together.”

“That…  That…”  My mom interrupts me as tears begin rolling down her cheeks.

“We just need to be grateful… because you were barely breathing, honey.  The surgeon said your lungs were filled with blood.  He said it could have been a lot worse had the ambulance not gotten to you in time.”

“That car… that black car… it ran the red light,” I whisper restlessly.

“Shhh… It’s okay,” my mom reassures me.  “The same wonderful man that called the ambulance also called the police with the license plate number of the black car.  The driver was drunk.  It was a hit and run.  But the police already have him in custody.”

“Do you know who made the calls?”

My mom reaches into her jeans pocket, pulls out a post-it note, and holds it up so I can read it.  “Chris Evans – 305-555-8362” is written in red ink.  “Chris Evans,” my mom says as she takes a deep breath.  “Whoever he is, he’s our guardian angel.”

“How’d you get his name and number?”

“I asked the paramedics for it.  They told me they weren’t supposed to give out this kind of information, but I begged,” my mom says.  “I told them I needed to know who saved my baby’s life.”

“Have you called him?”

“Yeah, but he doesn’t answer my calls.  It rings four times and goes straight to a voicemail beep.  There’s not even a voice greeting.  I’ve already left three messages over the last forty-eight hours.  But he hasn’t called me back, and I suspect he may never.”

How Do You Know?

Six months later, after a grueling recovery process, my doctor finally gives me the nod to partake in regular physical activity again.  Roger and I jump at the chance to toss his new Nerf football around at the schoolyard.

“Go deep!” Roger shouts.

“Not yet, dude.  I’m still not 100%.  My doctor says I need to ease into it slowly.  Cool?”

Roger smiles.  “Yeah, of course, bro.  My bad, I didn’t mean to…”  He is suddenly interrupted.

“Marc!  Marc Andrew something!” a raspy female voice hollers from behind us.  Roger and I turn around and are shocked to see the witch lady peeking her head over the schoolyard’s fence.  “I believe this belongs to you.”  She holds up an old football and tosses it towards me.  The ball bounces across the ground and rolls up to my feet.  Sure enough, it’s the ball I left on her property the day of the accident.

“Thanks, but… how… how do you know my name?  And my middle name?” I ask.

“About six months ago, your mom left me a few voicemail messages.  My name is Chris Evans,” she says.

Photo by: Yuga

This guest post was written by Glen Allsopp, the author of PluginID.

About a year ago, I feared I would struggle to build an audience for my new personal development website.  My fear was solely based on the fact that I had just turned 19.  I simply assumed most people would question my age, and thus, my advice.  After all, I haven’t lived as long as many of you who are reading this right now.

I did, however, manage to break my own limiting beliefs by sharing quality information and using my fresh personal experiences to my advantage.  Just last week a friend from the speakers club I go to came up to me and said, “I love your website, but how do you do it?  Where do you get all of your insight from?  I’m 40 and I haven’t even come to some of these realizations yet.”

At the time, I had to give a quick answer and it probably wasn’t the best advice.  However, now that I’ve had more time to think about it, there are certain principles I follow that have allowed me to generate loads of new ideas and insights in a relatively short timeframe.  I’ve come to realize that ideas don’t tend to just ‘come’ to me, but instead there are clear-cut actions I take to produce them.

For a little boost of creativity and insight, follow these 5 steps.

Think Before You Sleep

Although you may not be aware of it it, even when you’re sleeping your brain continues to process and evaluate your ideas and thoughts.  Throughout history, famous figures like Napoleon have stated that they focus on their problems just before they sleep, and tend to have an answer when they wake up.

As soon as I read about this, I instantly remembered how many times I had solved an issue of mine just minutes after waking up.  The stresses of our daily routine can sometimes get in the way of our creativity, but if we focus on our thoughts, ideas, and insights minutes before bedtime, our subconscious mind will ponder it all while we rest.

Don’t Let Your Beliefs Limit You

I thoroughly believe that at times we stall on executing excellent ideas and solutions simply because we think they are too obvious or too easy.  We think about it too much and convince ourselves that it’s silly or not worth it.  At other times we doubt the fact that we are even capable of coming up with good ideas nobody else has thought of yet.

If you let your beliefs limit you, like I almost did by telling myself that I was too young, then these beliefs will always hold you back.  Realize that you are a unique person with the ability to create and conjure ideas that no human has had before you.

Read Relevant Books

Truth be told, I’ve never been a big reader… at least not until the last year or so.  In the last 12 months I’ve probably read more books than I did during the previous 18 years of my life.  So it’s no coincidence that I’m now coming up with more practical insights than I had in the past.

It’s been said that you can become very knowledgeable about something just by reading 3 quality books on the subject.  Of course, it also helps if you concentrate on reading books that pertain to subjects you have an interest in.  If you enjoy personal development, then two books I highly recommend are Psycho-Cybernetics by Maxwell Maltz and The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle.

Remember, humans have been around for thousands of years.  There’s lots of excellent information out there to digest.

Take and Review Notes

I think this is the most important habit of all.  Think of a book or great article that you read in the last year.  My guess is that you can remember some of the key points, but you’ve probably also completely forgotten numerous pages of useful information.  Whenever I read a quality book, I either take notes at the time or go back through it and highlight my favorite points.  I then review these points regularly until I have them ingrained in my mind.

This doesn’t apply to reading only.  You’ll probably find that some of your best ideas come when you are doing something completely unrelated to the idea itself.  In such cases, it’s wise to carry a small notebook or smart phone around with you so you can record your ideas on the go.

My Google Docs account is literally flooded with high quality notes from a number of my favorite authors and my own personal experiences.  I tend to look through these notes when I need inspiration or just to refresh my memory.

Maintain an Open Mind to New Information

If you adopt the position that you know everything about a subject then you’ll obviously never come up with any new insights about it.  Additionally, if you are too shortsighted to see that some of your current beliefs may be mistaken, then you are completely inhibiting your peronal growth potential.

Instead, be open-minded and realize that there will always be more for you to learn.  Of course, you don’t have to accept every new piece of information that comes your way, but at least evaluate it properly before discarding it.

Conclusion

I believe everyone, regardless of age or background, can come up with new ideas and excellent insights.  You just need to know how to harness them.

Glen Allsopp writes for a blog called PluginID on the subject of personal development.  He also teaches people how they can be who they want to be through personality development.

Photo by: Stephen Poff

The subject of her email reads “CRISIS.”  I could tell she hastily wrote it in a state of desperation, since it’s filled with misspellings, flighty run-on sentences, and profanity.  A premise of self-doubt bleeds from every single line.  All of which caught me off-guard, because it isn’t like her to be so pessimistic.

Lost at 25

Like most college freshman, she wasn’t sure what she wanted to do with her life.  But during our sophomore year, she developed a love for mathematics and chose her major accordingly.  She scored so well in her undergraduate math classes that the university offered her a full scholarship to their master’s degree program.  She gladly accepted.  And just last year, while working as an assistant math professor, she decided to pursue her Ph.D.

She told me she loved her work.  She actually used the phrase “life is good” last time I saw her.  I remember this because it made me smile.  But that was 4 months ago… and apparently things have changed since then.

Now she says she wasted 6 years of her life.  Because she doesn’t want to be a mathematician anymore.  But she doesn’t know what she wants.  She just says she feels alone, confused, and lost at 25.

I Stay Silent

I meet her at a local pub.  There’s already an empty cocktail glass on the bar in front of her.  And she has dark bags under her glassy eyes.  She looks like she hasn’t slept in days.  But when she sees me, she smirks and gives me a hug.

Without delay, she spills her heart, and some tears, about everything.  Emotions pour out of her for nearly 30 minutes.  And I listen.  She says she’s lonely and unhappy.  She says her and her boyfriend just broke up.  And she’s sure she ruined it, because she didn’t spend enough time with him.  Because she was busy with mathematics… teaching it, grading it, and studying for more of it.  She pleads for some advice.

I tell her to slow down, to breathe, and to listen to herself and find herself.  Not the self that’s in a panic, or emotionally absorbed in a failed relationship.  But the self that loves mathematics, and her students, and is proud to be an independent woman… free to seek new directions.  She asks me how.  “How do I find that self again?  How do I reestablish my direction?”

And there’s so much I want to say.  Because I want to give her real, logical advice that will enable her to find what she so desperately seeks.  But I stay silent.  And she stares into my eyes, patiently waiting and anticipating the advice I’m about to dispense.

Instead, I reach for her hand and maintain my silence.  As I’ve lived long enough to know that, other than telling her to slow down and breathe, there’s no logical advice to give.  Because sometimes life defies logic, especially in delicate personal situations like the one she’s dealing with now.

Uniquely Ours

I’ve seen young, rocky relationships develop into wonderful marriages, and fleeting inspirations ignite a lifetime of passion and happiness.  Our life stories, like the answers we give to long essay questions, are uniquely ours.  What she wants to know is already somewhere inside of her.  She just needs time to think, and be, and breathe…  And continue to explore the undirected journeys that will eventually help her find her direction.

Photo by: Light Knight

You aren’t wealthy until you have something money can’t buy.
- Garth Brooks

• A First Kiss from Someone Special – The sweet rush of butterflies in your tummy when you kiss someone special for the very first time.
• The Realization of True Love – The warm feeling you get many years after your first kiss when you realize you married the right person.
• Beauty – Because beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
• True Friendship – Through thick and thin, they stood by your side.  They were there when you had nothing but them.
• Peace of Mind – It can only be acquired with an honest heart.
• Beginner’s Eyes – You’ll never see it again for the very first time.
• The Joy of Telling an Interesting True Story – One of the most enticing roles we lead in life is that of a storyteller.  There are few things more satisfying than telling a true story that others enjoy listening to.
• Happiness – True happiness is achieved by doing what you love and being involved in something you believe in.
• Success – Success is simply excelling at doing what you love.
• A Single Moment of Time – Once it’s gone, it’s gone.  Don’t miss it.
• A Baby’s Laughter – Babies don’t care about money.  They care about kindness, love, and living in the moment.
• Surprise Encounters with Long-Lost Friends – You haven’t seen them in years, and you figured you’d probably never see them again.  Then suddenly, there they are standing right in front of you.
• The Feeling of Self-Accomplishment – You set your sights on a specific goal and followed through until you achieved it.  Now that’s something to celebrate.
• The Sound of Raindrops Outside – …as you snuggle up on the couch.  Few sounds are more soothing.
• A Good, Genuine Conversation – Those moments of verbal bonding when the topic of conversation flows seamlessly and all parties involved gain as much as they put in.
• An Unexpected Compliment – It seems like just another dreary Monday afternoon, but then she walks into your office and says, “I love your shirt.  That color looks great on you.”
• The Feeling You Get When Your Idea Works – You’ve been struggling to resolve a complex problem all day, but you just can’t seem to get it right.  Filled with frustration, you decide to try one last idea before calling it a night.  You’ve had many ideas before that failed miserably… but this time it works.
• Randomly Hearing Your Favorite Song – You’re stuck in bumper to bumper rush hour traffic, so you crank on a radio station for a little distraction.  The opening notes to your favorite song instantly chime in.
• Watching a Live Blooper Unfold in Front of You – As you walk alongside a friend, she trips over her own feet, wobbles erratically, regains her balance, and then tries to play it off like nothing happened.  Hilarious!
• A Sunny Sunday Afternoon – The birds are chirping, a light breeze in blowing through your hair, and the sun’s rays are warming your cheeks.
• The Rush of Adolescent Love – Those magical moments of adolescent lust and affection that only you and one other person rightly remember.
• Being In The Right Place at The Right Time – You’re sitting in the nosebleed seats at a professional baseball game.  The home team batter cranks a monstrous, game-winning home run.  The ball bounces off another fan’s glove two seats in front of you and lands right in your lap.
• The Recollection of Great Childhood Memories – Do you remember the first time you learned to ride a bike?  What about wrestling with your dad?  Or climbing trees with your friends?
• Reminiscing About Old Times with Your Best Friend – Those crazy life experiences only the two of you lived through together.  Like that wild 24 hour road trip to Atlanta, or that drunken night on the 3rd floor balcony of your college apartment.
• Passion – True wealth comes naturally to those who follow their hearts.  You can’t pay someone to be emotionally passionate about something.  Nor can you pay them to psychologically give-up on their passions.
• Objects of Sentimental Value – Old family photos, your great grandmother’s music box, that painting your baby brother made for you… some things are priceless.
• The Comfort of an Old Familiar Smell – You just pulled into your parent’s driveway after being away for a long while.  You smell familiarity in the air, the scent of the pine tree in the neighbor’s yard.  As you head through the front door, more familiar smells consume your senses.  Gosh, it feels good to be home.
• The Hilarity of an Inside Joke – You’ll never get it unless you were there at its inception.
• Amazing Talents You Are Born With – Like the mind of a genius or the voice of an angel.
• The Excitement of Making Someone Else Smile – Because her smile makes you smile back.
• Exercising Your 5 Senses – Sight, hearing, smell, taste and touch.  Each provides a gateway to rewarding personal experiences.
• Sharing a Good Laugh with Friends and Family – Some of the most memorable moments in your life will be moments spent in laughter.
• The Warm Coziness of Your Own Bed – No bed is more comfortable than your own.
• Watching Wild Animals in Nature – Like a hawk gracefully soaring above the tree line, or a deer prancing across a grassy field.
• A Home – Money can buy a house, but not a home.  Because home is where the heart is.
• Waking Up to the Smell of a Home Cooked Meal – You were still asleep, but someone special knew you’d be hungry soon.
• The Peaceful Sound of Absolute Silence – Shhhhh…
• Streams of Consciousness and Clarity – You’re ‘in the zone!’  Act while your mind is hot.
• The Sound of a Light Breeze Through the Trees – It’s the sound of Mother Nature all around you.
• The Captivating Experience of People Watching – The interesting (and sometimes foolish) things people do never ceases to please.  You can’t buy this quality of entertainment.
• Watching the Sunrise and Sunset with Your Beloved – Make time for this.  It’s worth it.
• The Sound and Sight of Ocean Waves – Another phenomenal act of Mother Nature.
• The ‘Pump’ After a Great Workout – You feel like you can conquer the world.
• The Blissful Act of Daydreaming – Just being… and thinking… and dreaming.
• When She Says “I Love You” - …and you know she means it because you can read the sincerity in her eyes.
• When an Unlikely Someone Remembers Your Birthday – A friend you haven’t seen in over a month calls you at 9AM on your birthday just to say “happy birthday.”
• Finding Something You Thought You’d Lost Forever – You searched for it for days and finally gave up.  Now, six months later, it basically appears right in front of you.
• The Inspiration Behind Creative Works of Art – Every piece of art is priceless in the eyes of someone who can relate to it.  The creative inspiration behind these works of art is no different.
• When Your Pet Snuggles Up Next to You – It’s just soooo cute.
• A Moment of Eye Contact with an Attractive Stranger – You’ve never seen them before, and you may never see them again.  But a moment was shared.
• A Long Hug from a Loved One – Those deep, warm hugs you wish you could nestle in forever.
• Happily Singing at The Top of Your Lungs – Well… You know you make me wanna shout! Kick my heels up and shout! Throw my hands up and shout! Throw my head back and shout! Come on now… Shout!
• Seeing Your Breath on a Chilly Night – A simple phenomenon that has entertained children since the beginning of mankind.
• The Feeling of Acceptance – You’re now a part of something greater… and it feels good.
• Watching the Clouds Form Cool Shapes – Never the same show twice.
• Cuddling a Newborn Baby – Precious… simply precious.
• When You Know You Can Trust Someone – You can see it in their eyes and you can feel it in your heart.  They have no ulterior motive.
• Sitting Around a Bonfire with Your Friends – One of the greatest settings for reminiscing and storytelling with those your care about.
• Seeing Two Elderly Folks Who are Madly in Love – It’s a sight of love that has surpassed the tests of time.
• The Beauty of a Moonlit Sky – Few simple pleasures are more satisfying than gazing up into a starry, moonlit sky.
• The Awesomeness of Skipping Rocks Across Water – It doesn’t matter how old you get, this one never gets old.
• Watching Lightning in the Distance – Peaceful and powerful at the same time.
• Slow Dancing in Your Living Room - Dancing is like dreaming with your feet. -Constanze
• Knowing She’ll Be There When You Get Back – Yes.  There is stability in your life.  And she’s a big part of it.
• Watching Her Sleep – Just being with her and breathing with her.
• The Colors of Fall – It’s Mother Nature’s artwork.
• People Who Make You Smile Just by Thinking of Them – Wherever I am, no matter what I’m doing, just thinking of her makes me smile.
• The Warm Touch of Your Beloved – It’s the touch no one else has.
• When You Realize People Are Reading What You Write – Words can’t explain it.  Thank you.
• The Excitement of a New Comment on Your Blog – We love these. 

Can you think of anything else money can’t buy?  Leave us a comment and let us know about it.

Additional Inspirational Reading Material and Sources:

• The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch
• Excuses Begone! How to Change Lifelong, Self-Defeating Thinking Habits
• Always Looking Up: The Adventures of an Incurable Optimist
• The Noticer: Sometimes, all a person needs is a little perspective.

Photo by: Mohammadali