Life

10 Quotes for Letting Go of “How Life Should Be”

10.01.2020 by Angel Chernoff // 27 Comments

When life has to be a certain way in order to be good enough for us, we close ourselves off from so many of the real and present opportunities available.

On the contrary, when we let go of the way it “should be,” we free our minds to deal with life’s unexpected changes, challenges and chaos in the most effective way possible…

We create space for acceptance, learning and growth.

We learn from our mistakes and the mistakes of others.

We see the world through an unbiased set of eyes.

And gradually, we allow ourselves to step forward with more peace of mind.

With that said, I don’t always let go when I need to. I don’t always have a clear and focused mind. Because I’m only human, and human beings have the tendency to hold on too tight. Sometimes life slaps us really hard and we attach ourselves to the pain, even when we know better.

When I’m holding on too tight, I can really feel it in my gut. I feel anxious, frustrated, irritated, and upset. There’s an aching for things to be different than they are — a feeling of rejection or betrayal or hopelessness.

I’m sure you can relate. We’re all struggling through this one together, in our own unique way right now. And the vast majority of our torment is the result of being caught up in whatever story we’re telling ourselves about how life “should” be.

So for starters, here’s what I try to keep in mind… [Read more…]

Asking the Right Questions is the Answer: 10 Things We Forget About Our Own Ignorance

09.14.2020 by Marc Chernoff // 23 Comments

Judge a person by their questions, rather than their answers. Because asking the right questions today is the answer.

It’s a harsh fact that every one of us is ignorant in some way. Although we tend to pretend otherwise, it’s impossible to know it all.

Ignorance is our biggest collective secret.

And it’s one of the scariest and most damaging realities of life, because those of us who are most ignorant — and thus most likely to spread ignorance — are often the ones who don’t know it.

Here’s a quick test:

If you have never changed your mind about one of your beliefs, if you have never questioned the fundamentals of your opinions, and if you have no inclination to do so, then you are likely ignorant about something you think you understand.

What’s the immediate solution?

Just move one step outside of your social bubble and find someone (online or offline) who, in your opinion, believes, behaves, or handles certain aspects of life differently from you. Then, have a simple, honest, peaceful conversation with them. I promise it will do both of you lots of good.

Once you’ve done that, here are some key truths to remind yourself of on a regular basis: [Read more…]

How to Begin Again After an Unexpected Ending

08.24.2020 by Angel Chernoff // 32 Comments

As you struggle forward in the days and weeks ahead, remind yourself, it is far better to be exhausted from lots of effort, learning and growth, than it is to be tired of doing absolutely nothing.

In 1914, the great inventor Thomas Edison experienced a devastating hardship. His entire laboratory burned down to the ground, and several years worth of his work was ruined.

Newspapers described the situation as “the worst thing to happen to Edison!”

But that wasn’t true, because Edison didn’t see it that way at all. The inventor instead chose to see his circumstances as an invigorating opportunity to rebuild and re-examine much of his current work. In fact, Edison reportedly said shortly after the fire, “Thank goodness all our mistakes were burned up. Now we can start again fresh.” And that’s exactly what he and his team did.

Think about how this relates to your life.

How many times have you heard it was the end, when it was really the beginning?

How many hopeless labels have been slapped over your inner hope?

Probably more often than you realize.

The truth is, [Read more…]

3 Ways to Break Through When You’re Burning Out and Ready for a Change

08.03.2020 by Marc Chernoff // 29 Comments

In the midst of particularly hard days when I feel that I can’t endure, I remind myself that my track record for getting through hard days is 100% so far.

On my birthday many moons ago, when Google and I were both a lot younger, I Googled “how to change your life when you’re burning out” to see what would come up. I had been feeling hopelessly trapped in a cycle of busyness—like I was racing around in circles every day without any meaningful progress. And it was time to find a better roadmap because I was literally getting depressed with the same old grind.

Granted, I was working 60+ hours a week, struggling with a failing business, and coping with the recent deaths of two loved ones. The stress and pace of life just seemed to keep me busy from sunrise to midnight every day without much time for self-reflection or mindfulness, and deep down I knew the head-spinning, circular path I was on wasn’t sustainable.

As I scrolled through Google’s search results I was fascinated by the [Read more…]

1 Tiny Yet Hard Step You Need to Take for Yourself

07.20.2020 by Marc Chernoff // 38 Comments

Too often people overestimate the significance of one big defining moment and underestimate the value of making good decisions and tiny steps of progress on a daily basis.

You’re probably familiar with what’s known as the Serenity Prayer. It goes like this:

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

There’s an important lesson here—one that’s very often glossed over…

When a chaotic reality is swirling around us, we often try to relieve our anxiety by exerting our will over external things we cannot control.

It helps us stave off one of the most dreaded feelings: complete powerlessness.

With that in mind, I have good news and bad news.

The bad news is that generally speaking, almost everything is [Read more…]