When I was in elementary school my parents told me it didn’t matter what I did when I grew up, so long as it made me happy. “Happiness is the whole point of life”, my father said. “But it doesn’t always come easy. Your mother loves to help people in need, so she became a psychiatric nurse. I love reading, writing and poetry, so I became an English teacher. We both find happiness in the hard work we do each day.”
A few years later when I was in junior high, my sixth-grade homeroom teacher put me in detention for “being difficult.” She went around the classroom and asked each student what they wanted to be when they grew up. When she got to me, I told her I wanted to be happy. She told me I was missing the whole point of the question. I told her she was missing the whole point of life.
Perhaps my pre-adolescent, smart-aleck response deserved the repercussions. Perhaps my young mind was oversimplifying some necessary complexities. Lesson learned I suppose. But, I’ve still never forgotten the significance of my dad’s wisdom—especially his point about finding happiness in hard work.
Fast forward to today, and Angel and I have spent well over a decade working one-on-one with hundreds of coaching clients, course students, and live event attendees who struggle with variations of that very point—finding happiness when life demands we work hard for it. As human beings, we somehow get used to the fantasy that life should be easier than it is. Regardless of what we choose to do “when we grow up,” we subconsciously expect our chosen path to have very few detours, interruptions, and inconveniences. And oftentimes we wait around for those detours, interruptions, and inconveniences to take care of themselves.
A good case in point: I was picking up a few items at a small CVS store this morning when an elderly man with a guide dog came in. He walked to the aisle with the greetings cards, picked up a card, held it up extremely close to his face, and desperately squinted his eyes to read it. A couple other shoppers glanced at his squinting expression as they passed but didn’t stop to help him. Just as I began to walk over, a big burly guy in a Harley Davidson jacket walked up and asked him if he needed assistance reading, and then proceeded to read him about a dozen different greeting cards out loud until the elderly man smiled and said, “That’s perfect! My wife will love that one!”
As the elderly man checked out at the register, I walked up to the big burly guy and said, “I admire your kindness.”
“Thank you, sir,” he replied with a smile. “Lately, I’ve just been letting my soul guide me. I’m actually in a bit of a hurry right now, so it would have been much easier to let that man struggle, or let someone else help him, but my soul knows the easy things in life aren’t always the right things.”
Boom! Such sage wisdom.
So, with the collective sentiments of my father and that kind stranger in mind, I want to remind you that…
You need to do hard things to be happy in life.
You need to do the things most people avoid, such as those that make you uncomfortable, that are far easier to run from, that others won’t do for you, that make you second-guess yourself and question how you’re going to find the time and energy to push forward.
Why?
Because the hard things ultimately build you up and change your life. They make the difference between existing and living, between knowing the path and walking it, between a lifetime of empty promises and one filled with progress, value and fulfillment.
The key?
Consistent passionate action!
Learn to believe in your heart that you’re meant to live each moment full of passion and purpose—that each and every moment is worthy in its own way. Consider this excerpt from our New York Times bestselling book, Getting Back to Happy: Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Reality, and Turn Your Trials into Triumphs:
Passion is not something you find in life; it’s something you do. When you want to find the passion and inner strength needed to change your situation, you have to force yourself to step forward.
Many of us are still hopelessly trying to “find our passion”—something we believe will ultimately lead us closer to happiness, success, or the life situation we ultimately want. And we say “hopelessly” primarily because passion can’t really be found. When we say we’re trying to find our passion, it implies that our passion is somehow hiding behind a tree or under a rock somewhere. But that’s far from the truth. The truth is, our passion comes from doing things right. If you’re waiting to somehow “find your passion” somewhere outside yourself, so you finally have a reason to put your whole heart and soul into your life and the changes you need to make, you’ll likely be waiting around for an eternity.
On the other hand, if you’re tired of waiting, and you’d rather live more passionately starting today and experience small positive changes, it’s time to proactively inject passion into the very next thing you do. Think about it:
- When was the last time you sat down and had a conversation with someone nearby, with zero distractions and 100 percent focus?
- When was the last time you exercised and put every bit of effort you could muster into it?
- When was the last time you truly tried—truly tried—to do your very best?
Like most of us, you’re likely putting a halfhearted effort into most of the things you do on a daily basis. Because you’re still waiting. You’re still waiting to “find” something to be passionate about—some magical reason to step into the life you want to create for yourself. But you need to do the exact opposite!
Put your whole heart and soul into life!
Do the hard and necessary things, right NOW, with your whole heart and soul fully invested!
When I was a kid, my grandmother used to tell me, “Stop waiting for better opportunities. The one you have in front of you is the best opportunity.” She also said, “Too often we spend too much time making it perfect in our heads before we ever even do it. Stop waiting for perfection and just do your best with what you have today, and then improve it tomorrow.”
Believe it or not, recent psychological research indirectly reinforces my grandmother’s sentiments. For many years, psychologists believed our minds could directly affect our physical state of being, but never the other way around. Nowadays, however, it is widely documented that our bodies—for example, our momentary facial expressions and body posture—can directly affect our mental state of being too. So while it’s true that we change from the inside out, we also change from the outside in. And you can make this reality work for you. If you want more passion and happiness in your life right now, act accordingly right now.
Put your heart and soul into something!
Not into tomorrow’s opportunities, but into the opportunity right in front of you.
Not into tomorrow’s tasks, but into today’s tasks.
Not into tomorrow’s run, but into today’s run.
Not into tomorrow’s relationships, but into today’s relationships.
Angel and I are certain you have plenty in your life right now that’s worth your time and energy. You have people and circumstances in your life that need you as much as you need them. You have a massive reservoir of potential passion within you, just waiting.
Stop waiting!
If you wait for “the right time”—if you wait until you feel 100% ready—you will be waiting the rest of your life. Seriously, too many people wait too long to live their best lives. They wait all day for 5pm, all week for Friday, all year for the holidays, all their lives for passion and happiness. Don’t be one of them!
You don’t need to have it all figured out to take the next step. But you do need to take the next step to figure it out. And as you struggle forward, remember, it is far better to be exhausted from lots of passionate effort and learning, than to be tired of waiting around doing absolutely nothing.
Now, it’s your turn…
Just put your heart and soul into what you’ve got right in front of you. Your long-lost passion will gradually show up to greet you. And your inner wellness will start to change for the better. Guaranteed!
And if you’re up to it, we’d love know:
- What’s the next thing worth investing your whole heart and soul into? What’s on your plate right now that you could be passionate about, if you really wanted to be?
Please leave a comment below and share your thoughts.
Also, if you haven’t done so already, be sure to sign-up for our free newsletter to receive new articles like this in your inbox each week.
Victoria Evans says
Thank you so much for the perspective this morning. I could put my whole heart and soul into making breakfast and lunch for my children and getting them off to school today. I woke up tired and grouchy this morning, and I’ve been resting the har little bits of work in front of me before I have to get ready for work. But you know what? You’re sooo right! THESE HARD THINGS ARE NECCESSARY, and they aren’t even that hard really. And when I think of putting my heart and soul into doing it all, it reminds me that I’m actually quite blessed.
Your emails and book never cease to inspire me. Thank you. I’m also looking forward to attending your next conference in San Diego. When will the tickets be on sale?
Marc Chernoff says
I love it! Thank you for the positive comment, Victoria. 🙂 2019 conference details we be announced via email and on the thinklivebetter.com site on Oct. 8.
Jeff says
So spot on today, Marc and Angel! Passion comes from positive action. When we take steps with a positive attitude, the work we do is often more effective, because our hearts are actually in it. Keep the excellent emails and articles coming.
And to answer your question, I’m putting my whole heart into writing this comment. I read your blog every week and this is the first time I’m leaving a comment. Usually I think I don’t have time, etc, etc.
Ps. Just ordered your book too. 🙂
Marc Chernoff says
Thank you for ordering the book and supporting our work, Jeff. 🙂
Laura says
Hi Marc. I’m enrolled in the getting back to happy course and I just wanted to openly say thank you. Today’s blog post reinforces the importance of the positive daily rituals you and Angel have built with me over the past couple months. I know I still have a distance to go before I’m back on the “life track” I want to be on, but I do appreciate the progress I’ve made recently and the fact that the little daily rituals I’ve been sticking to have reignited some of the passion that I had lost before my divorce.
Blessings.
Marc Chernoff says
You’re doing excellent, Laura! Working with you has sincerely been our pleasure.
Kusum k says
The artical is so driving and refreshing. While walking the path of our lives we often forget gist of what is at hand and bother too much for what may come in future with our actions . We plan for future, which is perfect thing to be done as per human psychology but it let us loose our present we sacrifice our present for tomorrow and regret later. We think…. Think a lot what it will be like tomorrow but did not muster courage to accept that we also need to enjoy building our future. I have been strangled in past bruises and end up getting hurt again. Off late have started taking things at hands, figuring out beauty of life…. Which lies at present… Life may be tough or unfair but we should be soft and fair to ourself by untying ourselves from waiting…
Awesome article.
Thanks
Ria says
A beautiful piece of writing. I believe i needed it today. Thank you for helping me reinforce positivity in my life.
Alison says
“They wait all day for 5pm, all week for Friday, all year for the holidays, all their lives for passion and happiness.
“Thank you so much for this wonderful reminder ^^. I think you’ve also done a really good job of busting the myth that living passionately is easy. It seems like it should be, that everything should just line up nicely because well, you are living your passion! But actually, that is not the case. The right things are sometimes the hard things.
Anna says
Passion comes with positive actions.. true.. Real good blog today. Salute from Paris !
Anna
Sharon Stogoski says
Such wonderful words of wisdom, kindness, doing your best, finding and living your passion. My husband and I have never been rich, but always felt that our life together has made us rich. A passion filled life is amazing, not searching for riches but finding being happy with what you have and feeling blessed. Thank you, loved reading your words
solai says
Your story will help me get trow the herd stuff and try to be happy .it took me out of my world full of fear.it helped me relax and see what’s in front if me and what I can do about it to make it better
All i can say is really thank you!!!!
Daree says
Amazing. We talked about this in church this morning – – that doing the right things in life takes effort and most people don’t want to put in the work. I put my best efforts into moving… just got a new house and it’s smaller so I’m conscious about I’m keeping, and what I have to let go of, even if I don’t want to.
Essy says
Hey marc and Angel, so this is my first article of you guys im reading. It has really inspired me in some sort of a way, thats quite a talent you have got there. Thank you for changing my perception of things, im looking foward to more articles from you guys.
Ryan Haberer says
What a eye opening, positive, blunt , awesome slap in the face! Thank you Marc and Angel you guys truly helped me today!
Becca says
Hi and thanks for helping to keep this woman on her toes.
That being said, I love to read, love doing anything to do with words. I recently formed my editing and transcription business. With two authors under contract, and two potential.. I’m so proud of me and so happy too! When I find myself so enmeshed in correcting grammar, punctuation and spelling, it’s almost trance like. Some may think it’s crazy to enjoy this and sometimes I roll my eyes at the the way my authors write — but I truly enjoy it!
Stuart Spilsbury says
Ironically there is a transcription error in the message – there is a duplicate”the” in the final sentence. I’m available for this type of work as I am housebound. Perhaps this was your subconscious mind searching for your next employee.
stuarts238@gmail.com
Leanne Hiveluah says
I admire your writing, anything from you is always making sense . I never read your article without picking up anything. May the Lord bless you my people. You are doing wonderful things to the world. Your teaching changes many lives including mine. As I am an unemployed graduate , your couching makes my job seeking easier. Sometimes when I applied for something and I receive unfavourable answers i quickly run to re-read one of your article about give up .
Thanks once again. I wish you well both of you and continue with your work. God will reward you
BONTLE says
On point. Just the situation I’m going though. At 26 I should be more passionate but with all the set backs I’ve had in life I just needed the motivation.
Keep it up guys. Coming to you from South Africa
Anthony Souza says
Life is long if you know how to live it. Embrace life and all that it entails, for there might be a tomorrow.
Patti Fralix says
Excellent perspective on this complex subject. Passion has been a theme of mine for a long time. I have had my leadership development business for twenty-five years, and Passion, Productivity, and Prosperity have been core tenants of my speaking, consulting, and coaching. I enjoy all of your writings, but this one is especially valuable.
Chris says
I am going to drink this cup of coffee with so much passion i just may turn into a coffe bean! JK. Good words to wake up with. A great reminder that everybit of being successful requires effort, including happiness. Time to make a sit down breakfast for the fam and attack my day with 100% effort. Thanks Marc and Angel for organizing my day. God Bless
Deborah says
Thank you! Very refreshing and enlightening! Love you both!!!
Kayode says
Thank you so much for this article
putting everything I’ve got into doing my daily routine surely has been keeping my passion ….. this is just a proof that my grandma’s sentiments are true .
Joyette says
I went to bed last night at 6:30 and slept 12 hours. It’s becoming a habit because I’m just too exhausted to deal with everything in the daylight. But I’m still waking up every morning and jumping back into the day with optimism and the courage to insert yet another small change that will eventually create the big change I need. Thanks for yet another great pep-talk! Exactly what I needed!
Missy says
Thanks for the well-aimed kick in the butt. Instead of feeling frustrated that I’m sitting here in this brace this morning, I am going to put my heart and soul into my physical therapy exercises, being as independent as I can be today, and graciously accepting help from my loving and ever-patient husband when I need it. I am going to remember that I do not have a deadly disease, I am healing from surgery and will one day be whole again and be able to walk without pain. And THAT is a blessing worth being passionate about.
Sandy says
I gratefully did the hard thing in my late 20’s. I gave up a good paying career job and followed my heart into becoming a school owner & Montessori teacher. It was tough to have a few years of low employment and worse was my long-time boyfriend leaving me because he was ‘scared’ of the life I was choosing. I moved to the area of the US that I LOVED and well……the rest is history. I just retired from 30 years of living a life and career that I loved doing every day! It is actually a bit like grief now separating myself from that passion but I am beginning to transform into a new balance of using my passion while reprioritizing life responsibilities that go with this new stage of life.
Alison says
Wow! Sandy you are one brace, courageous and inspiring woman! Those children were soooo lucky to have you teaching them. Thank you for your share-I’m inspired!
Orlando says
I read your articles everyday, I also read your book. I’m reading your book in small portions at a time because, I don’t want it to end.
Since April my wife and I have been living thru very trying times. I have hit rock bottom on several occasions., causing me to see a Psychologist. This along with your book has helped me immensely.
Thank you
Op
Heidi says
The very idea of doing ‘the hard thing’ seems contrary to everything the world is telling us these days. Yet it is so true. How fortunate you were to have people to teach you this when you were young. Your story about the greeting card lifted my heart today. I have always said that “There is never a wrong time to do the right thing”.
Waiting for the ‘right time’ – the ‘best time’ – so often leads us to inaction. But just as we cannot avoid the discomfort that we experience in life (although many try) – we cannot avoid having to ‘get on with it’ sometimes – or life, and happiness – will pass us by.
Thank you so much for this important reminder!
Mom Samer says
Hi Marc and Angel,
This post inspired me a lot in many ways. It makes a lot of sense to get heart felt satisfaction through by doing intense work. There comes the time when intense things doesn’t feel intense because we already get inner strength to face it.
I just wanted you dear to throw some light on the situation for example when we were living in a palace but we are needed to live in a cottage. How to cope up with this type of ups and downs.
Thanks
Ashley Pennewell says
Absolutely loved this read. Thank you.
Brenda says
Thank you! I’ve been lucky enough to have met you in person. I attended one of your seminars in Florida. I went because I needed to feel the energy of truth you both exude. I have your books. I read your daily newsletters. You are gifts in this universe inspiring us with what life is really all about. God Bless.
Robert says
I understand and agree. My sister and best friend, Jennifer, just died suddenly at age 49. Now I see all of the people, family members who we always avoided due to their toxicity want to blame me for her death somehow. Not that they really can in any real way because she died of a medical condition combined with some bad choices that I had nothing to do with. But their general dislike for me and jealousy over the close relationship I had with my sister added to their current state of pain and anger over our loss is manifesting itself in this way. It’s been nightmarish. With Jennifer gone, I don’t know if I can continue living in this area around these ugly people. Plus I just lost half of my monthly income which is related to this bad behavior since one of these family members controls the keys. I turned Jennifer on to your daily articles by forwarding them to her in emails. She bought us both a copy of your book and signed mine with a very nice note. What a crazy situation I am in. It’s so very hard right now. You guys always have good, helpful advice. Thanks.
Jane says
Needed to hear this….I’ve been waiting for someone or something to pop into my life and give it meaning. Recently retired with a lot of time on my hands I’ve been struggling to find my passion.
Thanks for the push to looking at what’s right in front of me.
Danny Daniels says
So captivating, I have delayed my self so much because I want to be 100% ready before I can take action. Thanks for this motivation.
Greeting from Nigeria.
Danny.
Mina Narula says
Very eloquent and goes straight to the heart of the matter whenever you ask of yourself: Are you doing this with everything you’ve got of just halfheartedly? Your answer will tell you your next move. Thanks for a great reminder.
Tracey says
This was a WONDERFUL post. I want to move to Florida at the end of 2019 and I am so scared to take that LEAP, because I dont know what it holds for me. I agree about the hard things building you you up, you feel better when you work hard for somethinng…I’m trying to plan every little thing out even though no plan goes as you plan it. But I’m going to plan as well as I can & still take that leap. I wrote your points down in my diary & will refer to them often to give me the strength I need to make this move happen.
Thanks so much!!
Karen says
Great post! It is always good to be reminded on being in the moment. I often feel distracted and pulled in many different directions, so it is good to be reminded that important things are happening all round us and we just have to be awake and aware enough to see them so we can take positive action for ourselves and others.
Katarzyna says
Thank you for being a constant good influence in my life. This is one of your best articles. We do need truth like a slap in the face at times. I am starting a new job and was just thinking about how blessed I was to find it, how good it could truly be if I stopped pretending and put my heart in it. There are so many passionate people there and I want to be like them. I want to feel alive.
And I can be proud of the things achieved with my hard work. There are a few, when I think about it.
The only things that count are those we put our hearts in. The magic is, the effort we have put in never fails to make us proud, even if the project doesn’t work in the end. Passion is the way, not a destination. Believe in everything you choose to put effort into, if you can. Or just put your best effort in and wait for the magic to
happen.
Lesley says
I’m hitting 50 next year and I decided a few years ago to take one day at a time. Tomorrow is never promised to you so do things while you can. I want to do things while I still have time and while I am still capable of doing them. I have a little thing I say sometimes – Of course I’m happy I wakened up this morning, some people are not afforded that luxury.
Khanyi says
Hi Marc and Angel,
Wow, this article hit home. I really needed this.
I am actually ashamed of this but I have spent this year just waiting. In January, my contract as intern ended and I was hopeful that they would call me back and at least offer me a fixed contract, but no such thing happened.
I got so caught up on this one failure that it literally paralysed me for 9 whole months! it’s a shame, really. Finding a job is really hard, I’ve been applying and have gotten no response from companies, and it has really messed with my confidence.
But I’m gonna pick myself up. It’s gonna be hard but hey, it’s my life, no one’s gonna do it for me.
Katherine Swarts says
“Regardless of what we choose to do ‘when we grow up,’ we subconsciously expect our chosen path to have very few detours, interruptions, and inconveniences. And oftentimes we wait around for those detours, interruptions, and inconveniences to take care of themselves”–story of the first 45 years of my life. I do know how to work hard: I’ve just been putting a lot more of my control-chasing side into it than my adventure-loving passionate side.
Felice says
I really appreciate this post because literally five minutes ago, I was feeling impatient about things.
I recently decided to go back into blogging. I used to be a big blogger 10 years ago, before Facebook, Instagram, Tumblr, etc. I recently realized I needed something to do that will be fruitful and beneficial not only for me but to others.
Right now, I am investing my heart and soul onto my new blog mymiddlenameishappy.com where I will be sharing my stories, research, motivational art and experiences, hoping to show people that they are not alone in their journeys.
I feel very passionate about my new project but sometimes I feel very bogged down due to other problems in my life, thereby delaying my progress.
“Consistent passionate action!” reminded me that I have to be consistent, patient, and well-disciplined in order to reach my goals.
Patricia Guenot says
.HI Marc and Angel
Great message today. for me positive thinking and positive approach to life is a must, not alway easy as you can get bogged down in your own negative thoughts, You are right it is not easy and doing your best without taking shortcuts is a challenge, but I really believe I am up to to challenge. I woke up today feeling very grateful for all my blessings and will continue w/my positive approach to life and thank you for your wonderful book.
Judy Flowers says
Hi great so what I needed to read at the end of this day my 61st birthday. So I can put my Heart and Soul into building my Shaklee business and helping as many people change their lives as possible until my journey on this earth is done, leaving a Legacy of Faith and income.
Tosin says
How much I love to read your write ups !
Gwen Spain says
Every time I read one of your emails I think to myself that you’ll never do another one that well, but then you do! I wish everybody could read this especially those who are really struggling.
Kamal upreti says
Great article…keep inspiring and keep writing these type of wonderful article..
Thanks and Best wishes
Kamal upreti
Amy says
Oh My Goodness! This is really “Mind-blowing”, I must say.
Thank you so much M &A. Keep it up!
Rinyapam shatsang says
Just as I was facing this in my life, I came across this email while scrolling through the piles of unopened mails, looking for something for inspiration. It touches me so well. Indeed I wait too often too much for myself to be ready n 100% alright. I wait for myself to settle in, while I keep worrying n panicking. May be I should, I should really act upon everything now on. I have to create my own ways n opportunities. Thank u for the timely motivation. God bless u !
Sammy Dammy says
Wow! What a powerful statement ” You need to hard things to be happy in Life”
Thank you M & A