How To Love

How To Love

More People Like Him

You’d like Jaydee a lot.  Most people do.  He’s the kind of guy who listens when you talk, who smiles often, and who says things that make the people around him smile.  He’s intelligent, but in a way that makes others feel comfortable.  It’s the way he expresses himself in simple terms that you can understand – almost like he’s articulating the thoughts you already have in your head, but haven’t yet found the right words to say aloud.

It doesn’t matter who you are either.  Jaydee always has a way of relating to you.  Because, in a way, he’s been there with you all along.  He can think like you, so he understands you.  So many of us have limitations in our perceptions.  We understand the soldiers but not the politics governing the war.  We understand the people who go to the movies but not the ones who attend NASCAR races.  But somehow Jaydee gets all of us.  It’s his gift.

If he hasn’t actually been to the NASCAR race you’re talking about, he’ll be honest about it – but he’ll make you feel as if he was right there with you.  And once you return home after spending a night with Jaydee, you’ll catch yourself smiling and thinking that there needs to be more people like him in the world.  Because if there were, there would be far less to worry about.

Jaydee passed away today.  I don’t really want to discuss the details, because honestly they aren’t relevant.  It could have been a car accident.  It could have been old age.  We are often far too concerned with how people died, rather than how they lived.  And I want you to know how he lived.  He told stories – lots of stories that contained subtle insights and wisdom about our lives and the world around us.  And today, I want to share with you the last story he told me before he died:

His Last Story

One Sunday morning when I was a little boy my father surprised me and took me to the fishing docks.  But instead of fishing, like all the other little boys and girls were doing with their fathers, we sat down on the end of one of the docks and watched all the other children fish.  For hours, we sat there and watched until we left without ever casting a single fishing line into the water.

I was simultaneously sad and angry.  On the drive home I told my father that I’d never forgive him for being so cruel to me.  He looked at me, smiled and said, “I love you, Jaydee.”  When I didn’t respond, he asked, “Did you notice how happy all the other little boys and girls were?  Did you see their smiles?  Could you feel the happiness in their hearts?”   After a moment of silence I quickly snapped, “I don’t really care!  I just want to go fishing like everyone else!”  My father sighed and kept driving.

We went back to the fishing docks dozens of Sunday mornings throughout my childhood.  And each time we saw hundreds of other little boys and girls jumping and laughing and celebrating as they reeled in fish.  But we still never cast a single fishing line into the water.  We just sat in there on the end of that same dock and watched.  And my father never explained why.  But he didn’t need to.  Because years later, as I entered adulthood, I suddenly realized that those mornings we spent sitting on that dock was where I learned how to love.

Photo by: Yasin Hasan


  1. says

    Thank you for sharing such a heartfelt and inspirational story. We all find ourselves so focused on our own experiences that we fail to take time to enjoy watching the happiness others are enjoying. Your post really hit me this morning and inspires me to love and listen more in my life. Thank you so much for taking the time to share.

  2. says

    Someone who is part of such a beautiful story is never far from us :) I took me long time to realize that feeling happy for others was just the same as feeling happy for myself :)

  3. says

    A story which makes you think about important things in our lives. Love, life and friendship.Thank for posting this article, I feel like I knew Jaydee all my life now.

  4. Henry says

    What a truly inspiring story!
    I think we all need to take a minute to sit down and think about the small things in life that make us happy in the long run. Not the things that give us a short burst of satisfaction. I’m still in the process of discovering myself and this post just helped me even further!

    Thank you very much for sharing Jaydee’s departing story with us.

  5. Amanda says

    i love for him. but i know he love for me.i know its only little bit. we not to love long time. little duration i love for him for ever. but he not understanding my heart. i also worry about. i love to him always. i know he ever love in my heart.he is a good person. but i know he never close to me again.he always like to keep his feature good smile. so i wish his future. yo always be happy. it is my one and only wish.

  6. Blessed Peter. says

    Marc i love your post. It makes me to understand that life is not all about self but how others fill. Jesus ask us to consider others in whatever our activities are, by showing our concern for others in all situations, when happy and feeling hurt. Indeed, this post has elicited my desire for the happiness of others.

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