post written by: Marc Chernoff
10 Good Reminders for Stressful Times
“Fall seven times, stand up eight!”
Just a few things to think about when life delivers a dose of difficulty and stress…
- Happiness is never constant, and it’s not supposed to be. – You have to fight through some bad days to earn the best days of your life. To believe that you can reach a state of happiness and stay there forever, is like the tide believing she can reach for the shoreline and remain there forever; or like a fruit tree believing that if she only holds on tighter, she can keep her fruit from dropping to the ground. Happiness is simply a series of moments that come and go and add sweetness to our lives. Learn to accept this, and the more happy moments you will have. Read The Happiness Project.
- Failures are temporary situations that teach us necessary lessons. – Life’s best lessons are usually learned at the worst times and from the worst mistakes. So yes, you will fail sometimes. The faster you accept this, the faster you can get on with being brilliant. You’ll never be 100% sure it will work, but you can always be 100% sure doing nothing won’t work. Doing something and getting it wrong is at least ten times more productive than doing nothing. So get out there and try! Either you succeed or you learn a vital lesson. Win – Win.
- Even if you can’t see it now, you are making progress. – You may not be where you want to be yet, but if you think about it, you’re no longer where you once were either. You have good reason to believe that you can trust yourself going forward. Not because you’ve always made the right choices, but because you survived the bad ones, and taken small steps in the right direction. So cry for a moment if you have to, and get it out of your system. Crying doesn’t indicate that you’re weak; since birth, it has always been a sign that you’re alive and full of potential. Once you’re done, keep going! You’re undoubtedly getting closer to where you want to be.
- How you feel when you’re stressed is not a true measure of reality. – Just because you’re afraid, doesn’t mean you’re in danger. Just because you feel alone, doesn’t mean nobody loves you. Just because you think you might fail, doesn’t mean you will. Look beyond your doubts and keep searching for the truth. Be aware of your mental self-talk. We all talk silently to ourselves in our heads, but we aren’t always conscious of what we’re saying or how it’s affecting us. The way to overcome negative thoughts and destructive emotions is to develop opposing, positive emotions that are stronger and more powerful. Listen to your self-talk and replace negative thoughts with positive ones. The sun is always shining on some part of your life. Sometimes you just have to forget how you feel, remember what you deserve, and keep pushing forward.
- You cannot change what you refuse to confront. – You can learn great things from your failures and mistakes when you aren’t busy denying them. If you’ve been asking the same questions for months or even years, yet are still stuck, it’s probably not that you haven’t been given the answers, but that you don’t like the answers you were given. It takes a lot of courage to admit that something needs to change, and a lot more courage still, to accept the responsibility for actually changing it. The most important step forward is taking the first step. The simple act of getting started and doing something will give you the momentum you need, and soon you’ll find yourself in a positive spiral of positive changes – one building on the other.
- You are not what happened to you in the past. – No matter how chaotic the past has been, the future is a clean, fresh, wide open slate. You are not your past habits. You are not your past failures. You are not how others have at one time treated you. You are only who you think you are right now in this moment. You are only what you do right now in this moment. Read The Power of Now.
- Not getting what you want can be a blessing. – Not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of good luck, because it forces you reevaluate things, opening new doors to opportunities and information you would have otherwise overlooked. Remember, some things in life fall apart so that better things can fall together.
- Being a ‘work in progress’ is a great state to be in. – Stop berating yourself for being a work in progress. Start embracing it! Because being a work in progress doesn’t mean you’re not good enough today; it means you want a better tomorrow, and you wish to love yourself completely, so you can live your life fully. It means you’re determined to heal your heart, expand your mind and cultivate the gifts you know you’re meant to share. May we all be works in progress forever, and celebrate the fact that we are!
- Nobody else can do it for you. – Keep doing what you know in your heart is right for YOU. Let your dreams be bigger than your fears and your actions louder than your words. Live by choice, not by chance. Make changes, not excuses. Be motivated, not manipulated. Work to excel, not compete. Choose to listen to your inner voice, not the jumbled opinions of everyone else. It’s your road, and yours alone. Others may walk it with you, but no one can walk it for you.
- Life is not easy, but it’s worth it. – If you expect it to be, you will perpetually disappoint yourself. Achieving anything worthwhile in life takes effort. So start every morning ready to run farther than you did yesterday and fight harder than you ever have before. Above all, make sure you properly align your efforts with your goals. It won’t be easy, but it will be worth it in the end.
Photo by: BraveLittleBird