post written by: Marc Chernoff
14 Rules for Being YOU
Be yourself. Trying to be anyone else is a waste of the person you are. Embrace that individual inside you that has ideas, strengths and beauty like no one else. Be the person you know yourself to be – the best version of you – on your terms. And above all, be true to YOU – if you cannot put your heart in it, take yourself out of it.
- Get your priorities straight. – Twenty years from now it won’t really matter what shoes you wore today, how your hair looked, or what brand of jeans you bought. What will matter is how you loved, what you learned and how you applied this knowledge.
- Take full responsibility for your goals. – If you really want good things in your life to happen, you have to make them happen yourself. You can’t sit around and hope that somebody else will help you; you have to make your own future and not think that your destiny is tied to the actions and choices of others. Read Quitter.
- Know your worth. – When someone treats you like you’re just one of many options, help them narrow their choice by removing yourself from the equation. Sometimes you have to try not to care, no matter how much you do. Because sometimes you can mean almost nothing to someone who means so much to you. It’s not pride – it’s self-respect. Don’t expect to see positive changes in your life if you surround yourself with negative people. Don’t give part-time people a full-time position in your life. Know your value and what you have to offer, and never settle for anything less than what you deserve.
- Choose the right perspective. – Perspective is everything. When faced with long check-out lines, traffic jams, or waiting an hour past your appointment time, you have two choices: You can get frustrated and enraged, or you can view it as life’s way of giving you a guilt-free breather from rushing, and spend that time daydreaming, conversing, or watching the clouds. The first choice will raise your blood pressure. The second choice will raise your consciousness.
- Don’t let your old problems punish your dreams. – Learn to let go of things you can’t control. The next time you’re tempted to rant about a situation that you think ended unfairly, remind yourself of this: You’ll never kill off your anger by beating the story to death. So close your mouth, unclench your fists, and redirect your thoughts. When left untended, the anger will slowly wither, and you’ll be left to live in peace as you grow toward a better future.
- Choose the things that truly matter. – Some things just don’t matter much – like the kind of car you drive. How big of a deal is that in the grand scheme of life? Not a big at all. But lifting a person’s heart? Now, that matters. The whole problem with most people is, they KNOW what matters, but they don’t CHOOSE it. They get distracted. They don’t put first things first. The hardest and smartest way to live is choosing what truly matters, and pursuing it passionately. Read The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.
- Love YOU. – Let someone love you just the way you are – as flawed as you might be, as unattractive as you sometimes feel, and as unaccomplished as you think you are. Yes, let someone love you despite all of this; and let that someone be YOU.
- Accept your strengths and weaknesses. – Be confident being YOU. We often waste too much time comparing ourselves to others, and wishing to be something we’re not. Everybody has their own strengths and weaknesses, and it is only when we accept everything we are, and aren’t, that we are able to become who we are capable of being.
- Stand up for YOU. – You were born to be real, not to be perfect. You’re here to be YOU, not to be what someone else wants you to be. Stand up for yourself, look them in the eye, and say, “Don’t judge me until you know me, don’t underestimate me until you challenge me, and don’t talk about me until you’ve talked to me.”
- Learn from others, and move on when you must. – You can’t expect to change people. Either you accept who they are, or you start living your life without them. And just because something ends, doesn’t mean it never should have been. You lived, you learned, you grew, and you moved on. Some people come into your life as blessings; others come into your life as lessons.
- Be honest in your relationships. – Don’t cheat! If you’re not happy, be honest, and move on if you must. When you’re truly in love, being faithful isn’t a sacrifice, it’s a joy.
- Get comfortable with being uncomfortable. – Life as we know it can change in a blink of an eye. Unlikely friendships can blossom, important careers can be tossed aside and a long lost hope can be rekindled. It might feel a little uncomfortable at times, but know that life begins at the end of your comfort zone. So if you’re feeling uncomfortable right now, know that the change taking place in your life is not an ending, but a new beginning. Read The Power of Full Engagement.
- Be who you were born to be. – Don’t get to the end of your life and find that you lived only the length of it; live the width of it as well. When it comes to living as a passionate, inspired human being, the only challenge greater than learning to walk a mile in someone else’s shoes, is learning to walk a lifetime comfortably in your own. Follow your heart, and take your brain with you. When you are truly comfortable in your own skin, not everyone will like you, but you won’t care about it one bit.
- Never give up on YOU. – This is your life; shape it, or someone else will. Strength shows not only in the ability to hold on, but in the ability to start over when you must. It is never too late to become what you might have been. Keep learning, adapting, and growing. You may not be there yet, but you are closer than you were yesterday.
Photo by: Johanna MacDonald