post written by: Marc Chernoff
10 Mistakes Unhappy People Make
Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass,
it’s about learning to dance in the rain.
A person does not have to be behind bars to be a prisoner. People can be prisoners of their own concepts, choices and ideas. So tell the negativity committee that meets inside your head to sit down and shut up.
When you dream, you better dream big; when you think, you better think big; and when you love, you better love truthfully. Happiness is a choice. There are no excuses for not trying to make the very best out of your life. There are no excuses for living in a way that consistently makes you unhappy.
Here are ten happiness mistakes to avoid:
- Thinking that you have already missed your chance. – Your life, with all its ups and downs, has molded you for the greater good. Your life has been exactly what it needed to be. Don’t think you’ve lost time. It took each and every situation you have encountered to bring you to the current moment. And every moment of your life, including this one right now, is a fresh start. If you have the courage to admit when you’re scared, the ability to laugh even as you cry, the nerve to speak up even if your voice is shaking, the confidence to ask for help when you need it, and the wisdom to take it when it’s offered, then you have everything you need to get yourself to a better place. Read The Power of Habit.
- Using failed relationships as an excuse. – Life doesn’t always introduce you to the people you WANT to meet. Sometimes life puts you in touch with the people you NEED to meet – to help you, to hurt you, to leave you, to love you, and to gradually strengthen you into the person you were meant to become.
- Changing who you are to satisfy others. – No matter how loud their opinions are, others cannot choose who you are. The question should not be, “Why don’t they like me when I’m being me?” It should be, “Why am I wasting my time worrying what they think of me?” If you are not hurting anyone with your actions, keep moving forward with your life. Be happy. Be yourself. If others don’t like it, then let them be. Life isn’t about pleasing everybody.
- Putting up with negative people and negative thinking. – It’s time to walk away from all the drama and the people who create it. Surround yourself with those who make you smile. Love the people who treat you right, and pray for the ones who don’t. Forget the negative and focus on the positive. Life is too short to be anything but happy. Making mistakes and falling down is a part of life, but getting back up and moving on is what LIVING is all about.
- Focusing all of your attention on another time and place. – This day will never happen again. Enjoy it. Cherish your time. It’s often hard to tell the true value of a moment until it becomes a memory. Someday you may discover that the small things were really the big things. So learn to appreciate what you have before time forces you appreciate what you once had. Read The Power of Now.
- Overlooking what you have to focus on what you haven’t. – Most people end up cheating on others and themselves because they pay more attention to what they’re missing, rather than what they have. Instead of thinking about what you’re missing, think about what you have that everyone else is missing.
- Dwelling on the things you can’t change. – If you hadn’t fallen down, you would never have learned how to get back on your feet. If you hadn’t been forced to let go and move on, you’d never have learned that you have the strength to stand on your own. If you hadn’t lost hope, you would never have found your faith. The best often comes after the worst happens. You can either move on, or you can dwell on the things you can’t change. Either way life does move on with or without you. So learn from the past and then get the heck out of there. You will always grow stronger from the pain if you don’t let it destroy you.
- Constantly sacrificing your own happiness for everyone else. – Never let your own happiness wither away as you try to bring sunshine to others. Life is not about making others happy. Life is about being honest and sharing your happiness with them.
- Losing track of your own goals and ideals. – Knowing who you are is one thing, but truly believing and living as yourself is another. With all the social conditioning in our society we sometimes forget to stay true to ourselves. Don’t lose yourself out there. In this crazy world that’s trying to make you like everyone else, stay true to your awesome self. Read The Art of Non-Conformity.
- Dealing with the stress of deceiving others. – If you say you’re going to do something, DO IT! If you say you’re going to be somewhere, BE THERE! If you say you feel something, MEAN IT! If you can’t, won’t, and don’t, then DON’T LIE. It’s always better to tell people the truth up front. Live in such a way that if someone decided to attack your character, no one would believe it. Live so that when the people around you think of fairness, caring and integrity, they think of you.
And remember, life will never be perfect, no matter how hard you try. Even if you pour your heart and soul into it, you will never achieve a state of absolute perfection. There will always be moments of uncertainty; there will always be days where nothing goes right. But as time rolls on you will learn that even the most imperfect situations can be made better with a little love and laughter.
Photo by: Heather