post written by: Marc Chernoff

12 Negative Thoughts Holding You Back


12 Thoughts That Are Bad For You

We are addicted to our thoughts.
We cannot change anything if we cannot change our thinking.

Your thoughts today create your life tomorrow.  Here are twelve destructive thoughts to flush out of your mind.

  1. “My past is indicative of my future.” – Do not judge failed attempts and mistakes as an indication of your future potential, but as part of the growth process.  Something does not have to end well for it to have been one of the most valuable experiences of a lifetime.  When times get tough, take a deep breath.  Know that most great things come when you least expect it.  Keep working on YOU and it will work itself out.  Being defeated is a temporary condition; giving up is what makes it permanent.
  2. “I care what they think of me.” – Ignore the rude people who talk about you behind your back.  That’s exactly where they belong, behind your back.  Being strong doesn’t mean you always have to fight the battle.  True strength is being wise enough to walk away from the nonsense with your head held high.  Read The Four Agreements.
  3. “I’ll do what makes me happy someday.” – Sometimes in your quest to make everyone else happy, you make yourself miserable.  Remember, today is the oldest you’ve ever been and the youngest you will ever be again.  It’s kind of scary, but it’s true.  If there was ever a perfect moment to follow your values and pursue your own dreams, that moment is now.
  4. “I can’t,” “It’s too late,” “I’m not good enough,” etc. – We never know where we will be at the end of our journey.  We do, however, know where we are today; and from here we can mine our hope and love to set the course forward.  Our attitude shifts our sails and ultimately determines not only our final destination, but more importantly, the voyage and experiences along the way.
  5. “There’s so much that could go wrong.” – Stop being afraid of what could go wrong, and start thinking of what could go right.  Better yet, think of everything that already is right.  Be thankful for nights that turned into mornings, friends that turned into family, and past dreams and goals that turned into realities.  Use these positive points to fuel an even brighter tomorrow.
  6. “I will never forgive you.” – It takes a strong heart to love, but it takes an even stronger heart to continue to love after it’s been hurt.  If someone hurts you, betrays you, or breaks your heart, forgive them, for they have helped you learn about trust and the importance of being cautious when you open your heart.  You are stronger now and better equipped to find the kind of love you deserve.  Read You Can Heal Your Life.
  7. “I don’t like them because they’re broken.” – As you grow you will discover that you were blessed with two great hands – one for helping yourself, and one from helping others.  Be someone who builds and nurtures with an understanding and forgiving heart.  Be someone who looks for the best in people and leaves them a little stronger than you found them.  And always be careful of how you judge people – you can’t sum up a person’s entire existence in one moment.
  8. “I am too unhappy to make anyone else happy.” – Happiness is a boomerang.  When you catch yourself feeling unhappy, doing something small that makes someone else happy, and I guarantee you, when they smile, it will be hard not to smile back.
  9. “I can’t trust anyone.” – We often keep our hearts closed, not because we don’t trust others not to leave us, let us down, or stop loving us, but because we don’t trust ourselves to survive the pain of them leaving, letting us down, or not loving us anymore.  How ironic, considering that only by suffering through these very losses, do we come to realize our true strength.  Remember, like a tiny seed, in order to grow, we need to be dropped in dirt, covered in darkness, rained on, and forced to struggle slowly to reach the light.
  10. “Everyone else is doing it, so it must be right.” – Live YOUR life.  Never hide who you are.  The only shame is to have shame.  Stand up for what you believe in.  Question what other people tell you when it doesn’t feel right.  If you follow the crowd, you will go no further than the crowd.  But if you walk alone, follow your gut, and carve your own path, you will likely find yourself in places no one has ever been before.
  11. “It will never get better.” / “It will never get worse.” – This too shall pass.  When life is rough, remember, it won’t always be this way.  So take one day at a time.  And when life is great, remember, it won’t always be this way.  So appreciate every great moment.  Read The Power of Now.
  12. “I don’t have time to dream.” – The real tragedy in life doesn’t lie in not reaching your dream; it lies in having no dream to reach.  Devote yourself to an idea you believe in.  Follow your gut.  Overcome your fears.  Work on it.  Struggle with it.  Smile about it.  Make it happen.  This is your life and your dream – no one else’s.  And remember, you don’t have to see the whole staircase; you just have to take one step at a time.

Photo by: Meredith Farmer

Download the ebook If you enjoyed this article, check out our new best-selling book.
Marc and Angel Subscription via Email And get inspiring life tips and quotes in your inbox (it's free)...

Enter your email address to get new articles delivered for free:



29 Comments

  • Wow… just wow! Every post you two write knocks me off my feet.

    #10 and #12 in this post is really spoke to me. It’s time I started pursuing some of my own dreams. I’m starting today, thanks to you.

  • Marc, this is a beautiful post. Your posts touch my heart on a regular basis.

  • I am guilty of number 3 - all day, every day. Thanks for this reminder. Honestly, that’s why I love your articles - they remind me of things I know, but often get too busy to pay any attention to. You’re slowly setting me straight. :)

  • I love you guys. Thanks for giving words to all those things we need to remember and feel so that we are empowered to be ourselves and feel strong, healthy and ready to take on the world!

  • Nice article!!!!
    Loved your #9 point it did give me a differnt perspective which i never thought off ..
    It did make me think !!
    Lovely keep up the good work !

  • I keep meaning to tell you how much I love your posts and how freaky great your timing is. I often wonder where your inspiration lies and how often you sit down to write… Thank you for doing what you do!!!!!

  • I really enjoy reading your blogs and look forward to them… you are so wise in your 30 something years… such an old soul…wonderfully profound.

  • Another wonderful post!

    I actually would like to use one of them as a basis of a post that I am working on with my site. (I hope you don’t mind, I will give full credit to the inspiration)

    Love your work, keep it up. You help so many of us!

  • I’m sitting here in tears. This seems as though it was sent by the universe for me #1 and #11 really hit home. Everything I’m feeling is here. To thank you is not enough…but I will thank you for helping me through this dark, valley I’m currently in.

  • Marc and Angel,

    I’m so glad I found this site and your truly inspiring and encouraging words. You have helped me through one of the most difficult times in my life and I will forever be grateful for the advice, tips, and strength that you have provided.

    Thank you and keep on going strong!

    Andy

  • ♥♥LOVE THIS ♥♥

  • Enlightening article! I especially love the line: Ignore the rude people who talk about you behind your back.  That’s exactly where they belong, behind your back!
    I have to share this post! Thank you!

  • I am forwarding this post to my friends. thx!!! love it!!!

  • great post, as usual.

  • So true. No words can describe how much your blogs mean to me.

  • Hi Marc & Angel,
    I haven’t even begun to read this entire post but I couldn’t wait one second longer to tell you how much I appreciate your writings.

    It’s been 4 of the hardest years of my life, combined with this ruined economy and no hope whatsoever of finding the all elusive ‘day job’….while trying to become the entrepreneur (even p/t to start).

    But I haven’t given up and with continued timely writing from you guys, I won’t have to give up.
    Thanks so much,
    Holly L

  • True. We tell ourselves so many lies that holds us back from reaching our potential - let alone having a reasonable happy everyday life.
    We must uncover fulfilment, so we can get to gratitude.
    Thank God our past is NOT indicative of our future, well said.

  • Lovely reminder of how our thoughts compel the course of our lives.

  • This is so good! I like the one about ignoring people that talk behind your back.. That’s where they belong! Nicely written!

  • Very nice post as usual. Thank you for such a motivational blog..

  • Wonderful reminders for positive living. Lots of healthy food for thought.

  • Bless you for these moments when I need to hear something that reminds me of the direction I truly want to be going. I have dreams, I have a vision if not several, and while I focus on one thing to make it happen, I take gradual steps that are getting me closer to where I am headed. I tend to see all the great things that will come to pass when my plans come to fruition, but I recognize that some of these thoughts still need dealt with and are limiting my present and future growth and success. Thank you again!

  • This article provides the motivation I need. I’ll keep it handy and reread daily! Corporate America is full of #2 and quite frankly, I pray for the strength to continue to walk away from it! Excellent reminder!

  • We are addicted to our thoughts. We cannot change anything if we cannot change our thinking - This is so true. The moot question is: Is there a way to be free of the stranglehold of thoughts on our life? Yes, there is. It can be done in many ways. But the way is though the mind. Here, the mind is used as an instrument to free us from the mind-hold itself. For example, if we want to change our attitude, it can be done by changing our thoughts. A mind that is under control is able to think only on need basis.

  • Thank you for helping me become a better person each day. I’m in a road with a goal to become the best version of myself. Marc and Angel, I cant thank you enough for being a wondeful part of my journey. Keep inspiring people!

  • Thank you.

    Your words add nourishment to my life.

    I am grateful that you share with me your wisdom.

    Stay blessed and abundantly so…

  • “I’ll do what makes me happy someday.”
    This reminds me of what a co-worker said when some people in my department were talking about winning the lottery: “If I win the lottery, I’d pay off my house, put enough money away to send my kids to college, and then quit and figure out what I really want to do.”
    This made me depressed, because we’ve got one life to do everything we want, and this guy is missing it.
    And I agree with Sandy and Kim about keeping people who talk behind your back behind you. But I also think engaging them is important. I think we can be taught good habits, and we can teach them, too, just by asking, “Why did you say that?”

  • I really enjoyed this post, and your points about negative thinking. I love your message, and this quote in particular: “The real tragedy in life doesn’t lie in not reaching your dream; it lies in having no dream to reach.” Thanks!

  • I’ve been plagued by negative thoughts all my life. Thanks for reminding me of what’s important.

Leave a Reply