post written by: Marc Chernoff

11 Promises You Must Make to Yourself


11 Promises to Make to Yourself

Make these promises to yourself, and keep them.

Repeat after me: “I promise…”

  1. “I will accept everything I am, and everything I am not.” – Self-worth comes from one thing: thinking that you are worthy.  So be confident.  Too many days are wasted comparing ourselves to others and wishing to be something we aren’t.  Everybody has their own strengths and weaknesses, and it is only when you accept everything you are, and aren’t, that you will truly find happiness and success.  Read The Road Less Traveled.
  2. “I will appreciate others for who they are.” – Sometimes the way you think about a person isn’t the way they are.  On the outside, maybe they laugh, and maybe they cry; but you would be surprised at everything they keep deep inside.  So pay close attention, and love the people you care about for who they are, and not for who you want them to be.  In the long run, this is how you will get the best of them.
  3. “I will speak kindly and consciously to others.” – Open your mind before you open your mouth.  Don’t mix bad words with a bad mood.  Just be calm and deal with your emotions.  You’ll have many opportunities to change your mood, but you’ll have an extremely tough time recovering the words you have spoken.
  4. “I will speak kindly and consciously to myself.” – Wait, what did you just say to yourself?  Were they the inspiring, comforting words you would speak to a friend?  Or were they the belittling remarks you might shout to an enemy if you had no heart.  Or the negative assessments about life you would utter if you had no faith?  All day long we speak silently to ourselves, and a part of us believes every word.  So stay mindful, and ask yourself, “If I had a friend who always spoke to me in the same way that I am speaking to myself right now, how long would I allow that person to be my friend?”
  5. “I will stop trying to control everything.” – I hate to break it to you, but you can’t control everything in your life no matter how many safeguards you put into place.  But thankfully, you don’t have to control everything to find peace and happiness.  It lives with you always, deep within.  More than getting into the nuances of control itself, you should be more interested in encouraging yourself to commit to giving it up, on purpose.  See what happens when you loosen your grip, throw your hands into the air, and allow life to just happen and flow as it does, without constant micromanagement.  Read The Power of Now.
  6. “I will appreciate the beauty of small moments.” – Positive minds live positive lives.  There is always, always something to be thankful for and something to smile about.  The happiest people are not those who get everything they want; they are those who, while in pursuit of worthy goals, notice and appreciate the beauty and sweetness of everyday moments.
  7. “I will do what I think is right.” – What comes easy won’t always last, and what will last won’t always come easy.  So do the right things, not the easy things.  Whatever comes your way, whatever battle is raging inside you, you always have a choice.  In the end, it’s the choices you make that make you who you are.  And no matter what, you can always choose to do the right thing.
  8. “I will grow from my challenges.” – You can be stunned, awakened, and changed by what happens to you, but choose to grow from it, and refuse to be reduced by it.  Repeat after me: “I am determined to live a happy life no matter my challenges.  I will turn all my tales of fury into tales of glory.  I will turn all of my tales of woe into tales of WOW!”
  9. “I will realize and use my power.” – The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any.  In a world filled with doubt, you must dare to dream.  In a world filled with anger, you must dare to forgive.  In a world filled with hate, you must dare to love.  In a world filled with distrust, you must dare to believe.  And once you do, you will find that power you once thought you lacked.
  10. “I will follow the path my heart longs to take.” – Life is too short to live with regrets.  So love the things that make you smile, let go of the things that make you cry, and believe that everything happens for a reason.  Follow the path that your heart longs to take; it’s your time to shine.  If you get a chance, take it.  If it changes your life, let it.  You are far from what you once were, but not yet who you are going to be.  Read The Last Lecture.
  11. “I will have some fun while I’m doing it all.” – Some people frantically seek a predetermined definition of success as though their entire self-worth depends on whether or not they make it to the top.  Their goals and routines are wound tight around stringent routines that they repeat every single day without stopping to breathe.  And while discipline is important, think about how much better off they’d be if they unwound their vision just a little – like kite string – and ran with it like an optimistic youth, breathing and working, just for the joy of seeing if they can make it touch the clouds.

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40 Comments

  • As always, seriously phenominal advice. Now is the time for us all to follow through with the most important promises we make - the ones we make to ourselves.

  • Thanks for the kick in the rear, my friends. I just realized, that a very recent promise I made to myself I have not yet fulfilled. But I am going to get started right now…

  • Great words to live by!

  • Highly impressive and inspiring. I wonder how can you folks come up with such a really insights, what do you listen to Beatles? ;-)

    Loved it! Thank you and keep the great work.

  • Love it! #8 is huge for me as I recover from my credit and financial issues. I can tell you that, amazingly enough, our family has grown closer through it all and have come out stronger!

  • Thanks for such inspirational thoughts - I am thoroughly enjoying these articles with their practical and easy to put into practise suggestions!! Looking forward to reading the books you’ve suggested too :)

  • Perfect. I needed this after a night of insomnia and a woe. Thanks for the inspiring wake up.

  • Great article, thanks :)
    All the best!

  • I’m out of town and dealing with an illness in my family. It was so nice to find your email and get the boost I needed to rise above the clouds. Thanks guys. You two are amazing.

  • Much said, much digested. This article has taught me a lot. Thanks for this wonderful morning literature.

  • Your point on thankfulness hits home. I feel I live my life that way. Thankful for all the things, times & memories I have received along the way.

  • Great list!

    I think most of us try to control our lives at one point or another. It happens. It’s best to let go and go with the flow. :)

  • “I will appreciate the beauty of the small things” :) Perfect for today. Thanks for the inspiration!! Repost and sharing!!

  • I felt like this one was for me. Perfecto!

  • Appreciate others for who they are and to have fun while you’re doing it all spoke the most to me.

    It’s so imperative that I realize other people are just as complex as me. While talking happily and carrying themselves positively in front of me - they may be hurting on the inside. So - I should always treat others with as must courtesy as possible.

    I’ve already learned the hard way from the have fun while your doing it promise. I had the goal of graduating summa cum laude in college and reached it! But at the expense of being deeply unhappy during a time when most are having the time of their life.

    Thanks for the wisdom.

    Best,
    TJ

  • Number 1, accepting yourself, is important, but the question is how? Actually, it’s my next blog article!
    Peculiarbrand, I thought of the Beatles, too! Especially the lyrics, “Everybody seems to think I’m lazy. I don’t mind, I think they’re crazy. Running everywhere at such a speed. Till they find, there’s no need.”
    Lou, good luck. I know people who have come through debt problems to a place far better than others who didn’t. It gives you a perspective on money that is hard to teach.

  • Thank you. Reading your posts always helps me get my day started in a positive light no matter how gloomy the forecast.

  • I feel sure all of these are incredibly valuable. And in my opinion, if number 3 were the goal of all of us, the world would be a much better place.

    Martin

  • Love your practical tips for productive living! I am so glad a friend introduced me to your web-site. I am now telling all of my friends. Thanks!

  • Sometimes I feel so stuck, so attached to my thoughts, & your words nearly always pull me out of my head. I just wanna thank you for the guidance in each & every post. <3

  • These are great words to live by. These promises promise to help us build a life we can be proud to live.

    Regards.

  • Many of the 11 promises resonate with what I currently have in mind.

    The last promise especially caught my attention because I guess I just never realized to incorporate fun into my work. When I start working, I usually get intense and forget to take a break. If I interrupt my work by doing something fun, I’d feel guilty. The 11th promise makes me feel that it’s ok to have a little bit a fun in the middle of finishing a task. Thank you.

  • You need to live in that moment and close your eyes on past and keep yourself awake for a shiny future that you are in the middle of building.

    Power is control.

  • Hey, I love the post, especially the part about learning to let go .. and trying not to control everything. Helps to be reminded about it!

  • Awesome stuff for an inspired soul. Thanks.

  • Many thanks what an inspiring piece! I am grateful to a friend from whom I learnt about this site. I haven’t been the same since then.

  • Well Hello Marc, such a great post that I printed it out and will read it everyday as its a great guide to setting out for the day with your mind in the right condition.

    I can certainly agree with 4, often we are our most savage critic giving far less than constructive criticism at our latest imperfect action.

    In the film “Parenthood” the wise old lady advises her stressed out son to just relax and enjoy the rollercoaster ride of life, a wise lesson for us all.

    igor

  • Thanks for a wonderfully insightful article. So often we fail to mentally image what we want from life and how we think of ourselves.

    Your list of “Promises” will help us to do both as it’s a great guide to follow. I intend to print it and use it as a guide on a regular basis.

    And I know after reading this article I’ll be reading many more your posts.

  • Exactly what I needed to read. I’ve been in a third person view of myself the last couple days and this is right on topic of the ideas I need to address. Thank you so much :)

  • Really super cool. I thought this might be yet another plain old Internet list, but the way you put it, is excellent. Thank you.

  • It is so inspiring to read your words everyday… that I changed my homepage to be your site. No matter why I am going to the internet, I get motivated and a clear head by reading your words first! Thank you for my daily pick me up.

  • Number five had me laughing out loud, VERY loud. I repeated this to myself a few times so it stays inside my head, once and for all. Love this site, pop in once a week, but will make it more often from now on.

  • “I will have some fun while I’m doing it all. – Some people frantically seek a predetermined definition of success as though their entire self-worth depends on whether or not they make it to the top.

    Their goals and routines are wound tight around stringent routines that they repeat every single day without stopping to breathe.”

    This is crucial. One of the best things anyone can learn (and tell themselves daily) for sure.

    Goals are important of course, but in the end we set goals to increase our happiness.

    By limiting ourselves to the constant pressure and uphill battles of our own goals, we limit our happiness.

    Unintentionally, yes, but without keeping this bigger picture in mind we are fighting against our own goals & happiness.

    Thanks for another excellent post guys!
    Kyle

  • A PERFECT site, thank you! Wonderful words in this post… more power and thank you again.

  • Really inspiring words.
    Thanks.

  • It’s a great point ‘to be nice to one’s self.’ People are constantly comparing themselves to others– and it’s important to remember that we are each unique and have our own unique life stories. We must appreciate these moments and not wish our own lives away by wanting someone else’s.

  • Live is short, so I agree that it is very important to try to take advantage of every moment. And most importantly having some fun living is necessary.

  • I agreed with all the points but liked the 11th one most :)

  • Oh wow! Yes great words to live by indeed! Love it. Thank you all for the great work. I do loved #8. Look forward to more.

  • If I could follow even half of those I would be doing great. Number 5 is my real let down.

    Very inspiring.. just what I needed.

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