post written by: Marc Chernoff
12 Things You Should Know for Sure
Just a few things you should know. Because when you know better, you do better.
- The beginning is always the hardest. – Remember, being completely terrible at something is the first step to being pretty darn good at it. It just takes time and practice. In the end, it is the courage to continue that matters most. Read Getting Things Done.
- What’s right for you may be wrong for others, and vice versa. – It’s unreasonable to expect others to accept or consider your perspective if you’re not willing to do the same for them. So think for yourself, and allow others the privilege of doing so too. The truth is that the world isn’t really as it is, but as WE see it. And we all see it differently.
- When you try to change people, they usually remain the same. – But when you don’t try to change people – when you allow them the space to be as they are – they gradually change in the most beautiful way. Because what really changes is the way you see them.
- You have to decide for yourself. – Most of the time something is only awkward because of society’s preconceived idea that it is; don’t mindlessly follow that shallow perception of awkward. Make up your own mind. When it comes to choices and change, always do a gut check. What do YOU want to do? What would make YOU feel joy, passion, healthy, or on the right path? Do that. No other opinions are needed.
- Most good things don’t come easy. – Easy is to think about improving. Difficult is to put these thoughts into action. Easy is to stumble and fall. Difficult is to get back up. Easy is to judge the mistakes of others. Difficult is to recognize your own mistakes. Easy is to receive. Difficult is to give. Easy is to promise something. Difficult is to fulfill that promise. Easy is to say “I love you.” Difficult is to show it every day. As you can see, most of the things we need in life are simple, but not easy. The difficult, however, is often an indication that it’s worthwhile.
- Love is a state of being. – It’s not how much you do, but how much love you put into everything you do that counts. And love isn’t something that happens between people; it’s something you are either open to in the present, or something you are not. It’s not a transaction; it’s a state of being. Read The Mastery of Love.
- It’s not other people’s job to love you; it’s yours. – It’s important to be nice to others, but it’s even more important to be nice to yourself. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world. So make sure you don’t start seeing yourself through the eyes of those who don’t value you. Know your worth even if they don’t.
- Someone out there is capable of loving your flaws. – Let someone love you just the way you are – as flawed as you might be, as unattractive as you sometimes feel, and as unaccomplished as you think you are. To believe that you must hide all the parts of you that are broken, out of fear that someone else is incapable of loving what is less than perfect, is to believe that sunlight is incapable of entering a broken window and illuminating a dark room.
- Friendship isn’t about being there when it’s convenient, it’s about being there when it’s not. – Even if you cannot seem to walk that mile in your friend’s shoes, you are still capable of standing beside them to be a supporter until the day they learn to smile again.
- Unfortunately, some small minds will try to hold you back. – It may be difficult, but don’t let the negative voices around you bring you down. Don’t ever let anyone turn your sky into a ceiling. Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small hearts and minds always do that. The greatest hearts and minds make you feel that you, too, can become great. Read Personal Development for Smart People.
- Seeking revenge is always wasteful. – The energy you would spend trying to get revenge can be better spent creating an amazing future for yourself. Forget about them. Remember you. Working on a better you is more fulfilling than hanging on to contempt of others. Let it all go and hold on to your growth and kindness instead.
- The most important thing you can control is your mind. – Your greatest need is to clean out the enormous mass of mental and emotional rubbish that clutters your mind. You need to learn how to select your thoughts just the same way you select your clothes every day. This is a power you can cultivate. If you want to control things in your life, work on controlling your mind. In most cases, that’s the only thing you should be trying to control.
Photo by: J.T. Noriega