In the midst of bad days and hard times, it’s easy to look around and see a bunch of people who seem to be doing perfectly fine. But I assure you they’re not. We’re all struggling in our own unique way, every single day. And if we could just be brave enough to open up about it, and talk to each other more often, we’d realize that we are not alone in feeling lost and alone with our issues.
So many of us are fighting a similar battle right now. Try to remember this. No matter how embarrassed or pathetic you feel about your own situation, there are others out there experiencing the same emotions. When you hear yourself say, “I am all alone,” it’s just your troubled subconscious mind trying to sell you a lie.
There’s always someone who can relate to you.
There’s always someone who understands.
Perhaps you can’t immediately talk to them, but they are out there.
I am out there.
The whole reason I wrote these words is because I often feel and think and struggle much like you do. I care about many of the things you care about, just in my own way. And although some people do not understand us, we understand each other.
YOU are definitely not alone!
WE are not alone!
And to further assure you of this, let me tell you a quick story about a strong and beautiful woman I know who has recently felt alone, too…
What She Desires Most
She notices the people sitting in a small sports bar across the street. They’re cheering and chatting. They look so alive. She wants to cross the street and join these people just to connect with them – to be a part of something. But a subtle voice that comes from within, that whispers from the open wounds in her heart, holds her back from doing so. So she keeps walking. Alone.
She walks to the end of the city center where she sees a dirt path that leads up a grassy hill. The hill, she knows, overlooks a spiritual sanctuary. But it isn’t the sanctuary she wants to visit tonight – not yet anyway. It’s a warm, breezy Saturday night and she wants to find a place outdoors with sufficient light so she can sit and read the book she’s grasping in her right hand.
But reading isn’t what she really wants. Not deep down. What she really wants is for someone – anyone at all – to tap her on the shoulder and invite her into their world. To ask her questions and tell her stories. To be interested. To understand her. To laugh with her. To want her to be a part of their life.
But it isn’t even this connection with someone new that she wants most. At least not at the deepest level. At the deepest level, in the core of her soul, even fleeting connections with others seem to interfere with what she desires most. Which is to know that she’s not alone in the world. That she truly belongs. And that whatever she was put here to do, in time, will be done and shared with others who deeply care.
An Unsustainable Past
This young woman left a substantial segment of her life behind to be in this small city tonight. A few months ago, she was engaged to a strapping young businessman, managing a fast-growing start-up company, working long, hard days and enjoying the fruits of her labor together with a deepening community of friendships in Manhattan.
In a period of just a few months, her fiancé and her split and decided that it was easiest to shutdown the company and divide the monetary remains rather than attempt co-ownership. As they began the process of shutting down the company, she learned that most of the seemingly deep friendships she had made in Manhattan were tied directly to her old business affairs or her business-socialite of an ex-fiancé.
While this young woman didn’t consciously expect such a rapid, tragic series of events, it also wasn’t totally unexpected. Subconsciously she knew that she had created a life for herself that was unsustainable. It was a life revolving around her social status in which all of her relationships brought with them a mounting and revolving set of expectations. This life left no time for spiritual growth or deep connection or love.
Yet, this young woman is drawn to spirituality, connection and love. She has been drawn to all three all her life. And the only thing that steered her off course into this unsustainable lifestyle was the careless belief that if she did certain things and acted in certain ways she would be worthy in the eyes of others. That her social status would procure lasting admiration from these people. And that she would never feel alone.
She realizes, now, how wrong she was.
The young woman walks up a steep paved road on the outskirts of the city center. She feels the burn in her calf muscles as she marches higher and higher. The road is, at first, filled with quaint boutique shops and young couples and friends, but as it advances uphill they give way to small cottage homes and kids playing with flashlights in the street. She keeps marching higher and higher until she reaches a clearing where there is a small public park.
In this park, a group of teenagers are huddled around two guitarists who are strumming and singing an acoustic melody. “Is it a popular song?” she thinks to herself. She isn’t sure because she hasn’t had time lately to listen to music. She wants to join the group. She wants to tell the guitarists that their music is incredible. But she hesitates. She just can’t find the nerve to walk over to them.
Instead, she sits on a park bench a few hundred feet away. The bench overlooks the cityscape below. She stares off into the distance and up into the night sky for several minutes, thinking and breathing. And she begins to smile, because she can see the spiritual sanctuary. It’s dark outside, but the sanctuary shines bright. She can see it clearly. She can feel its warmth surrounding her. And although she knows the sanctuary has existed for an eternity, her heart tells her something that stretches a smile across her cheeks: “This sanctuary is all yours tonight.”
Not in the sense that she owns it. Nor in the sense that it isn’t also a sanctuary for millions of other people around the world. But rather in the sense that it belongs to all of us as part of our heritage, exclusively tailored for every human being and our unique needs and beliefs. It’s a quiet refuge that, when we choose to pay attention, exists all around us and within us. We can escape to it at any time. It’s a place where we can dwell with the good spirits and guardian angels that love us unconditionally and guide us even when we feel lost and alone.
Especially when we feel lost and alone.
Reminders for When YOU Feel Lost & Alone with Your Issues
I hope the short story above makes you feel less alone. I hope it gives you hope. But, assuming you need a little extra perspective right now – because sometimes we all do – I want to shift gears and cover a few practical reminders we often examine with our course students…
1. Every passing face on the street represents a story every bit as captivating, complicated and crazy as yours.
When you look at a person, any person, remember that everyone has a story. Everyone has gone through something that’s inadvertently changed them and forced them to grow. Everyone you meet has struggled, and continues to struggle in some way, and to them, it’s just as hard as what you’re going through. Yes, every passing face on the street represents a story every bit as captivating, complicated and crazy as yours.
I was lucky enough to have a very wise grandmother who coached me through this reality when I was just a teenager. And I was smart enough to write a journal entry about the conversation I had with her, so I could remember her wisdom decades later. Let me give you a little taste of that conversation…
I sat there in her living room staring at her through teary eyes. “I feel lost and alone and completely out of my mind,” I said. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”
“Why do you feel that way?” she delicately asked.
“Because I’m neurotic and self-conscious and regretful, and so much more all at once,” I said.
“And you don’t think everyone feels the way you do sometimes?” she asked.
“Not like this!” I proclaimed.
“Well, honey, you’re wrong,” she said. “If you think you know someone who never feels the way you do right now – who never feels a bit lost and alone, and downright confused and crazy – you just don’t know enough about them. Every one of us contains a measure of ‘crazy’ that moves us in strange, often perplexing ways. This side of us is necessary; it’s part of our human ability to think, adapt and grow. It’s part of being intelligent,” she said. “No great mind has ever existed without a touch of this kind of madness.”
I sat silently for a moment. My eyes gazed from her eyes to the ground and back to her eyes again. “So you’re saying I should want to feel like this?”
“To an extent,” she said. “Let me put it this way: Taking all your feelings seriously all the time, and letting them drive you into misery, is a waste of your incredible spirit. You alone get to choose what matters and what doesn’t. The meaning of everything in your life is the meaning you give it…”
“I guess,” I replied under my breath.
She continued, “And sometimes how you feel simply won’t align with how you want to feel – it’s mostly just your subconscious mind’s way of helping you look at things from a different perspective. These feelings will come and go quickly as long as you let them go…as long as you consciously acknowledge them, and then push through them. At least that’s what I’ve learned to do for myself, out of necessity, on a very regular basis. So you and I are actually struggling through this one together, honey. And I’m also pretty certain we’re not the only ones.”
We shared another moment of silence, then my lips curled up slightly and I cracked a smile, “Thank you, Grandma,” I said. (Angel and I discuss this in more detail in the “Adversity” chapter of 1,000 Little Things Happy, Successful People Do Differently.)
2. You are far more than that one broken piece of you.
When times are tough, and some piece of you is chipped and broken, it’s easy to feel like everything – ALL of you – is broken along with it. But that’s not true.
We all have this picture in our minds of ourselves – this idea of what kind of person we are. When this idea gets even slightly harmed or threatened, we react defensively and oftentimes irrationally. People may question whether we did a good job, and this threatens our idea of being a competent person, so we become angry or hurt by the criticism. Someone falsely accuses us of something and this damages our idea that we’re a good person, and so we get angry and attack the other person, or we cower and cry. And the list goes on.
But, the craziest thing is, oftentimes we are actually the ones harming and threatening ourselves with negativity and false-accusations…
Just this morning I was struggling to motivate myself to work on a new creative project I’ve been procrastinating on, so my identity of myself as someone who’s always productive and motivated and has great ideas suddenly came under attack. When I realized I wasn’t getting things done, it made me feel terribly self-conscious and uncertain because I began subconsciously worrying that I wasn’t who I thought I was. And this in turn made me feel very alone inside.
My solution was to realize that I’m not just one thing. I’m not always productive – sometimes I am, but sometimes I’m unproductive too. I’m not always motivated – sometimes I am, but other times I’m a bit lazy. And obviously I don’t always have great ideas either – because that’s impossible.
The truth is, I can be many things, and remembering this helps me stretch my identity so it’s not so fragile – so it doesn’t completely shatter when a small piece of it gets chipped. Then it doesn’t matter if someone occasionally thinks I didn’t do a good job, or if I sometimes catch myself not doing a good job – because I don’t always do a good job.
I make mistakes.
I am less than perfect.
Just like YOU.
And that’s perfectly OK.
3. There are people in this world who desperately need your support right now.
I think we all have the tendency to put ourselves at the center of the universe, and see everything from the viewpoint of how it affects us. But this can have all kinds of adverse effects, from feeling sorry for ourselves when things aren’t going exactly as planned, to doubting ourselves when we aren’t perfect, to feeling lost and alone with our issues when we’re having a bad day or going through hard times.
So whenever I catch myself lingering at the center in an adverse state of mind, I do my best to briefly shift my focus, away from my own issues, and onto other people around me that I might be able to help. Finding little ways to help others gets me out of my self-centered thinking, and then I’m not wallowing alone in self-pity anymore – I’m starting to think about what others need. I’m not doubting myself, because the question of whether I’m good enough or not is no longer the central question. The central question now is about what others need.
Thus, thinking about others instead of oneself helps solve feelings self-consciousness and inadequacy, which in turn makes you feel a lot less broken and alone when you’re struggling.
It’s one of life’s great paradoxes: when we serve others we end up benefiting as much if not more than those we serve. So whenever you feel a bit lost and alone with your own issues, try to shift your focus from your circumstances to the circumstances of those around you. Instead of asking, “What’s wrong with me?” ask, “How can I help you?” Find someone who could use an extra hand and make a small, reasonable offer they can’t refuse. The perspective you gain from doing so will guide you forward.
Closing Thoughts… On Being Alone
I’d like to end this post by directly addressing my fellow souls out there who are tired and weary and struggling to find happiness at this very moment, seemingly alone.
I know you’re reading this. And I want you to know I’m writing this for YOU. Others will be confused. They will think I’m writing this for them. But I’m not.
This one’s for YOU.
I want you to know that I understand. Life is not always easy. Every day can be an unpredictable challenge. Some days it can be difficult just to get out of bed in the morning, to face reality and put on that smile. But I want you to know that your smile has kept Angel and I going on more days than I can count. Never forget that, even when times get tough, as they sometimes will, you are incredible, you really are.
So please try to smile more often. Even when times are hard, you have so many reasons to. Time and time again, our reason is you.
You won’t always be perfect and neither will we. Because nobody is perfect, and nobody deserves to be perfect. Everybody has issues. Nobody has it easy. You will never know exactly what we’re going through, and we will never know exactly what you’re going through. We are all fighting our own unique war.
But we are fighting through it simultaneously, together.
If someone discredits you and tells you that you can’t do something, keep in mind that they are speaking from within the boundaries of their own limitations. In this crazy world that’s trying to make you like everyone else, find the courage to keep being your awesome self. And when they laugh at you for being different, go ahead and laugh back at them for being the same.
Remember, our courage doesn’t always roar aloud. Sometimes it’s the quiet voice at the end of the day whispering, “I will try again tomorrow.” So stand strong. Things turn out best for people who make the best out of the way things turn out.
And Angel and I are committed to making the best of it along with YOU.
One day at a time, one tiny step at a time, for the rest of our lives. (Angel and I build tiny, daily, life-changing rituals with our students in the “Goals and Growth” module of Getting Back to Happy.)
If you’re feeling up to it, we would love to hear from YOU.
Which point (or part of the story) mentioned above resonates with you the most today, and why?
Leave a comment below and share your thoughts.
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Marc and Angel, although I truly appreciate all of your articles in some way, this one really made me think about my life and struggles differently. I’ll admit that I still catch myself pitying myself because of the problems I’m dealing with. But through your course, coaching, and blog I’ve gradually learned to appreciate the fact that, to a great extent, we’re all in this together every step of the way. I’ve also learned to use some of the re-framing tools you’ve given me over the years to shift my perspective in hard times. And I’m truly grateful for that.
In this article, I deeply resonated with the idea that “you are far more than that one broken piece of you.” When I’m feeling alone, and at my lowest, I now realize I’m often doing exactly what you’ve discussed — I’m letting one broken or imperfect piece of my life dominate the entire rest of my life. Thank you for this pertinent reminder.
Seth Owen says
That story about the woman wandering through the city alone … WOW! It was as good as some of my favorite short stories from your 1,000 Little Things book. You’re truly a great storyteller. I could really “see” it and feel it. I believe the “sanctuary” is actually accessible to every single one of us. Our inner theater is not a frivolous waste of time, or a simply a play thing for the bored, if used effectively. Our minds and mental manifestations are actually a bridge we cross every day. The bridge to “what” is our choice. Too many people use it as an effective worry enhancer, or drama enhancer. However, the inner sanctuary is there for the finding. And of course, we aren’t alone in our need to visit the sanctuary from time to time, either.
Thank you for dropping this beautiful post in my email inbox on a day when I was absolutely feeling quite lost and alone with my problems.
I have been receiving your blog’s wonderful email updates for a couple years. And as a mother of two grown daughters, I have also forwarded your emails and articles to them from time to time (I’ve also given your book as gifts).
I just want you to know that you are doing an amazing and caring thing for so many who are touched by your insights, strategies and stories.
Today’s article is truly packed with so much to think about. It’s the epitome of the importance of self worth, and such a beautiful reminder of our human connectedness through common struggles. I also absolutely LOVE your depiction of the sanctuary.
Anyway, I finally had to write to you to thank you personally for all you do.
Great pick-me-up on this very lonely, isolated day for me. I do wish I could reach out to people who I think are going through the same struggles. It still feels like there is no one that can understand these issues around me. Thanks for your comments, emails and personal experiences that enrich us all. I, for one, really appreciate your blogs. Thanks to others for posting also!
Paula Link says
I can’t choose one part of this that applies most to me, because it’s as if it is written directly to me. Earlier this morning I told someone that I am embarassed at my inadequaceis and thinking of leaving a group that is dear to me and that I’ve been a part of for 20 years. My husband recently died, and I am very much at odds with myself, the world, and my place in it. Thank you for the encouragement.
Paula, you are at a very tender point in life with the recent loss of your spouse. Everyone feels at loose ends at such a time. Long standing relationships are so necessary for support. Stand firm and trust that you will grow stronger as you rely on God and your friends.
Dear Marc and Angel,
I read your articles religiously, they always seem to say the right things at the right time.. life is such a struggle right now and sometimes I wonder if things will get better but thanks to you I manage to turn my thoughts around and see things in a more positive manner. Thank you so much for being there for me and God bless you.
Thank you, I needed to hear this today!
Thank you for this one today. Yes, you wrote this one for “me” – as it was an extremely lonely morning and I lay here struggling to start the day. I completely relate to the story and needed to read that today, so thank you. I will try to move forward the best I can.
I started my day the same exact way.
If you feel like e mailing me, you can.
Thank you for this blog. I have been procrastinating and feeling lost and alone. Today is a new day and I will start anew. I value all your communications, each one always ‘speaks’ to me and some aspect of my interrupted life. Thanks again.
I have liked everything you, Marc and Angel, have written. I’ve always liked your guest articles. But I REALLY liked and needed this one this morning. And while I’ve known — and remembered — for the past few decades of my life that everyone out there is carrying a heavy load, this was a good reminder at a time when I am really angry at someone who has been most unkind to me for the past year and did in again just a couple of days ago. Thank you so very much, Marc.
Today’s short story really hits home for me.. I am that girl in many, many ways.. i have much the same wants as she does, although i tend to isolate myself to prevent any possible rejection, even when i know that it is not good for me.. i usually find something to “take home” out of each of your daily posts, so thank you for that. Still working on ME..
The meaning of everything in your life, is the meaning you give it.
The concept of you are not everything all the time / broken pieces.
It’s too bad that the people who regularly read and are inspired by your posts and awesome insights, can’t each connect in some way… maybe a spot on your site for a discussion thread..?
I like that idea Dee. A thread would be great.
Joyce June says
Thanks for the encouragement! I’ve decided to start every day with your writings! I need the inspiration!
Chris Alarcon says
I really appreciate the positivity you send out daily. I relate with feeling lonely at times and in the past I would always look to be part of the crowd. I felt that I wasn’t good enough, and I was also hard on myself.
Now that I’m 25 I’m in a better state of mind. I thank this to surrounding myself with the right people and cutting others out of my life.
However, I don’t have everything figured out , far from it actually. This post has helped me realize that it’s ok to be alone at times, and that others do go through hard times just like me.
Keep up the great work. I’m a new fan, and I constantly read your articles.
“There are people in this world who desperately need your support.” That sentence really caught my attention because if we just look around and listen closely to what people say we will see hurting and lonely people. I am one of these people but what really soothes the deepest part of my own soul is when I have connection with someone at their most authentic / vulnerable places. For example, two people at work, one struggling with the hurt from an absentee father and the other with depression. As I watch, interact and listen closely I slowly take off part of my own onion to tell them a little about myself so they know I am a possible safe place for them to talk. As much as this allows them a safe place to talk this also helps me not feel so much like I am just surviving for a paycheck every single day. I am very thankful for people when they are able to become authentic and vulnerable because I know how hard it can be to take the onion layers off.
Well said David!! I am that way. I open myself up and allow others (if they wish) to open up to me). It’s an intimate and honest interaction then. Those that don’t want to partake walk away 🙂
It’s a comfort to know that there are many people in this world that feel the same as you are describing. I am not perfect and never will be and don’t want to be, because if I was, there would be no room for change and growth.
I love the part about having a conversation with your grandmother. Clearly she was a strong and loving woman who was honest with herself and you as well. We should all be so lucky as to have someone like that in our lives that we can turn to and feel totally accepted for who we are.
Thank you for being there for all of us and helping to make us feel “normal”. You are both a blessing to us all. Take care.
Marc & Angel All of it it like your inside my mind and I’m crying just knowing I’m not so different or alone and I can’t seem to want to make New friends since a move 4 years ago I ho to work come had a church home but dropped out of that only communication is work and text I need someone to tap my shoulder say hey I see you I understand just talk ..but working at a call center I’m all mentally drained don’t feel like talking to anyone….yet when evening comes I have whined down I want someone to talk to something positive not issues which are my only callslistening to others what about me. But reading your words help and thank you for your God sent openness and emails. Hopfully i buy the book one day ..thank you for BEING!!
THANK YOU…THANK YOU…THANK YOU!!!
Tesa Guevara says
Thank you Angel and Marc for your timely words….i just want you to know you’re keeping me company with my ups and downs, well, mostly downs and i don’t feel so alone. do keep up the great work! God bless.
“We are actually the ones harming and threatening ourselves with negativity and false accusations “.
This is true because sometimes our major problem is wanting to be like others when we know nothing about what they are passing through. Thanks a lot! It’s always interesting to read your mails.
Susan Embry says
This post is an amazing morning pick-me-up. Thank you for the details and the depth. Your writings have my back in so many ways every time I read them.
This post really hits home with me. I was feeling very depressed about my life and situation this morning and struggling to even face the day. I recently lost a job that I had taken when moving to new area. My age is a factor in finding a new position. I do feel very much alone and think no one else is in such a position. So will take these thoughts to heart and try to start again. Thank you.
This message today really touched home. I don’t normally fit in anywhere and I love being unique but I just really want friends at least one or two. Its frustrating being alone. Thing is I cannot invite anymore users abusers into my life. I can’t handle trying to explain something to another person that doesn’t listen or want to understand or care. Im tired but I am going to keep going. I’m going to be just me. Im going to do my best. Walk in the way of my passion and pray that I find the company that I need. Thank you for being here when I need a little extra encouragement 🙂
I needed this this morning feeling a bit lost in my life choices this weekend glad I read this and will share it. Thank you again I know I don’t have the answers to everything today but that is okay !
Yesterday I attended a memorial for a friend who lived with me. She had recently moved across the country for her next adventure as she always did, and then I would receive notice that she was coming back to my home again. I learned that she took her own life a few weeks ago. We need reminders like these every day, that sometimes things go wrong, but soon things will go right. I wish the world looked better to her and that she could have made it through one more hard day.
Sorina Constantin says
Marc and Angel: I don’t know how you do it, but your articles are always hitting the spot! Thank God for your inspiration in everything you are writing. Tonight I am buying your book because I am convinced it will be a great tool to help and support me in my overall growth and daily strength. Thank you for everything you write, think and do.
Laura E. Dundas says
Do you have any suggestions for how to stop feeling sad about how people treat their fellows? I just finished reading Underground Railroad. I grew up when World war II was raging in Europe. How can I stop feeling the sorrow of what power seems to do to people?
This post was timely and inspiring.
I too, am currently trying to cope with heartbreaking loss once again. So I might find comfort in long drives, watching the sun set over the ocean or even simply enjoying quiet time as I listen to my inner voice. Most people don’t understand, and that’s perfectly fine but there’s a difference in being alone and feeling lonely. I can even recall a very long period in my life when I prayed for the freedoms I have now. It’s all a part of what makes us who we are.
I had a nice long discussion with my brother a while ago where he reminded me of what’s important, and that it doesn’t matter what people say, I know the truth and I am now refusing to allow others to define me. I feel confident that my current situation will not break me. Believe it or not, I’ve been through worse.
Each day brings new chances and opportunities, and I am also incredibly grateful to those who didn’t give up on me (maybe they are the ones who need to have their heads examined ?) but whatever happens next, I will always be eternally grateful.
Ps. I meant that I believe I know the truth of who I am.
Good post, I’ve been there decades ago and learned. Please shorten
your posts; I receive too many duties and emails. Thanks.
Thank you. You just gave me a new perspective of my day.
God bless you.
Perla milner says
Thank u always for reminding me and so many others to make each day count!! You are a blessing in my life!? Receiving your e-mails makes a difference 🙂
Karen Openshaw says
That is so lovely. Like others I have given your book as a gift, regularly forward your mails and share your wisdom with my clients (indeed with anybody I know who needs lifting) I read them every day – and there is always something in there that helps me or I am then able to use to encourage someone else.
I got really poorly last year – I have burned out several times after putting everything into making sure that the project or charity I am working on is successful. I was diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (M.E) in 2011 but, after visiting a rheumatologist in January this year Fibromyalgia was diagnosed. Once again I was burnt out. In an attempt to be well I started lots of supplements (didn’t want medicated drugs – I was withdrawing from the citalopram I had been prescribed for the CFS, which was hideous) and gave up caffeine and alcohol – all of this whilst trying to develop my business, look after my family and deal with difficult situations in the wider family – add to that the person I had been able to confide in and share with and pray with for the past 7 years moved away. I can honestly say I have never felt lonelier – not since my mum died when I was a teenager.
In my business I encourage, enable and equip people to be the best versions of themselves they can possibly be – there were times I felt like such a fraud! How could I help others when I couldn’t help myself.
Along with prayer I use mindfulness as my sanctuary and am now also learning better self compassion. I feel so strongly on the subject of the importance of self compassion I am going to write a book on it!!
I know that all my wounds and my resilience make me a better healer – there is no better role model than Jesus – The Wounded Healer (Henri Nouwen)
Thank you Marc and Angel for your honesty, your vulnerability, your desire to make life better for others! God bless you
Sylvia Thomas says
I appreciate the wisdom that both of you share. I am grateful for your willingness to share your lives, your struggles, your insights. It brings more authenticity to your comments, knowing that the insights are not just platitudes of how things “should” be. God has very obviously given you a gift of connecting well with people to help them through life’s struggles. Thank you for sharing that gift with us!
Carole Ann says
Thanks to Marc and Angel
And all those brace souls who have shared
I felt lost, lonely, horrible today and I’ve made a lot of mistakes
I’m down but not out
Your kind wise words move me forward
A great article guys! I recall a TV programme that aired 55 years ago (omg – am I that old?!) called Bus Stop which followed the lives of random travellers passing through a small town in America. Each had their own story to tell behind their otherwise “normal/mundane” outward appearance.
Rebecca Johnston says
Thank you so much for this. I was feeling very desolate this morning and having a panic attack as my son recently passed and I have no car or job and was home alone. You help more than you’ll ever know! I took a bike ride and felt better and will try to plan some things and take steps forward. I used to have a full life and will have to create something new somehow. I appreciate your taking away the sense of isolation. Your articles always speak to me. Thanks again.
Linda Ardell Wendfeldt says
Hi Marc and Angel,
You two have a special gift of hitting the nail on the head with amazing precision. I have been validated, reassured and cuddled by your wisdom and your style of approaching those difficult issues in our lives countless times. Thank you for offering up your true gifts to the rest of us. We are all in this amazing, very short life together!
God gave you both a wonderful gift to share with all your readers. Thank you for being the encouragers you are for those of us facing challenging situations.
THIS WAS WONDERFUL, I LOVE THE WAY YOU NEVER DISMISS HOW HARD LIFE CAN BE AT TIMES, BUT SOMETIMES WE NEED A REMINDER TO NOT DWELL ON THINGS FOR TO LONG AND RISK A DOWNWARD SPIRAL OF WOE IS ME, BUT WE ALL NEED EMPATHY IN HURTING AND LONELY TIMES AND THE MESSAGE YOU BROUGHT WAS SO WELL BALANCED, I THINK WHEN YOU HAVE VERY LITTLE STRENGTH LEFT, IF ALL YOU CAN MUSTER IS A SMILE THATS GOOD ENOUGH, I AM SETTING BOUNDARIES TO KEEP MYSELF SANE AND GOD,S FORGIVENESS SAYS TO ME, MOVE ON , YOUR MESSAGE WAS THE SAME VERY HOPEFULLY AND WISE THANKYOU XXXXX
Thank you. My finding out about my wife’s infidelity recently has had me in a real unhappy place. I know that I’m not alone. But some days I feel overwhelmed and totally out of touch. Today is one of those days.
So your post today was a perfect gift for me. One of the best I’ve received from you. You have no idea how much you help complete strangers some days.
Like you did today for me. Thanks
Teri Gardner says
My husband of 40 years has recently abandoned me and our 19 year old son. He refused to pay bills out home about to be foreclosed on June 2 I have been a sahm for 20 years . I am desperate for help. Your story made me realized that I need to be more positive and I feel this will sort out itself , at least I hope so. I have been looking for a job for awhile and I feel that would be a start in the right direction. Thanks for your uplifting message .
Renee Robinson says
Tina R says
Marc and Angel – I just want to say that I am so grateful for finding your website. I have struggled for a VERY long time with not being happy and having a feeling of constant discontent and disquiet.
I look around all the time and ‘see’ people who seem to have it all together, who leave unhealthy relationships and stand alone, strong in the world or who seem to be coping where I am screaming inside. Deep down I KNOW that that is not truly the case, and when you dig into their story you realize that they are feeling the same insecurities you are, but even knowing that I can still fall into the trap of feeling like I am the only one who feels the way I do and something is wrong with me that I need to fix.
This link helped to reiterate that we are all the same deep down, some of us are just better actors than others.
Thank you so much for the work you do, for your insights and inspirations. Many of these things we all already know, we just lose focus and lose our way and need to be reminded and reminded and reminded…