post written by: Marc Chernoff
10 Things to Do Even if They Judge You
What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you?
Truth be told, no one has the right to judge you. People may have heard your stories, but they can’t feel what you are going through; they aren’t living YOUR life. So forget what they say about you. Focus on how you feel about yourself, and do what you know in your heart is right.
Here are ten things to do even if others judge you for it:
- Take care of yourself. – Your relationship with yourself is the closest and most important relationship you will ever have. If you don’t take good care of yourself, then you can’t take good care of others either; which is why taking care of yourself is the best selfish thing you can do. Read The Mastery of Love.
- Do what you know is right, for YOU. – Don’t be scared to walk alone, and don’t be scared to like it. Don’t let anyone’s ignorance, drama, or negativity stop you from being the best you can be. Keep doing what you know in your heart is right, for you. Because when you are totally at peace within yourself, nothing can shake you.
- Follow your own unique path. – Every new day is a chance to change your life. Work on making life all that you want it to be. Work hard for what you believe, and keep your dreams big and your worries small. You never need to carry more than you can hold; just take it one day at a time. And while you’re out there making decisions instead of excuses, learning new things, and getting closer and closer to your goals, know that there are others out there, like me, who admire your efforts and are striving for greatness too.
- Lock yourself away from the world and work on your goals. – Dream big dreams, but realize that short term, realistic goals are the key to success. Success is directly connected with daily action. The way we spend our time defines who we are. Successful people keep moving, by doing small things every day that bring them a couple steps closer to their dream. They make mistakes along the way, but they don’t quit – they learn and press on. Read Getting Things Done.
- Adjust your goals and dreams as life changes. – A great deal of pain in life comes from having a specific dream that you’ve fallen in love with, and when it doesn’t work out exactly as planned, you become angry that you now have to pursue a different path. If you want to tame your inner demons and make the most of life, you must not become rigidly attached to just one specific dream, and remain open to there being an even better, equally as happy path ahead. Life is unpredictable, but it provides plenty of opportunities to make dreams come true. Just don’t forget that sometimes taking a positive step forward requires you to slightly adjust your dreams, or plan new ones – it’s OK to change your mind or have more than one dream.
- Forgive those who have wronged you. – Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. Forgiveness is an attribute of the strong and wise. Forgiveness allows you to focus on the future without combating the past. To understand the potential of everything going forward is to forgive everything already behind you. Without forgiveness, wounds can never be healed, and moving on can never be accomplished. What happened in the past is just one chapter. Don’t close the book, just turn the page.
- Show everyone your love and kindness. – If you are reserving your love only for those who you have decided are worthy of it – all strangers excluded – it may come as a surprise to learn that this is not love at all, it is called judgment. Judgment is selective, love is all embracing. Just as the sunlight and the wind do not discriminate, true love does not make any such distinctions either. Love and kindness is a way of living. Where there is love, there is no judgment. Where there is judgment, there is no love. Read The 5 Love Languages.
- Stand up for others, even if it’s the unpopular thing to do. – Sometimes you will say something really small and simple, but it will fit right into an empty space in someone’s heart. Dare to reach into the darkness, to pull someone else into the light. Remember, strong people stand up for themselves, but stronger people stand up for others too, and lend a hand when they’re able.
- Fight through your failures. – When you are feeling down or dealing with failure, don’t be ashamed. There’s nothing to be ashamed of. You are going through a difficult time, and you are still pushing forward. That’s something to be proud of – that you are fighting through it and slowly rising above it. Let everyone know that today you are a lot stronger than you were yesterday, and you will be.
- Keep your head held high and keep on smiling. – Every day of your life is a page of your history. The only time you run out of chances is when you stop taking them. Don’t cry over the past, cry to get over the past. Don’t smile to hide the pain, smile to heal the pain. Don’t think of all the sadness in the world, think of all the beauty that still remains around you.
Photo by: Ben Smith